


Twilight: Redux

by WroughtBetwixt



Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Abuse, Abuse of Authority, Abusive Relationship, Alternate Universe - Canon, Canon Rewrite, Complete, Dark, Death, Disabled Character, Don't Have to Know Canon, Emotional Abuse, F/M, Fix-It, Gay Male Character, Gen, Love, Love/Hate, Mental Abuse, Mind Rape, Murder, Physical Abuse, Physical Disability, Psychological Trauma, Psychotic Boyfriend, Shapeshifting, Smart Bella Swan, Verbal Abuse, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-22
Updated: 2012-09-13
Packaged: 2017-11-10 12:15:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 20
Words: 84,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/466151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WroughtBetwixt/pseuds/WroughtBetwixt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Born from NaNoWriMo, an attempt to rewrite Stephanie Meyer's "Twilight" in a more twisted, sadistic story of love, murder and a teenage girl's search for the truth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prelude

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to Twilight: Redux.
> 
> This fanfic was born in November during an induced state of writing fury which has come to be called 'NaNoWriMo'. As such, it is a rough and choppy little thing, far from polished but deemed good enough to place before the readers and hear their opinions. However, please keep this in mind:
> 
> This is not the Twilight you've come to know and love… or on the other side of the coin, know and hate. Or both, as in my case. It is going to be "au", "ooc" and completely messed up. I am rewriting (or have rewrote, depending on when you're reading this) Twilight for my November project. I adored the plot and the ideas, but bless her soul, Meyer's writing did nothing for me. And of course, there were characterizations and events I disliked, ideas I wanted to try out, etcetera. The typical fanfiction stuff, you know how it is.
> 
> I WILL warn you about one difference between this and Meyer's original works: I AM NOT AN EDWARD FAN. If you expect this fanfic to be Edward friendly, or for Bella and Edward to have some flawless, perfect romance, turn around and go home now. Real life doesn't work that way, and neither will this fanfic. You've been warned. ;P
> 
> I do not plan to publish this, claim it as mine, try and get credit for it, yaddayadda. I do not own the Twilight saga, nor any of the characters within. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy the story, both parts changed and parts familiar. I would very much appreciate comments, whether they are in praise or criticism.
> 
> Thank you. Without further ado…

"Trust me."

"How?" I said to the vampire, looking up and focusing the edge of my words directly at that beautiful, deadly creature. "After all of this, how can I trust you?"

He was silent for a time, then spoke quietly, his voice disturbingly gentle despite the coldness behind his words. "Is there any other option? All I can do is tell the truth."

The truth. Isn't that what I'd been searching for since this journey had begun? From the moment the word 'vampire' had passed my lips, I had sought the truth, and yet it had always danced just beyond my grasp. And now, as I gazed into this vampire's obsidian-black eyes, I thought I knew how Eve must have felt when presented with that damnable apple.

"Make your choice," he said softly. As if there was actually a choice to make. He'd already made it perfectly clear that there was only one way left out of this mess. "And make it quick."

Was it wrong to be frightened? Having chased this very thing for the better part of a year, was it wrong for me to want to turn around now and run away, as far and as fast as I could? Probably not… A saner person would have done such much sooner than I, which either meant I was brave or insane.

My bet was on the latter.

He held out his hand, offering to me much more than help up from where I sat. "So…?"

I took a breath and lifted my own hand, allowing myself to reach for that sweet, dark promise… as I knew I would.

"I want to know everything."


	2. Chapter One

The September sky was a beautiful, azure blue, clear of any clouds and the air still a bit too warm from the not-yet-gone summer. I leaned my head against the window of the '75 Ford pick-up, watching the Arizona landscape whirl by as I headed towards my fate. I tried to take it all in; it would be some time before I saw my beloved Phoenix again.

"Are you sure about this?"

I turned my head, offering my mother the most cheerful smile I could possibly muster. "Of course I'm sure. It'll be nice to see Forks again."

My mother didn't look at me as we pulled into the airport, but a quick glance at her expression told me all I needed to know-- she didn't believe me. I couldn't blame her, really. It's not like I'd ever taken a shine to the tiny logging town of Forks, Washington; it lay entirely too close to the ocean for my comfort, and it's spot right at the head of the Olympic Peninsula earned it the top spot of the most cold, rainy and sunless places in the lower states.

It was, to me, the very definition of torture. I hated any sizable body of water with a passion and, after an accident three years ago, I had quit taking my yearly, summertime trips to visit my father there… even in the middle of August, my right leg would complain about the temperature in a way that only damaged body parts could. Combined with seemingly ceaseless trips to this or that doctor and my mother's own failing health, leaving Arizona had formerly been out of the question.

But now, only a month after my mother had gotten remarried, I had put my foot down and decided to go to Forks of my own free will. Home was no longer the warm, welcome place it once was, though it was still a sad, sorry day that Moss Land had become more inviting than this desert paradise. My mother had managed to see through her post-wedding elation and frequent alcohol-induced fogs long enough to object, throw a fit and finally, in defeat, drive me to the first stop in my escape route.

"Do you want me to come with you?" my mother asked as she pulled up to the drop-off curb, her eyes shifting nervously to look past me at the crowds of people coming in and out of the giant building. She smelled like stale whiskey and her shoulder-length, black hair was tangled; for a moment I wondered if Phil would be able to handle the job of taking care of her, even though I knew he could.

I smiled at her in what I hoped was a reassuring fashion, even as my own heart started to pound in my chest. "It's fine, really. You should go home and rest... I'll call you when I get there, okay?"

"Are you sure that you're sure? It's so cold there, and there's fewer doctors," she insisted, her voice increasingly slightly in pitch as she clenched the steering wheel. "What if something goes wrong?"

"Mom, I have everything I need," I replied, making my tone firmer. It was an understatement, truth be told. I had more than I needed. "And I have all the phone numbers for my doctors, their e-mail addresses and everything in case my new doctor needs to get in touch with them. I'll be okay."

Trying not to cry, my mother finally nodded and reached into the glove box, handing me an envelope. "It's something just in case. If you ever need to come back…"

My throat closed up a bit as I tucked the envelope, and the money inside, into my scuffed up, faded-black duffle bag. I leaned over the torn up seats and gave my mother a huge hug. She twisted her fingers tightly around the wheel when I pulled away, so hard that her knuckles turned white. A stab of guilt went through me as I grabbed my only piece of luggage and forced the door's lock open.

"Thanks, mom. I love you."

"I love you too, sweetie," she mumbled.

And then I was gone, out the door and heading towards the terminal before I could change my mind. I tried to ignore the stinging in my eyes as I heard the junky truck backfire as it drove away. The airport was buzzing with activity, and I very nearly tripped over no less than three people on my way to check in. Biting my lip, I tried to get to my seat at the gate without maiming myself or anyone else, but by the time I sat down I had cause a security guard to spill coffee on himself and had nearly run over a little old lady in my rush to apologize and escape.

I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and sunk down into the plush chair. I tried to block out the noise and focus on my breathing in an attempt to keep myself calm. It was difficult to tune out the screaming children, the yelling and sound of planes thundering overhead; I took my CD player out of my duffel bad, my hand twitching slightly as I slipped on my earphones. As soon as the delicious sounds of Ozzy Osbourne filled my ears, I could feel my muscles start to relax. I stared at a single spot on the ceiling and let myself drown in the music.

It was starting to sink in exactly what I was doing when the plane finally pulled up and I boarded; logic always has the worst timing. I shoved my bag in the compartment above my seat, sitting by the window and staring out at the magnificent sky. Soon, the plane moved and began to rise up into the expanse of blue, the features of the land becoming smaller and smaller as we went higher. I toyed with my silver medical bracelet as I began to relax once more, my mind wandering to Charlie.

Charles Swanson, Chief of the Forks Police Department and my father, had married my mother Rene when they were nineteen. Her health problems and their clashing personality led to their divorce when I was only a few months old. She left Forks to return to Arizona not long after, and the chances to see Charlie had been few and far between up until I was about ten years old. I started to visit him every year from the end of school in June to the start of school in September. He always dragged me to La Push at least once per summer so that he could go fishing; it would have been horrible had I not made friends with a few of the local Natives, including the son of my father's friend, Billy Black. But then the accident happened…

My hand twitched, and I looked away from the window, plucking a National Geographic's magazine from the mesh holder on the seat in front of me. I flipped through the pages idly, skimming. I hadn't seen my father in three years, had barely even spoken to him. I couldn't imagine how he felt, having me come to live with him after all he went through the last time we were together. It was lucky for us both, perhaps, that he was practically married to his work and I was all too busy trying to keep on track in school to really worry about the time we spent together.

Nevertheless, there were definitely going to be some awkward moments, and I didn't want to think about them. Instead, I focused on the gorgeous pictures in the magazine, thinking of my own camera packed away in my bag and daydreaming of the day that I would submit one of my own works and see it published. Eventually I fell asleep, waking a few hours later with a jolt as the plane landed in Seattle. I shuffled off the plane, grabbing my bag and trying not to fall over it when I accidentally dropped it twice.

After grabbing a bite to eat at one of the little Chinese places inside the airport and nearly missing the second half of my flight… a somewhat terrifying ride on a prop job with a suspiciously loud sounding engine… I arrived in the city of Port Angeles. My vision swam a bit as I stepped off the plane, but a strong arm caught me before I had the chance to fall over. I peered up and offered a bright smile to a taller man, streaks of silver in his curly black hair and friendly blue eyes. He smiled back, and I offered my father a hug.

"Well, glad to see you, too," he said gruffly, but there was a hint of laughter in his voice. "Did you have a nice trip?"

"Which one? There were plenty," I teased, following him to his car once my legs felt solid again.

He grinned a bit, taking my bag and stuffing it into the trunk. Naturally, he had driven his police cruiser to pick me up… and would be using the same cruiser to haul me back and forth to school every day. I admired the vehicle before I got into it, but the teenage half of my brain was ready to die from embarrassment at the thought of being carted around in it. I pondered walking to school instead.

"How's Rene?" Charlie asked, starting the car up and easing out towards the road to Forks.

"She's good," I said, forcing a bit of cheer in order to hide the lie. My father would only be depressed if he knew that his ex-wife had become a self-medicating recluse. "She hasn't has a seizure in a while," I added. A little bit of truth for good measure.

Charlie was quiet for a moment. He glanced at me before turning his attention back to the road, eyebrows furrowing a little. "And you?"

I winced. He didn't push the subject, and I was thankful for the following silence. Any time we had talked the last few years, we never talked about the accident, or my health. It was a subject I knew we would have to confront at some point, but the thought of it made me nauseous. Letting out a soft sigh, I looked out the window at the passing scenery. I hated change, and the change from the bare, dry desert to green everywhere I looked was quite a sudden, significant one… But the shift in the physical landscape was still more familiar than the emotional chaos my step-father unwittingly invited into my life, and I found myself growing less resentful and more grateful for this lush, mountainous environment.

Which, of course, didn't change the fact I despised it with every fiber of my being.

The rest of the hour-long ride was mostly filled with uncomfortable pauses, small talk about the weather and school, which would be starting the next day. Charlie had already gotten most of my paperwork filled out; all that was left were the doctor's notes I had brought from home, which were to be dropped off when I picked up my schedule from the office in the morning. Before I knew it, we had reached the main highway through Forks and were approaching Charlie's home. He drove up the familiar road and parked in the drive-way; I got out of the car, grabbed my stuff from the trunk and turned to face my new residence.

It looked exactly the same as the last time I'd seen it. A cement walkway led along the side of the large yard, through a small and depressingly empty flower bed and to the white door with a pretty glass pattern, which looked like it had seen better days-- a piece of cardboard covered a hole in the pattern, and my dad smiled sheepishly at my raised eyebrow.

"I had a bit of an accident with a fishing pole," he said, digging the keys out of his pocket. "Been meaning to fix it…"

I wasn't surprised. Nor was I surprised by the fact that, when we walked into the house, it was just as unchanged as the outside of the house. A glance to the left showed me the same old coat rack and the same red rug at the bottom of the staircase, while a glance to the left revealed the same pictures on the wall… mostly of Charlie fishing. From where I stood I could see almost all the living room with the same old leather furniture, and I could see a bit into the kitchen… which had, apparently, gotten a paint job and what looked to be a new fridge. I took all this in as I walked towards the stairs, setting my bag down and shedding the puffy jacket I'd acquired in Seattle.

"Can you make the stairs?" Charlie asked quietly, taking my shoes as well as his own and setting them in their proper places. "We could switch rooms if you want."

I grabbed my bag and smiled in the most cheerful manner possible. "I can make it. It's not so bad, really."

He nodded at me, then wandered into the living room to turn on the television. I breathed a sigh of relief, happy that he was nothing like my snoopy and persistent mother, and made the trek up the stairs and to my bedroom. The old wood floors didn't squeak as much as I remembered… perhaps another of the sparse improvements… but the rest of the upstairs was the same as the downstairs. Clean, minimalist and comfortably familiar.

Walking into my room, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders. The walls were the same pale blue-grey, the carpet was still the oddly mismatched forest green, and the curtains hanging off the window were still the floor-length, white and lace-like ones from my childhood. My bed was different, a larger one with a dark wood headboard and bedding the same dark green as the carpet. There was also a desk now with a dinosaur of a computer perched on top of it with wires sticking out every which way behind it… it reminded me of some plastic sea monster. Still, I was touched; not only would it help me with homework, but it allowed me to e-mail my mother as I'd promised her I would.

It was thanks to the familiarity and sense of stability that I considered the idea that maybe… just maybe… this whole thing wouldn't be the absolute nightmare I'd first thought. There was hope, and I clung to it as I flopped onto the cushy bed and closed my eyes. A small smile crossed my face; I sat back up and began unpacking before I could fall asleep. There wasn't much in my bag to put away; most of the clothes I'd had were entirely too light for the weather in Forks, the handful of book I'd brought with fit easily into the small nightstand next to my bed, along with my wallet and various medical information, and my camera found a home next to the computer. Within ten minutes, everything was where it should be, save for the bathroom items.

I wandered out of my room and into the bathroom I would have to share with Charlie. Much to my displeasure, the bathroom was the one room my father obviously had a difficult time keeping organized; shaving equipment, shampoo bottles and various other things were scattered about, though to his credit, it looked like an attempt to clean up had been made. A drawer even had my name on it, labeled with a hunk of masking tape and black marker. I laughed to myself, slipping my toothbrush, washcloths and various toiletries into the drawer after I'd turned the shower on to let the water warm up.

Realizing I'd forgotten my towel, I rushed back to my room and plucked it off the bed. It was heavier than it should have been, and I was puzzled for a second before remembering the picture I'd rolled up inside it. I unfolded the towel and brought out the picture of my mother and me, safe and in one piece. My good mood waned entirely too quickly, and I found myself fighting back tears; I was already missing my home. Regardless of the reasons for coming here, this was going to be more difficult than I wanted to admit.

I set the picture on top of my nightstand, hugging my towel to my chest as I grabbed my night wear… also forgotten on my first trip… and went back to the now steam-filled bathroom. The hot water helped ease the slight ache in my leg, and the process of shampooing my hair proved complicated enough to distract me from my depression. After I was convinced that I'd scrubbed away all the airport germs, I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. I dried myself off and shimmed into my plaid sleeping pants and oversized t-shirt, snagging a comb and getting to work on my hair.

I looked myself over as I detangled my hair, my mind turning to thoughts of my new school and what would be in store for tomorrow. I was most like my father in temperament, but more like my mother in appearance. I had inherited my longer, black hair from both of them, though the slight curl of my locks was an unfortunate gift from my father's side of the family. My skin, slightly less plagued by the typical teen imperfections due to my diligence with cleansing products, was a light cinnamon; this wasn't a tan from the Arizona sun like most people assumed, but the result of a combination between my mother's Greek and my father's Jewish ancestry. My facial features were similar to my father's family, with rounder eyes a little bit of a stronger nose, but from the neck down I was like my mother, taller than average with a large bone structure and baby fat that never quite went away.

It was that last set of features which often caused me the most problems among others my age. I was never slender or dainty like my blonder, fairer-skinned classmates, even though I was in decent enough shape from my years of dancing before the accident and from my regular walks out into the wilderness after. Fit or not, my weight has still been a subject of derision in all my prior school years, and I found myself making my millionth half-hearted and utterly futile promise to myself to watch what I ate. A love of food and of cooking had been programmed into me since the day I could say 'pita bread'.

School was going to be hell, I already knew, and that fact was only highlighted in my mind as I slipped on my medical bracelet. It was a tiny school of less than five hundred people, less people than had been in my old school's entire junior class, and the kids had probably all known one another since they'd been fetuses. I was a strange looking outsider with the social skills of a fruit fly, an abnormality, and being unable to do the things a regular teenager takes for granted wasn't going to help me fit in. If my own mother, the person who knew me best in the world, wasn't even on the same page as me…

I sighed, finishing my hair and spritzing it with leave-in conditioner. Tossing my brush into the drawer, I wandered back to my room and draped the soggy towel over my desk chair. This year, I had to focus and stay on task. I'd nearly failed the first two years after the accident, and had struggled last year; this year was going to be different. As much as I wished that I could be an average student with a gaggle of friends and worry about clothes and parties more than my education, it wasn't possible. I had a glitch in my brain. Nothing was going to change that. I would be happy with just having a smooth, quiet couple of years before I moved on to pursue my dream of professional photography.

My eyes wandered to the picture on my nightstand. In the photo, my mother was smiling, her arm around me as we both leaned against a bright red Mustang. Flopping down onto my bed, I rubbed my knee and picked up the picture, studying it. That me was also smiling, car keys in hand. It was my fourteenth birthday in the picture… and two entirely different people. Memories, and nothing more. I set the picture back down on the stand, face-down this time. I got up, shut my door and turned off the lights before heading back to bed and crawling under the warm covers.

Outside, the wind howled as it wound its way through the trees surrounding the house. Rain wasn't far behind, the clouds that had hung over the entire area since I'd arrived finally opening up and dumping what seemed to be half the ocean onto the town of Forks. The entire trip from Arizona, combined with the dreary weather and exhaustion, unleashed the emotions I'd been holding back. All of it in one day, for me, proved entirely too much to handle.

Pulling my covers over my head, I curled up into a ball and cried.


	3. Chapter Two

The incessant beeping of my alarm clock told me it was morning and, ready or not, time to get up. One never would've been able to tell just by looking outside-- any trace of morning sun was well hidden by the solid sheet of rain and clouds.

I stared at the red, flashing lights of the clock. I'd been staring at them off and on since I'd fallen into a restless sleep near midnight. My body felt heavy as I sat up and walked to the bathroom; my fingers were twitching, but I ignored it and slowly got dressed and brush my teeth. After about half an hour of attempting to look presentable, I gave up, shrugging on the jeans I wore the day before and an old, dark blue hoodie I'd gotten from my grandmother when she visited Las Vegas for the first time.

Eventually, I'd managed to gather up my wallet, my information for school and make it down the stairs without breaking my neck. When I got to the end of the stairs, I noticed a brand new backpack sitting by the door. Curious, I went over to look; it was black and a dark, maroon red… my favorite color. It was filled with pencils, paper, notebooks… and a little note, folded up inside.

_I love you, Bella. Have a good day._

_\- Dad_

Wow. I stared at the note a moment, then tucked it back into the backpack. That was something I planned on saving for as long as possible-- it wasn't every day that my father put forth that sort of emotional effort.

Going into the kitchen, I found Charlie there eating breakfast. "Hey," I greeted, grabbing some cereal and sinking down into the second of the two chairs in the corner.

"Good morning," he replied, looking up from his paper. He smile faded a tiny bit as he saw what was undoubtedly the giant circles under my eyes that I'd haphazardly tried to hide with concealer make-up, the only sort I bothered wearing on a regular basis and a tell-tale sign of my being overly tired. "How are you?"

"A bit shaky," I admitted. "But I'll be okay once I start moving around. Uhm… Do you want me to pay you back for that stuff in the hall? I brought some money with for supplies."

Charlie's smile came back, his expression slightly embarrassed. "No, consider it a gift. I wanted you to feel comfortable your first day."

"Thanks, dad. That's really nice of you."

He nodded, and we fell into out usual silence; he hated being emotional just as much as I did. After we were both finished with breakfast, I left the kitchen and slipped on my jacket, waiting for Charlie by the door. While I waited, I looked over the pictures on the wall. My dad when he first became a cop… him with my mother in the delivery room, the baby version of me in his arms… him holding up a giant salmon with his friend, Billy Black… and a picture of him standing with me at a dance recital, one of the few my mother had actually allowed him to attend. I felt my throat close up, and I quickly looked away.

Charlie was there just then, and though he didn't say anything as he opened the door and we headed to the car, I knew that he'd seen my looking at the picture. I ducked my head; I wanted to avoid discussing that subject for as long as possible, and while I was certain that he wouldn't bring it up without some sort of warning, it was awkward enough to just have it hang in the air between us. To my joy, the entire ride towards to High School was without conversation of any sort, let alone on the 'prohibited topic'.

The High School itself wasn't anything like I'd seen before. As we pulled up a good half an hour early, I puzzled over the odd layout of the building before I realized it was actually several different buildings of varying sizes, almost like a housing complex more than a government establishment. There were oodles of birch trees lining the perimeter of the entire place, a natural boundary-line that was a stark contrast to the metal, barb-wired topped fences around my school back in Phoenix. The homey, reddish brick of the buildings was also different from the traditional plaster and plastic getup…

… I wondered if they had a metal detector.

"Here we are," Charlie announced needlessly as he pulled up to the front of what looked to be the main office. I pulled up the hood on my jacket, more for fear of being seen than fear of getting soaked. "Good luck."

"Thanks," I sighed.

As if, my mind grumbled. It was a quick dash from the cruiser to the office. I opened the door and scurried in, pleased by the unexpected warmth and brightness of the office. No sickly florescent lights, no police guards and of course, no metal detectors… Just a few well-placed, ivory-colored lamps that went nicely with the butterscotch walls and darker brown furniture. Pulling my thoughts away from the interior decorating, I yanked off my hood and walked through the thankfully empty room to the counter.

I bit back a flutter of nervousness as the lady there glanced up at me expectantly. "Uhm… I'm Isabella Swanson. I transferred in from Phoenix, the papers I got in the mail said to come here," I said hazily, hoping that she knew what I was talking about.

The woman didn't even attempt to hide the fact that she was looking me over, sudden, surprised recognition in her green eyes. "You must be Charles' daughter! Sure, I have everything you'll be needing right here… We've been wondering when you'd come back."

While I was tempted to ask who she meant by "we", I resisted; in a town this size and a scandal like that, "we" likely meant everyone in Forks who was old enough to remember my mother's furious departure. I smiled feebly, leaning in closer as she pulled out a small stack of papers and began explaining my schedule, the trimester system and pointing out on a map the best routes to all of my classes. I was grateful as she jotted down some notes, seemingly able to guess that I'd never remember half of what she was telling me.

"And there you go!" the friendly woman concluded, handing me the papers with an accomplished, beaming grin. "Anything else?"

I hesitated a moment before opening my backpack and giving her the medical notes from my Arizona doctors. "There's this. Ch… My dad said he already talked with a couple of my teachers about it, but…"

The red-head accepted the notes and slipped them into a folder without even peeking. "I'll be sure to pass them along," she promised, then handed me a yellow slip. "Have your physical education teacher sign this and bring it back at the end of the day, okay?"

I tried to at least sound upbeat. "Sure thing."

"Welcome to Forks, hun."

Managing to suppress a snort of discontentment, I pulled my hood back up as more students started wandering in and headed for my first class. Fortunately, my coat was nothing outstanding and in the torrential downpour, no one even bothered looking to see if there were any unfamiliar faces. I did my best to not slip on fallen leaves as I shielded my trusty map from the rain, peering at it and eventually just hoping I was going the right way.

Eventually I figured it out and made it to the first building of the day, a vague literature class that sounded like I may have taken it already. Someone held the door open for me, and I said a quick thank you as I entered the room. There weren't many students there yet, so I removed my coat and hung it up on the rack as quickly as possible as to not look suspicious, snagging a chair in the back as far away from everyone else as possible. I kept my head down, becoming very interested in the patterns etched into my desk from previous generations.

"Hi, there."

I looked up at the sudden voice, feeling my nerves start to go again as a medium-height boy took the seat next to mine. A few of the other students, most notably a pair of girls that reminded me all too much of the pale, bleach-blonde cheerleaders from back home, finally noticed that there was an anomaly among their ranks. Naturally, it was those two girls which gave me the same look they'd give a junkyard dog before turning back around to whisper amongst themselves. Apparently, things weren't so different here, after all.

"Hi," I grumbled, turning my attention back to the boy and resisting the urge to strangle him.

The boy was very slight, with longish, slightly oily black hair and silver glasses. He had poor skin and overall looked like the typical nerd, but he had honest, friendly brown eyes and despite his faux pas of drawing attention towards me, I found myself wanting to like him.

"I'm Erin," he said, offering his hand, which I shook. "You must be Isabella."

"Bella," I corrected. "Nice to meet you, Erin."

He seemed pleased. "Bella, got it. My mom is a secretary at the police office and knows your dad, so I heard about you coming a week ago. I just wanted to say that if you need any help, you can ask me."

The bell rang and the teacher stormed in with a scowl, immediately launching into the rules of the class and handing out the course plan. It prevented any further discussion, but I silently thanked Erin in my mind; it had given me something to cling to, knowing there was at least one person who I could possibly befriend. I glanced over the outline of the material the class would be covering and my relief deepened. Most of the reading material on the list were things I'd already covered in my Sophomore year back in Phoenix, save for the Edgar Allen Poe… something I'd devoured on my own when I should have been doing math homework. Despite the grumpy teacher-- who was busy yelling at one of the blonde girls, I noted with smug pleasure-- and my tendency to not be fully awake at this hour of the morning, it was another comfort to know that I'd start my day off with a subject I knew well.

By the end of class, I'd firmly grabbed a hold of that small shred of confidence and hung onto it for dear life as the bell rang and everyone started filing out to the next dose of educational torment. When most of the people were gone, sans Erin and a few others, I got up and went to grab my jacket. The sleeve of my hoodie road up, exposing my medical bracelet; I quickly pulled the sleeve back down as I shrugged my jacket on. Erin wasn't far behind, comparing his schedule to mine and walking with me as if we'd known each other for years.

"I have a question," he asked suddenly as we headed towards my Government class. "Feel free to tell me to mind my own business, of course."

I busied myself with my map. "Yeah?"

"It's just that I saw… uh, your bracelet. I was just wondering…"

Great. I sighed, folding my arms across my chest. "I have epilepsy," I explained. "I'm taking medication for it, but if I get too stressed out I could have--"

"A breakthrough seizure," Erin filled in. I stared, and he gave me a nervous grin. "Your hand twitched a bit in class. My older sister has epilepsy-- it's not that uncommon, really."

I didn't know what to say. I'd learned from years of being around others like me that there wasn't much anyone could say. "Oh."

He smiled as we arrived at the building for my Government class. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. I know how it is."

"Thank you, Erin. Really."

Erin winked at me, waved and was gone. The tension in my shoulder eased away; as friendly as the boy was, I felt like I'd been holding my breath the entire time. I was going to have to get used to the idea of talking to people after all. I would wait until later before determining if that was a good or bad thing.

Government class was much like English, only the teacher… a younger, energetic male that liked to use sweeping, dramatic hand motions to emphasis his words… was much less grumpy and actually seemed to enjoy bantering with his students. I earned more stares, both during class and on my way to my next class, Geometry with one Mister Ermine. He resembled his name-- small, beady black eyes, a nose that seemed to twitch every five seconds and a horrible disposition. He forced everyone who came in to stand at the front of the room and wait until he called class to order. We were forced to introduce ourselves before he barked out where to sit; the list was alphabetical, which meant I had time to try and calm myself down before he called my name.

When I was called, I quickly stammered my name and that I liked hiking before hurrying to my seat, nearly tripping over the next girl on the way there. Said girl was a tall, willowy red-head named Angela who smiled at me as she came to take the seat to my right a few moments later. We barely said hello, both of us still blushing from our turn at the metaphorical chopping block. At the end of class, Angela shyly offered to walk me to my next class and introduce me to one of her friends. I agreed and followed silently at her side, hiding a bit behind her in a vain attempt to avoid more stares from strangers.

My next class was Spanish. I had taken German at my other school, but since it wasn't offered here in Forks, I had to make do. As we approached the building, a small, wiry girl that looked like a shorter, darker-haired and outgoing version of Angela was waiting outside; she waved wildly at us. As we got closer she stopped, staring a bit before almost jogging over with wide, bright green eyes.

"Oh my god, you're the Chief's daughter!" she breathed. "It's so cool that you lived in Arizona. Was it warm? Do you miss it? How's Forks? I heard your mom ran off with an Italian, is that true?"

Angela gave me an apologetic smile. "Jessica…"

The girl, apparently named Jessica, stopped asking questions long enough to see the look on my face and recognize it as discomfort. "Oh! Oh geeze, sorry. I'm Jessica. …Nice tan."

"My mother's family is Greek," I muttered as Angela left me in the care of her hyperactive friend. I could feel a massive headache coming on.

We took our seats in Spanish, and for the next hour I tried my best to answer Jessica's endless questions. Yes, Phoenix was warm. Yes, I missed it dearly. Forks was the bane of my existence, and my mother's new husband was very, very American. By the time class had ended, I'd managed to tune the girl out completely; she'd apparently asked me everything she could think of and was now babbling about all the hot boys in the school and which ones she think I'd be good with on our way to the cafeteria. I stared straight ahead, taking in slow, deep breaths and trying not to panic at the sight of hundreds of students crammed into what my mind saw as a very tiny space.

"Hey, you okay?" Jessica asked, putting a hand on my shoulder as I felt my legs get a bit wobbly. "I'd have thought you'd be used to a lot of people, being from Phoenix."

"I ate outside," I sighed. "By myself."

She seemed to grasp the meaning of such a thing. "Ohh, you were one of _those_ people. We don't have many loners here, just follow me and you'll be fine. We have our own unofficial table…"

Jessica kindly led me through the maze of tables to the lunch line, pointing out which foods were edible and which should be avoided at all costs. I grabbed a plain salad and an orange juice… my sad attempt at trying to fulfill my promise to eat better, which I ruined by adding a big glop of lukewarm ranch dressing to the sickly, wilted lettuce. I added some mushy olives and tomatoes in an attempt to balance things out, then followed a patiently waiting Jessica to this 'unofficial table' she'd mentioned.

I felt myself blushing again as she introduced me to the handful of other people sitting there. I recognized Angela and Erin, and there was a blond, athletic-looking boy there from my English class who looked vaguely familiar. I tried to remember everyone else's names, but I knew that unless I wrote them down or had classes with them, it would take a few weeks before I got them memorized. Angela, Eric and the one boy all seemed pleased to see me, most of the others were appropriately reserved, but one of the girls very nearly sneered the minute she heard my name; there was always at least one in a bunch. I tried not to stumble as I squeezed into a seat as far away from Snooty Girl as possible next to Erin. I focused on my salad as Jessica began talking a million miles an hour and explaining her connections to everyone at the table.

Suddenly, I felt a small chill go up my spine. I looked up, glancing around the cafeteria with a growing feeling of unease. My eyes landed on a table in the far corner, and I swiftly looked away when I realized one of the table's occupants was staring directly at me. Despite my embarrassment, I glanced towards the table again.

There were five people sitting there, none of them talking. It seemed that every table surrounding their own was empty, as if an invisible barrier blocked others from coming within a ten foot radius. The second thing I noticed was that none of them were talking; there were three males and two females, and all were outwardly pre-occupied with other things. Finally, I took in their general appearance. All were dressed in dark, muted colors and in a style that seemed a little bit too casual, even for Forks… plain and very unassuming. But they…

They were anything but plain.

The first of the males was massive, likely taller than my own father, with dark, curly hair and arms that looked like the man could snap the table he sat at in half. The one sitting next to him seemed smaller and slighter, less intimidating with his ratty camo jacket and tidy, trimmed blond hair; his demure appearance was betrayed by the powerful-looking muscles that moved under his skin as he spun his unopened milk carton around like a top. Unlike the other two, the last male looked youthful and somehow a bit less mature, his bronze-colored hair untidy and looking like he'd not bothered to comb it. He was a bit taller than the blond but thinner, and less buff. The females were equally daunting in appearance, the first being a tiny, almost elfin looking creature with short, spiked hair. The second female and the last of the five looked like she'd stepped from a magazine despite her plain clothing-- tall and lean with impressive curves and long, golden hair that far outshone the bottle blondes in the surrounding tables.

Although they were all different, they did share several key qualities… All looked like they could easily bust your face if you pissed them off. All of them shared a skin tone that could almost be described as translucent. All of them sported dark eyes with bags under them, as if they all were suffering from insomnia, and they were all impossibly, incomparably beautiful.

I couldn't look away. There was something about them, about the way they looked, that reminded me of the exquisite, timeless and pale marble statues my grandmother kept of the Greek gods. And it was the last of the males, the youngest-looking one, which had been staring at me. My eyes went back to him; his back was towards me once again, and I felt a ridiculous stab of remorse at not being able to catch a glimpse of his face again.

"Ah, so you've spotted the Cullens."

Snapping out of my trance, I turned back to see Jessica looking at me with a slight scowl on her face. "Sorry," I stammered. "I… Who are they?"

Jessica flipped her hair, glaring over my shoulder towards the five with open contempt. "They're the kids of Doctor Cullen, the newest guy at our hospital. Well, adopted kids. Jasper and Rosalie Hale are the blonds… I guess they're related to the Doctor's wife. Emmett is the big guy, then there's Alice… and Edward," she very nearly sneered the last one's name.

I struggled for words as I glanced back at their table. "They're… gorgeous."

She shrugged. "They're weird. They've been here for two years and haven't talked to anyone… the Doctor is nice enough, but still. And besides," Jessica lowered her voice in a gossipy fashion, "they _date_ each other. Alice and Jasper go out, and so do Emmett and Rosalie. How creepy is that, yanno what I mean?"

"How do you know that?"

"My mom's friend knows someone who's a nurse at the hospital, of course."

Of course, I thought with dark amusement. I reminded myself to never trust anything Jessica had to say on other people. "What about Edward?" I asked, thankful that my darker skin tone would at least help hide the fact that I was blushing. Jessica and Angela exchanged glances, and I felt myself go from being embarrassed to curious.

"Edward doesn't date," one of the other girls said quietly. "And we don't bother asking."

Suddenly, Jessica brought up a dance that was apparently coming up on Halloween, and the subject thus was switched. I didn't attempt to bring it back to the mysterious, strange teenagers; it, like many things between my father and I, was a forbidden subject here at this table. That much was clear. But why…? I found myself allowing my eyes to wander back towards the table where the five sat… And I froze as my eyes met the coal-black depths of Edward Cullen. For the first time that day, a set of eyes didn't look at me with interest. No, these eyes looked at me with something entirely different.

Hatred.

The bell rang and I jumped in my seat, almost falling off the chair as I turned away and grabbed at my backpack. Angela, who shared Biology II with me, waited until I detangled myself from the table and stumbled to my feet. My heart was bounding wildly in my head, and I stopped for a moment to take a few slow, deep breaths. I couldn't seem to think and walk at the same time… and I was too busy thinking about those eyes, and the emotion within them. Angela, happily, didn't ask-- I wasn't forced to explain the unexplainable terror that boy's gaze had caused. Sure, staring was rude, but still…

Finally, I was able to walk without falling down, and we headed towards the next class. I focused on Angela and her explanation of the biology class, the teacher, and what I'd have to do to get out of dissection labs. We neared the classroom and she paused before adding one last, vital bit of information.

"Edward Cullen is in the class," she said, looking at me as if to drive home the importance of this fact. She didn't say anything else, but I could hear the unspoken attempt to prepare me for something within her words.

"Goodie," I muttered.

Angela either didn't hear or choose not to reply to my lack of enthusiasm, opening the door to the room and going inside. I followed, the happiness of my love for science fading fast in the face of a sudden, gripping sense of panic. I sucked in a breath as I took in the scene before me-- my clumsiness had apparently made us late, and Angela had snagged the second-to-last seat next to the dude from my English class and from the lunch table. I suddenly remembered that his name was Mike-- yet another bit of useless information brought to you by the mind of Isabella Swanson.

There was only one seat left, and I bit my lip as hard as I could as I slinked over to the spot next to the pale, bronze-haired figure. I set myself down on the chair as quietly and carefully as possible, praying to whatever gods would listen that Edward Cullen wouldn't recognize me as the staring girl from lunch. While the teacher took his spot at the front of the class, I did my best to keep my eyes forward and not tempt fate by peeking at my classmate. But the faint sound of metal against linoleum caught my attention, and on my way back from getting the class textbook, I noticed that he has moved as far away from my seat as possible without completely leaving the table.

What the hell was his problem? I felt a flicker of irritation rise inside my mind. For a brief, cynical moment, I wondered if I had forgotten deodorant that morning. But no, my personal hygiene wasn't the issue. I wished it was that simple, especially when Edward came back from getting his own textbook, our eyes briefly meeting; his face twisted into what was almost a sneer. Perhaps, like the girls in my English class and the girl at the lunch table, he had simply found something about me to dislike…

I closed my eyes, focusing on my breathing and to the teachers droning voice; my panic began to fade, replaced more and more by curiosity. No, the way he looked at me was different than the others; it was something else, something more than the petty snobbery of my typical High School experiences. I had committed some sort of trespass, though I didn't know what I possibly could have done to offend him enough to glare at me in such a fashion. Regardless, there was nothing I could do about it while I sat in Biology II-- I wouldn't think about the boy who set next to me, those eyes… and the fact that maybe Jessica, despite her questionable sources, might be right.

There was something not quite right. A puzzle. I didn't know what, and I didn't know how on earth I would find out, but one way or another, I had to know more about Edward Cullen. There was one thing I knew for sure-- this year was going to be more interesting than I'd thought.


	4. Chapter Three

I stared off into space for the rest of the class, contemplating all the excuses I could make to get out of having to cut up frogs; the thought of dealing with amphibian guts was more than enough to distract me from just about anything. The whole affair dragged on much longer than the classes, and whether it was because the end of the day was drawing closer or because I was sitting next to one of the most beautiful and apparently most hostile people in all of Forks, I didn't know. Finally the bell rang, and my ill-tempered companion rose from his seat and was out the door before anyone else could even stand up.

"What was that all about?" Mike asked as he and Angela wandered over, tilting his head a bit towards Edward's empty seat.

I felt like melting into the floor. "Uhm… was something the matter? I didn't notice."

"Cullen was totally trying to make your brain explode with his thoughts or something. I've never seen anything like that."

"Oh," I squirmed inside while we walked out the door and into yet another cloudburst. I pulled my jacket hood up; it was truly starting to double as a way to hide from stares, glares and curious onlookers. "Is he normally so… cranky?"

Mike let out a small snort. "The Cullens stick to the Cullens. The rest of us just ignore them. I'm really starting to wonder about that guy though. Too weird."

I had gym with Mike, as it turned out, and so we waved goodbye to Angela and headed towards the larger building. Mike was the utter opposite of Angela in personality, oddly reminding me of a male version of Jessica. He chattered the entire way to the gym about everything from breakfast cereals to the store his father owned. I tried to participate in the conversation as best as I could, but the best I could offer was my opinion on Frosted Flakes.

He finally took a breath and stopped yammering as we reached the girl's locker room inside the gym, rubbing the back of his head and grinning. "Well, I guess you know about me more than you'd ever like to, huh?"

"It's cool," I replied with a grin of my own. My worries about being friendless this year were completely shattered; Mike was very likeable. "I hate doing all the talking anyhow."

"That Edward," Mike said, a serious looking coming into his eyes, "doesn't know what he's missing. Don't let him bother you, okay? If he does, I'll have to beat the crap out of him."

My spirits were quite suddenly lifted as Mike winked at me and headed off to the boy's locker room. The rest of class went by smoothly and without too much stress, even when I had to turn my yellow slip in to the teacher, have it signed and get stared at by various classmates as I sat on the sidelines while they were forced to do laps; even Mike glanced at me inquisitively. I busied myself with math homework-- the only kind of homework you actually get on the first day-- and decided to be productive instead of wasting my time doodling and daydreaming like usual. When the last bell of the day rang, I tripped down the bleachers and out the door before Mike could find me… I knew there would be questions, and I didn't have the time or inclination to answer them.

I walked to the office, glad that the rain has eased up into a fine mist. As I walked up the steps and into the building, I slammed into a student coming out the door. I apologized rapidly, then froze as a low growl reached my ears. Edward Cullen glared at me from the doorway, and I realized with a stab of panic that the almost animistic noise was coming from his throat. I shrunk back as far as I could without falling backwards down the stairs.

"S-sorry," I whispered again, my voice trembling.

Without a word, he pushed past me and headed off towards the parking lot. I hurried into the building, surprised that I was actually shaking. My hand

The woman at the counter, the same woman from this morning, smiled at me as she took the slip. "The weather here must be so different than what you're used to," she said, obviously mistaking my terror for being cold. "How was your first day?"

"Fine," I mumbled. "Small classes."

She nodded. "Which reminds me… You can't switch classes unless you fill out a form. Some students," her eyes flickered briefly to the door, "try to get around it by sweet-talking us, but rules are the rules."

I was stunned. "Edward Cullen tried to switch classes?"

"Biology II. Don't tell me you want to switch, too? Like I told him, there really isn't any other option for that period. Other classes are full."

I shook my head, exchanged a few more pleasantries and then left to wait for my father. It was impossible that Edward Cullen would be switching class to avoid me, yet it was the first thing that immediately came to mind. I sat on the bench by the office, resting my cheek in one hand and drumming my fingers on the cement with the other. Perhaps it wasn't me after all, I thought as I saw my father's cruiser in the distance. I would have to ask Charlie if he'd ever had issues with the Cullens; maybe Edward knew of my father and had gotten in trouble before. That would explain why no one wanted to talk about them…

I scrambled into Charlie's car the moment he pulled up, hoping to get out of there as fast and with as few people seeing me as possible. I leaned back against the seat with a sigh, buckling my seat-belt and rubbing my eyes.

"Long day?" Charlie asked, pulling out of the parking lot and heading towards the house.

"Something like that," I sighed. I paused a moment; I should wait until later to ask, when my father had more time, but I wanted to test the waters a bit. "I have good classes, and some of the students are really nice. But there's one kid who had a downright nasty attitude… he was being completely rude."

Charlie made a small noise. "They were bad, huh? That's strange. I've never had any trouble with most of the kids there. Some of them have had the odd speeding ticket, and there have always been a few kids who weren't the best of people or families from out of town that move here and aren't always model citizens, but most of them come from very respectable, hard working families and are well-behaved."

Well, there went that theory.

"Oh. Maybe Edward was just having a bad day, then."

He glanced at me for a fraction of a second; I could see it out of the corner of my eyes. "Edward Cullen?"

… Or not.

"Yeah, why?" I asked as casually as possible. "Are they one of the out of town families that gives you trouble?"

"Ah, well," Charlie hesitated. "The Cullens moved here two years ago. Their father is a good man and an excellent doctor. There's just a lot of town gossip is all… Edward Cullen hasn't ever been in trouble here. All the same, maybe you're better off sticking to people who are a little more… friendly. I want to see you happy this year."

I looked out the window and into the thick forest surrounding our home. A small chill went up my back, much like the one during lunch. My father said that Edward hadn't gotten into trouble, so what was it that had caused his odd behavior? No, scratch that. Charlie said Edward hadn't caused trouble _here_ , in Forks. They'd lived somewhere else two years ago. I knew from personal experience that a family didn't just up and move to a place like this in the middle of the school year. I would have inquired further, but we were pulling up to the house and the look on Charlie's face told me he was lost in his thoughts… not the best time to press for information. I would have to wait.

Grabbing my backpack, I let myself in as Charlie went back to work, heading upstairs to take a shower and finish my math. All I could wonder was what exactly I had gotten myself into.

* * * * *

The next day was better than the first, in many ways.

For the first half of the night, I'd lain awake and tried to ignore the rain outside; how anyone was supposed to sleep with that, I'd never know. Somewhere between one o'clock in the morning when I finally fell asleep and seven o'clock when I woke up, the storming had miraculously ceased. The wind had all but disappeared and the rain was minimal, even though the dark clouds constantly overhead still threatened a deluge at any moment.

I had taken my spot in the back row of English class, and Erin once again sat next to me. Mike, who gave Erin a somewhat apprehensive glance, seemed content to sit in the spot in front of me, eventually twisting around in his seat and complimenting me on my scrawly, illegible handwriting… of all things. He looked pleased when Erin and I both included him in our morning chatter, and I was relieved that Erin was indifferent to Mike's off-the-wall attempts at flirting.

The three of us walked together to my Government class, which was proving to be more interesting than I had suspected, and I somehow avoided getting called on in both Geometry and Spanish class. Jessica walked with me to lunch like yesterday, and patted me on the back when my face drained of color like yesterday; little did she know that it was for an entirely different reason. While I was anxious over having to stand in that crowded line, I was more anxious that Edward Cullen would be in that crowd. It was an utterly irrational fear-- I had done nothing gravely wrong, he was obviously just unsocial and probably was irritated with people staring at him. I could sympathize. And yet…

But Edward Cullen was also why the day was worse than yesterday. I didn't run into him in the line, I didn't manage to trip over him or offend him any further. I didn't have the chance; he wasn't anywhere in sight. There were only four figures at the Cullen's table, all looking vaguely morose. I ate my usual almost-healthy salad in silence, listening to Mike and another boy banter about football and trying my best to follow the conversation if only to have a distraction.

"Hey, Bella?" Angela asked quietly, tugging lightly on my sleeve. "I need to go to Biology early. Can you come with me?"

I leaped at the chance to escape from the buzzing, crowded room. "Sure."

We dumped our trays, said our goodbyes and headed off. Angela nervously brushed back her hair with one hand, and I could feel a strange uneasiness between us. She fidgeted the entire way to the classroom; once we got inside, she set her stuff down and glanced about. We were alone, and I was sure that was the point.

"What's the matter, Angela?"

Angela looked at the floor, sitting down in her seat and folding her hands in her lap. Her knuckles were white. "Can I ask you something?"

I sat in the chair next to her. "Of course."

She bit her lip. "If… if, theoretically, there was something about one of our classmates… If there was a rumor about them, would you want to know? I mean, it's just a rumor of course, but…"

"Is this about Edward Cullen?" I asked, my entire body suddenly going tense. "Angela, if there's something you think I should know, then just tell me."

"Well… The Cullens came here from Alaska two years ago, very suddenly. It was in the middle of the school year and everything. Then this cop from Alaska came down here and worked with your dad for a while… There was this girl, her name was Amelia Lancaster. I guess she hung around with the Cullens. I guess one day the Cullens went out camping and she came along… Emmett Cullen and Rosalie Hale went out hiking, and then they heard screaming and came back. I guess a mountain lion had made it's way into camp, and…" Angela trailed off, wringing her hands.

I tried to swallow; my mouth was too dry. "And?"

"And… when the authorities got to the scene, Amelia was missing. They couldn't find her body and eventually said that she'd been mauled by a mountain lion or fell off a cliff or something. But the weird part was that Edward was missing, and Jasper Hale was, too. Alice Cullen said Edward had been upset and Jasper had taken him somewhere else to calm down. They never did find the mountain lion. They didn't even find paw prints."

"…Oh," I finally managed to say. I wrapped my arms around myself; the room felt colder.

"I don't know what the cop and your dad talked about, but rumor has it that the Alaskan police were investigating Edward Cullen for some reason…"

"They thought he killed her?"

"No one knows, and that's why Mike doesn't like us talking about it. He says it's mean to talk about people behind their backs like that. But you weren't here when the Cullens came, so…That's why people tend to be so jumpy around them," she took a breath and looked up at me with a faint smile. "I'm sure it's nothing. People like to make stories. I bet the cop was just finishing up some paperwork or something. He left a few days later."

I opened my mouth to reply, but just then the teacher came in. "Thanks for letting me know," I said. There were so many questions I wanted to ask, but as the bell rang and students began to file in, I knew I'd have to wait until another time. I went to my seat and grabbed my textbook out of my backpack, my head spinning.

"Hey, Bella!" Mike greeted cheerfully as he bounced through the door. "Guess what?"

He began to prattle on about a trip he was planning to take to La Push on Halloween. I nodded at all the appropriate places, smiled politely and said I would think about going… but I was somewhere else mentally, and I barely heard a word he said. I felt guilty for not being more enthusiastic; I should have been paying attention instead of glancing at the door, wondering if Edward would walk in. Still, Mike looked satisfied as the teacher called the class to order and he took his place next to Angela-- I wondered what exactly I'd agreed to while I was spacing out.

The rest of Biology class was spent reading about cells. Edward Cullen never showed up, and with everyone reading, the silence that fell over the room felt eerie. Mike nearly got in trouble for flirting with the girl at the next table, which he complained about the entire way to gym class; I offered him my sympathy, even if he'd brought it on himself. Once we were inside the gym, I took my place in the bleachers and got out my English homework, a few simple questions on a reading assignment. Everyone else started their warm-ups and eventually the teacher began to explain the rules of volleyball.

I watched for a moment, feeling a glimmer of sadness rise in the back of my mind. The game sounded fun-- I remembered seeing people play it in Phoenix. I wished I could have joined them, but I knew that if I got stressed and hyperventilated, I could have an attack… And that was the last thing I wanted. As much as I wanted to be down there with the others, I wasn't like them and it was for my own good-- as well as for the good of everyone else, as clumsy as I was-- that I stayed out of it instead of risking a seizure.

Although I couldn't play sports, I wasn't without any talent. During the first year or so after my accident, I spent time exploring things I could do; aside from photography and gardening, I had learned that I was a decent cook. My mother at least knew how to cook an egg, but much to my dismay, I had learned that Charlie could barely do that much. Once I was done with English, I brought out a sheet of notebook paper and began to make a list of things needed from the store. Anything to keep my mind busy. It would be nice to fill up the cupboard and fridge with decent food and teach Charlie how to actually make himself something besides microwave dinners…

Mike waved at me as class let out; he was running off with another blond guy and without a doubt it had something to do with football. I waved back, smiling and heading towards the front of the school. Since it still wasn't raining, I took advantage of the 'good' weather and walked slower than normal. I was halfway between the gym and the main building when the four Cullens walked out from the school, crossed my path about four yards away and piled into a flashy, brand-new silver Volvo. I kept walking, though I felt slightly surprised; the only time I'd seen cars like that was when the rich yuppies all got their kids one. Despite the way they dressed, the Cullens obviously had money… not to mention looks. It was curious that they kept to themselves when they could easily have people bowing at their feet.

My mind wandered back to what Angela had said in Biology. Maybe not so curious…

I stopped and glanced over my shoulder. The driver of the Volvo, the smaller female named Alice, was watching me in the car mirror. No, I thought to myself with scorn, she wasn't watching me. It didn't make sense. Even so, I couldn't resist the shiver that ran through my body. I turned back around and walked a bit faster.


	5. Chapter Four

By the time that my dad and I came home, I was more than a little exasperated… but at least Charlie finally had an idea of what counted as actual 'food'. We had gone shopping at the local store and purchased a good, double-digit money's worth of bread, fruit and vegetables and a bit of lean beef. I had also snagged a few bags of dried beans and a pint of ice cream… which my father pretended not to see, the good man that he was, and I hid it in the far back of the freezer the moment he wasn't looking. Just because he pretended not to see it didn't mean he wouldn't try and eat it. Hopefully he was too lazy or tired to bother digging.

I went upstairs to take a shower as Charlie left again, relaxing happily into the boiling hot water and not coming out until it started to go cold. I slipped on my nightly uniform of pajama bottoms and t-shirt, wandering into my bedroom and turning on the computer. My math homework required more know-how than I had on my own; hopefully the internet would give me access to people smarter than myself. The tower whirred and made a clunk noise… for a moment, I worried that it would implode or set itself on fire. Finally the screen lit up and the system booted.

Sinking into the wooden writing chair, I finally managed to access the internet after a brief battle with an expired anti-virus program and a swarm of pop-up ads. My first stop was my e-mail account; the promise I'd made to my mother chose to re-emerge from my memory, and I cursed to myself when I noticed at least thirty messages in my inbox. Luckily, they weren't all from my mother-- a good chunk of it had titles imploring me to try this or that product, call this or that number to claim my million-dollar lottery winnings, become a lean muscle goddess in thirty days… and a few newsletters from my mother's church, which I deleted along with the spam. I ignored the twinge of guilt and focused on the remaining handful of messages, the majority of them sent today and within the last few hours.

The first was long and rambling. My mother talked about how she was getting used to the internet and how the at-home work was coming along. She was getting ready to move around with Phil, was excited and missed me, followed by her typical, motherly worrying streak. Said streak continued into the next message and the next, each message getting more and more irritable until the last one threatened a phone call to my father unless I replied soon. I sighed, hitting reply and typing as quickly as I could.

_Dear mom,_

_Sorry I didn't reply sooner. I forgot. You know how that is, though. School has been okay, nothing really interesting has happened. There's a cute boy in two of my classes and he flirts with me, but he flirts with all the girls so I wouldn't get your hopes up of having grandkids anytime soon. I made a few other friends, and I'm actually happy here. Please say hello to Phil for me, and try to not panic if I don't reply to your messages right away, okay?_

_Love you,_

_Bella_

I moved on to the last message, one from my therapist back in Phoenix. She was wondering how I was doing, and wanted to know if checking in with her one per month over the internet would be good for me. My fingers hovered over the keys as contemplated what I had written to my mother in the previous message. Although I had told my mother nothing interesting had happened and that I was happy, it wasn't quite the truth… and though I knew my therapist wouldn't say anything to my mother, I hesitated a moment before I started typing out my reply.

_Dear Nora,_

_I can call you once per month, sure. Everything is… interesting. I told my mother that I was happy, but I'm not really. I miss Arizona. The cold here is starting to get to my knee a little. I feel bad for making Charlie drive me around. I wish I didn't have this stupid epilepsy. I've been having twitches in the morning, I hope my medication isn't acting up. I always worry about that. I worry about everything, but you know that. Like there's the boy in my class, he just glared at me like I was the devil on the first day of school, tried to change classes and everything. My new friend Angela said he might have gotten in trouble back where he came from, and I… Well, it creeps me out a bit, but he is very attractive._

I scowled, and deleted the last line.

_Well, it creeps me out a bit. I'm sure it's just a rumor though. Anyhow, that's life in Forks. I'm bored out of my mind otherwise, but at least I brought books. Also, I'm teaching Charlie to cook. Wish me luck. I hope you're doing well, and thanks for messaging me._

_Take care,_

_Bella_

With a sigh, I hit send and looked at the clock. Charlie would be home soon, and I hadn't bothered making anything for dinner yet. I stood up, stretched and headed downstairs to the kitchen. I grabbed a phone-book and found the nearest pizza place, called and ordered a delivery. Rather than go back upstairs and focus on math, I grabbed my Government reading assignment and flopped on the couch in the living room. By the time I was finished, Charlie had come home and the pizza was likely not far behind.

"Hey, Isabella," Charlie greeted as he walked in, shrugging off his jacket and holster; he slipped the gun into its usual spot, the top of a bookcase near the television set. "Doing homework?"

"I'm almost finished," I replied, setting down my Spanish homework and ignoring his use of my full name. "Did you have a good day at work?"

Charlie wandered into the living room and sat next to me, flicking on the television. "It was a slow day. There were just a few speeding tickets and someone's pet chickens got loose on the other side of town. How did school go?"

I didn't answer immediately, watching the television screen for a few seconds. "Uhm… well. It was certainly something."

"Oh?"

"There's this girl in my Biology class, Angela," I started. Would it be wise to bring up the Cullens again? Likely not, but the curiosity stirred by this entire affair would never leave me alone unless I figured it all out. "She and I had a talk today before class. Does the name Amelia Lancaster sound familiar to you?"

My father fell silent. "Yes, that name does ring a bell," he finally answered. "But I'm surprised Angela Weber of all people would be the one to bring that incident up. She's not the gossipy type."

"What incident?"

"The Cullens went out to hunt out of season, and Edward Cullen brought his girlfriend along. She was alone with them at the camp and a mountain lion attacked her. They tried to fight it off but it was too late. That's it. The officials couldn't find the animal so the town's people started some sort of outlandish rumor that Edward Cullen was hiding something, and they moved here to get away from that sort of talk."

I looked at my hands, twiddling my thumbs as I digested the new information. "I thought someone said a cop came here from Alaska…"

Charlie looked baffled. "No cop ever came here from Alaska. Something did come in the mail about some investigator coming down to talk to the Cullens, but no one ever showed and paperwork came in later about them being fined for the illegal hunting. It was never brought up after that, and the Cullens have been on their best behavior… hunting season or no."

There came a knock at the door, and I hopped up and ran to get it. I opened the door, accepted the pizza from the delivery guy and paid him a sizable tip for the insane task of driving to Forks. I rushed the pizza into the kitchen and set it on the counter, getting out a couple plates.

"You ordered pizza?" Charlie said with a hopeful tone, following me into the kitchen and peering at the extra large pepperoni and pineapple pie. "You didn't have to pay for it yourself…"

I dropped a giant slice onto his plate. "It's okay. You've been taking time to haul me to school and stuff, so it's the least I can do. Besides, it gives you one last night of reprieve before I subject you to my cooking."

"May the powers that be help us all," he said from around a mouthful of food.

I threw a piece of crust at my father. I washed both of our dishes after we were done, got my homework from the living room and went back upstairs to wrap up my Spanish and start on my Geometry. I tried to find help online, but the computer froze half-way through the loading of a page and I flicked off the power switch in annoyance. I would have to figure it out myself; I refused to ask poor Charlie for help.

As I worked on the problems, I actually became grateful for the formulas, figures and the repetitive, boring routineness of the subject. Although I wanted to throw the book across the room and never hear the words 'rectangular prism' ever again, it at least kept Edward Cullen and the mystery surrounding his family safely tucked away on the fringes of my thoughts instead of right smack dab in the middle. Once I'd solved the last problem, I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth, said goodnight to Charlie and headed for bed.

The wind and rain were less noisy than the nights before, and I found myself wondering if I was somehow getting used to the weather already. I closed my eyes, snuggling down into my pillow and relaxing. Edward Cullen slowly crept back into my thoughts, but figures and formulas still danced through my head, keeping him at bay. With a smile on my face, I fell into the first deep, peaceful sleep I'd had in days.

* * * * *

The rest of the week was spent getting to know people's names, getting used to the fact that I was now part of an actual social circle… and getting used to the fact that, like always, some people within that social would rather I not be there. While a good deal of the people in my classes and at Jessica's lunch table were at least civil with me, there were a few that either disliked me for one reason or another, or had gotten in trouble with my father and decided I was easier to hold a grudge against. It was one of those sad facts of life.

By Friday, things were running fairly smooth. I found out that Erin lived down the street from Charlie's house and he had, with my father's blessing, offered to give me rides to school. It was a decent situation for us all-- Charlie didn't have to lug me around, I didn't have to go to school in a police cruiser and Erin had someone to yammer his head off to for a good fifteen minutes every morning. Surprisingly enough, I didn't mind that last bit as much as I thought I would. Only Erin could make chess sound interesting.

English class was as easy as I'd hoped, but was thankfully different enough from the classes back in Phoenix that I wasn't bored. Mike and Erin still did the usual male glare-contest when talking… or at least Mike did. Erin was oblivious to the dominance displays, and even more oblivious to Mike's attempts to flirt with me. I was less oblivious, but chose to ignore it. Luckily, by Friday, Mike's attempts had all but ceased and were focused on Jessica instead. Jessica didn't seem to mind at all, and our walks to the cafeteria were filled with her gushing over the attentions. Apparently, she'd been crushing on Mike since middle school and he was finally showing some sort of interest in her.

And speaking of the cafeteria, I had started to learn the names of everyone who I sat with at lunch, even if they didn't talk to me. And even though I still had to remember to relax and breathe when wandering through the lunchtime crowds, I was getting better at not panicking; as long as I stuck with Jessica or Angela, preferably both, I didn't feel the pressing desire to throw up. At least, not until I glanced over at the Cullen's table and only counter four sitting there… Edward was gone the entire week, neither at lunch nor in Biology class. I was growing used to the fact that the enigmatic boy was absent, yet I kept reflecting on Edward Cullen and our brief interactions. No one had said anything about him since I talked to Angela on Tuesday, but all in all I refused to complain-- it's not like I wanted him there, shooting death glares in my general direction for whom only knows what reasons.

Biology class itself wasn't bad. I managed to get to class early that Wednesday to talk with the teacher about the dissection labs, using the excuse of religious reasons that I didn't even have. Angela seemed proud of me; apparently she was a vegetarian and approved of my squeamishness. Mike didn't understand the big deal and got into an argument with Angela over it, the first and only time I had seen her actually raise her voice above her usual, quiet murmur. I decided to never, ever make her angry.

Mike had decided to visit with me in gym class during volleyball rest breaks. We tossed the ball back and forth a bit, talking about football teams that I had barely even heard of, and about the often hilarious incidents at his father's sporting goods store. He never asked me why I was permanently stuck as an observer instead of being out on the floor with the rest of them, and I was grateful. When he was called back to the game, I would return to my homework until the end of class, wave my farewell to Mike and head out to meet with Erin for my ride home.

On Saturday, Angela called to see if I wanted to go to the library to do research on a biology assignment. Charlie was working and I had finished my homework thanks to the power of the internet, slow as it was, so I agreed. She picked me up an hour later and we made our way to the tiny Forks Public Library. I wasn't terribly surprised at the narrow selection, but it was still a bit of a disappointment. They did have one set of the entire Harry Potter series though, and after getting a library card, I checked them out.

"I wonder if my English teacher will let me rip apart the obscure mythology in Order of the Phoenix for extra credit," I joked, flopping down at one of the library's tables with Angela.

She smiled. "Did you find anything else?"

I shook my head. "I ordered for some Anne Rice novels, and a couple of books on photography. The guy at the counter said it's going to take at least two weeks to come in. Thank Mister Davis for his giant packets on the feeding cycle of the amoeba, I don't know what I'd do without them."

After a bit more pawing around the library, we got to work on our separate assignments. I helped her with the Biology, and she helped me with my Geometry; within a short hour and a half, we were both done with our work, had found all the books we wanted and were driving back to Charlie's house. I made a promise to myself that I would somehow get an excuse to escape Forks for a day and go out in search of an actual bookstore. Maybe I would wait and ask Angela or Erin the next time either of them were heading out of town… They both seemed more interested in reading for pleasure than Jessica or Mike.

"Thanks for the ride," I said to my friend as she pulled up to the curb. The rain had started up again, and I was unfortunately caught without a jacket. "And for the math help."

"No problem. Have a good night."

I shut the door, she drove away and I was once again left to my own devices. I choose to watch some sort of sappy movie on television until Charlie came home; we reheated the pizza that was left and had that for dinner. Despite the returning stormy weather I managed to sleep peacefully, and the next day I felt rested enough to try and clean while Charlie worked. I vacuumed the bottom rooms and mopped the kitchen before I tired out, but after a few hours worth of reading and relaxing in the living room with one of my new books, I managed to prepare a lasagna and get it in the oven. I ran upstairs to take a shower while it cooked, and to check in with my mother via e-mail.

There was only one message from her this time, nothing from my therapist and plenty of spam. There was another newsletter from my mother's church… I sighed, letting it be. Maybe I would read it later. I typed out a reply to my mother, who seemed calmer but was still worried about me; I told her about my new friends, and though I admitted to being a bit homesick due in part to the constant rain, I confirmed that I was, in fact, okay. Once that was done, I was back downstairs to check on dinner.

Charlie came home a while later, eying the pan as if there might be something sinister hiding underneath the pile of cheese, noodles and tomato sauce. It seemed that after all these years, he still remembered my mother's sometimes eccentric cooking; I couldn't blame him for being a bit wary. As good as she had been at times, some combinations should just not be put together.

"You were busy today," he noted, turning his attention to the sparkling linoleum floors and giving them an approving look. "Should I get used to this sort of treatment?"

I grinned, grabbing my plate and perching on my chair in the corner. "Don't get your hopes up."

"Thought not. Hey, this is actually good…"

After dinner I washed the dishes, still bursting with pride from the compliments I'd gotten from my father on the cooking. The rest of the night was spent getting a few assignments ahead in Government and Spanish class, followed by a delightful eight hours of uninterrupted sleep. I was moderately cheerful when Erin picked me up Monday morning despite the frigid cold that has set in overnight, actually participating in his usually one-sided conversations, and I gave Mike my phone number in English when he complained about getting a low score on the pop quiz our teacher sprang on us. My good mood was dampened slightly as we stepped outside after class was over; tiny white flakes were falling from the sky and swirling about on the ground.

I stared at the stuff. "Is that… snow?"

"Don't tell me you've never seen snow before," Mike said with alarm.

"No, no. I've seen snow. We used to go to visit my aunt in Santa Fe during ski season when I was little. But… isn't it a little, uh…early?"

Erin shifted his books onto one arm, offering out the other for me to grab a hold of as I gingerly walked across the increasingly slippery ground. "It's been a cold year. Usually we're not getting snow until near the end of the year, but sometimes we'll get some weather front down from Canada or something and we'll get an early snow storm or two before winter officially sets in."

I was grateful for his arm; I could barely walk right when the surface I was walking on had decent traction. "So… this is going to go away?"

Mike let out a grumbling noise, and it was difficult to tell if it was because of the weather or because of Erin. "It had better. I want to go to the beach for Halloween, and if it snows, I swear…"

I got to my Government class in one piece, and though it was still snowing when I made my way to Geometry, I manage to not fall flat on my face then, either. I waved to people I recognized from lunch in the halls, dancing inside at the fact that things were actually looking up… it was something that never would have happened in Phoenix. Edward Cullen was the farthest thing from my mind when I walked into the lunchroom with Jessica and Angela, but I felt a wave of cold rush over me when my eyes looked across the room and counted five people at that secluded table. He was back.

"Bella? Are you okay?"

I looked over at Jessica, feeling the color drain from my face. "Uhm… You know, you two go on ahead. I don't feel so well, I'll just head over to the table."

Mike gave me a concerned glance as he approached the table with his lunch. "Wow. Are you sick? You're shaking."

"I'm just a little queasy is all. It should go away here soon."

"Do you need me to call someone?" Erin asked quietly, an underlying meaning to his words. He thought I was going to have a seizure. "I could take you to the office."

"I swear, I'm okay," I assured him. "I don't know exactly what's up, but it's probably just the weather or something."

While my knee was aching, I knew the weather had nothing to do with it. I had managed to forget all about Edward Cullen, but the minute I saw him, it felt like all something inside me had wanted to run and hide. What was the matter with me? The only time I'd ever felt like that was before a dance recital, or when people tried to get me to ride a roller coaster at theme parks… It felt as if my entire stomach had flipped a few times. I glanced over at the Cullen table, my heart pounding as I looked them over; why did they affect me so strongly?

"Maybe Edward's put a spell on Bella," Jessica suddenly piped up, coming back with Angela from the lunch line.

I blushed. "Jessica!"

"Well, you are always looking at him. But hey, can't really blame you there. Most of the school fawned over him for a while. And seriously, he's staring at you."

My heart moved up into my throat. "What?" I hissed, then glanced back over to where the Cullens sat. Sure enough, Edward was staring at me with a curious expression. The open hostility from before was gone, yet this only caused my heart to flutter more. "Oh, for crying out loud, Jessica. Don't stare back, he might come over here and bite us."

I finally convinced Jessica to not bring Edward up again; it was bad enough for my blood pressure by being in the same room with him without her continually bringing him into our conversation. I shifted the topic towards everyone's favorite foods, which seemed a safe enough topic until my acrobatic stomach started growling; in my panic, I had missed out on getting lunch. Luckily, Angela offered up half of her grilled cheese sandwich and both Mike and Erin contributed some fries to the impromptu Feed the Bella campaign.

"Maybe you need a break from school, new girl," Mike teased. "I'm planning to skip after lunch and go enjoy the weather. Who wants to come with?"

"I'll go," Jessica smiled brightly at Mike, and he returned the smile, obviously smitten. "What about you, Bella?"

"Sounds great, but I think I'll stay," I said. No way was I going to leave school now that Edward was back. I wanted to see if things were still the same as they were before. "I don't think it'd be a good idea for me to skip classes."

Mike grimaced. "Oh, right. Your father's the Chief. He'd probably skin you alive if he caught you."

I grinned. "Actually, he'd probably congratulate me on finally getting a social life. I just don't want to get behind is all… I uh, had some problems with that back in Phoenix."

Jessica patted me on the leg. "It's okay. You can come with us some other time."

The bell rang, and we all headed off our separate ways. Angela had stayed behind, so we walked together to Biology like usual. Each step closer caused my heart to beat faster, and I found myself struggling to find a distraction from the thought of sitting next to Edward for the first time in days. I glanced up at the giant, white clouds, and got rewarded by a raindrop to the eye.

"It's raining. I guess it's too warm for snow."

Angela let out a sigh. "Well, at least until tonight. I hope we don't get freezing rain. My dad is a logger," that last word was said with more than a bit of vitriol, "and I don't want him to get hurt out there. I wish he'd work for the new prison like a lot of the others are doing."

"I'm sure it'll be fine," I replied, even though I had no idea about the fall and winter weather of Forks. I had only visited there in the summer, and even then it seemed like it was too cold. "Today was probably just a fluke."

She looked doubtful, but didn't openly disagree. We got to Biology class before anyone else, like usual, and turned our work in. I sat down at my table, rubbing my hands as my thumb began to twitch. Rather than get worked up again, I grabbed my notebook and began to randomly doodle; I was better with a camera than I was with pen and paper, but at least I could draw something that looked vaguely like a pony. I kept my eyes to my paper as students started coming in, especially as a certain someone sat in the seat next to me.

"Nice cow."

I froze at the smooth, unfamiliar voice. "It's a pony," I muttered, refusing to look up. Refusing to believe that Sir Mysterious was actually talking to me.

Whether or not Edward heard me was questionable, as the teacher called class to order that very moment and it didn't give him a chance to reply. I moved from drawing to taking notes as the teacher lectured about the food chain, as he had yesterday; it was stuff I'm sure I'd covered in science classes before, but seeing as how I had the memory of a fruit fly, I wrote it all down anyhow. As the teacher began talking about the balances in nature and the relationships between predator and prey, I felt eyes on me and glanced over at Edward. I immediately looked away the second it registered that he was, in fact, looking at me. I felt like an idiot-- here I wanted to check and see if maybe I'd been imagining his bad mood that first day or something, and now I couldn't even look at him without wanting to fall over. It was pathetic.

"So for this assignment," the teacher concluded, "I'd like for you to work with your partner and…"

I looked up and stared at the teacher in disbelief. My partner was a guy who looked like he wanted to maim me last week, and now suddenly I was supposed to work with him? I closed my eyes and rubbed the bridge of my nose as the teacher handed out the worksheet. Chill, I though to myself as I opened my eyes again. It was just a few questions on one little chapter. Nothing to get worked up over…

A pale hand reached over and gently plucked the worksheet form my side of the table. "You're Bella Swanson, right?" Edward asked, his pen already scribbling my name on the paper before I could reply.

I stifled a sigh. "The one and only."

"I thought so. I'm Edward--"

"-- Cullen," I cut in, taken aback by the slightly cutting edge to my own tone. "I've heard about you."

He sounded amused. "I'm flattered."

I dared to look directly at him, his smug tone striking an irritated nerve in me. "Don't be. It wasn't all good."

Edward paused in his writing, meeting my gaze. I nearly had a heart attack right then and there; his eyes, not the flat black I'd thought I'd seen the first day of school, were a bright, striking gold.

"And I," he replied with a neutral expression, "wouldn't have it any other way."

I wanted to reply, but I couldn't. I would have been satisfied with simply being able to look away and focus on our work, but I couldn't seem to do that, either. Something in those amber eyes held me, and only when Edward looked away himself did I feel released from that power. I turned my attention to my textbook, and for the rest of the class I busied myself with throwing out short, simple replies to the questions on the worksheet while Edward wrote them down.

We were among the first ones done, and Edward turned in the paper to the teacher. He didn't say anything else to me, and it gave me plenty of time to pull out my copy of Macbeth… my newest English assignment… and get started on the first required reading of the trimester. I was in the middle of Act I when people started getting packed up, and I stood up to get ready to go as well. I avoided looking at Edward, or at least I tried; I accidentally dropped my book while attempting to put it into my backpack, and I suddenly found it being offered back to me before I could even attempt to lean over and get it myself.

I glanced at Edward and gingerly accepted the book from him. "Thanks."

He flashed me the most brilliant, wondrous smile I had ever seen, and I felt as if I was a fish and someone had just shoved an electric cattle prod into my tank. "You're welcome."

I was too stunned to say much else, and I was out the door before the bell could even finish ringing, my heart thumping madly in my chest as I scurried towards gym. I didn't bother waiting for Angela or Mike-- I would have to apologize to them later. I felt very much like the fleeing deer from the Biology lecture today, especially as I walked to gym class and felt those eyes on me all the while.


	6. Chapter Five

Contrary to my assertion to Angela that everything would be fine, Mother Nature had decided to prove me wrong. I opened the door to the house and peered out into the icy, foggy morning light with a long, heavy sigh. The freezing rain had covered the entire town in a nice, inch-thick layer of shiny, slippery doom. I shut the door, sighed again and seriously considered going back to bed. Instead, I trudged into the kitchen to make myself some breakfast like usual.

Chewing on a slice of toast, I picked up the phone and called Erin. "Hey, did you look outside?"

The boy sounded abnormally cranky. "Yeah, I saw the mess. I've got my chains on though and I'm still going to school. Want me to pick you up?"

"Yep. See you in a few."

I hung up and finished my breakfast with a shot of orange juice, gathering my things and waiting outside on the steps for Erin to arrive. Once he pulled up, I skidded my way over to his car… only falling on my tush once, I'm proud to say… and threw myself into the passenger seat.

"Are you okay?" Erin asked, as per usual.

"Never been better," I wheezed, rubbing my knee and willing away the stiffness in the achy joint. "Just cracked my spine, nothing I can't handle."

For a moment he looked at me as though I were serious, then apparently caught on to the joke and shook his head as he carefully made his way towards the school. "You and my sister both scare the crap out of me sometimes, I hope you know."

"Welcome to the insanity, Erin."

Insanity wasn't quite a strong enough word for it, as I was starting to believe; ever since yesterday, since speaking to Edward for the first time, it seemed like things had been entirely flipped upside down in my mind. I focused on chatting with Erin about World of Warcraft instead of thinking about getting to school and hopefully seeing Edward again. Maybe Jessica was right about the spell thing. It was strange, this sudden friendliness, and that smile…

"Bella?"

I snapped out of my thoughts, only to realize that we were at school and Erin was already out of the car. "Oh, sorry. I guess I was spacing out a little," I smiled sheepishly as I undid my seat belt and slowly made my way out onto the ice rink of a parking lot.

He frowned. "Are you sure that fall didn't shake you up?"

"Very sure," I confirmed. Erin grabbed my arm as I started to slide on another patch of ice. "Well, this is at least an interesting experience. I don't think I care much for winter here."

"Ready to go back to Phoenix yet?"

"Hah! You can't get rid of me that easily."

Erin grinned. "Good. You stir things up a bit around here… it's nice."

"Aw, well… Oh, crap," I suddenly cussed, patting myself down. "I dropped my stupid bracelet in your car. Can I borrow your keys a minute?"

"Sure. Do you want me to come back with you?"

"No, just go on to class. You're going to be late otherwise."

Erin glanced at the space between me and the car, then himself and the classroom. He muttered something, then dropped the keys into my hand. "Just be careful."

I smiled. "Of course."

He headed off towards English while I shuffled my way back to the car. After a few minutes of digging around in the center console of the car and along the floor, I found my bracelet. I straightened up, clicking it in place around my wrist and shutting the door. My attention was drawn across the parking lot; Edward Cullen was a few rows down, leaning on his car and staring back at me. I blinked, forcing myself to look away as the bell rang. I locked the car door and began my slow trek back to English class. Maybe if I wasn't too late…

The sound of screeching tires made me instinctively stop and look up. People always talk about things looking like they were in slow motion, their lives flashing before their eyes-- I have no idea where they got those ideas, because all I saw was a van skidding on the ice and coming towards me. I didn't even have time to scream. I was suddenly shoved backwards, the back of my head smacking against the ice. The last thing I saw before the blackness of unconsciousness took me were a pair of golden eyes.

* * * * *

Pain.

I opened my eyes, squinting in the horribly bright light. The light moved away, revealing another set of those amber hues. These were older, kinder… And attached to someone far more talkative than Edward.

"Welcome back, Miss Swanson. It seems you had a rather nasty little fall. Can you hear me?"

"Y… yeah," I said. My voice came out as a slurred mutter; I was so tired that I could barely move my lips. "What…"

"Don't try to talk, it's okay. I'm Doctor Cullen, and you're in the hospital. Tyler Crowly was trying to hurry and lost control of his vehicle. It nearly hit you, but you did fall on the ice and smack your head pretty good. You had a seizure, and you've been out for quite some time."

Cullen… Edward's father. I struggled to open my eyes, my memory coming back to me. "Edward. Is Edward okay?"

Doctor Cullen, sitting on the edge of my bed, was just as beautiful as the others… and gave me the same chill up my spine. He looked down at the clipboard, tinkering with the papers there. "Edward? Why do you ask?"

"He was there. He saved me."

The young looking man paused, then glanced at the giant, plastic clock up on the ivory white hospital wall. "I should go let your father know that you're awake. Try to rest some more."

Screw that, I thought with a low growl. I wiggled my twitching fingers, getting some feeling into them before I grabbed the cold, metal bars along the sides of my bed and forced myself into a sitting position. My vision swam for a moment, but eventually things became clearer and the usual nausea faded slightly. I looked at the clock myself; it was almost ten o'clock at night. I'd been blacked out for over twelve hours. I rubbed my right leg, pain shooting from the knee and up into my hip. Whatever had happened, it had left me with the worst arm spasms I'd had in months, a sore leg and a major headache.

But what had actually happened? I fought through the mental fog and tried to recall that morning. Erin had driven me to school… I had gone back for my medical bracelet. And Edward had been there, I was certain. I had seen him. But even so… He'd been rows over. There was no way he could have pushed me out of the way of that van, and even if he could have, he himself would have been hit. It was impossible, yet I knew what I'd seen. Those eyes were unmistakable, even if I hit my head. Somehow, Edward had gotten across that ice in a matter of seconds and had managed to stop that van from smashing us both. Whatever the reason, Doctor Cullen knew. That much was obvious.

As if summoned by my thoughts, the doctor opened the door and returned with my father. "You're sitting up! That's good," he smiled. I couldn't bring myself to return it, instead eyeing him with every once of suspicion I could muster; someone was going to tell me the truth around here. He blinked, then quickly turned to my father. "She'll be able to go home by now, for sure, we just wanted to keep her for observation. I suggest she stay home at least a couple days and recover."

"Alright, I'll be sure to keep an eye on her and let you know how things go. Thanks, Carlisle."

Charlie, full of fatherly concern, helped me get to my feet and handed me my clothes, politely waited behind the screen for me to get out of the hospital gown someone has dressed me in while sleeping. After dropping everything at least once, I finally managed to get myself decent. Luckily, Charlie had gotten me my slip-on shoes from my room at some point in the night, so I didn't have to battle with laces. He wrapped one arms around me as I teetered out the door and we headed to the front desk to check out. I refused a wheelchair; I would walk out of this place on my own two feet, or not at all.

As we headed towards the door, a figure in the waiting room caught my eye. I glanced at Edward Cullen as we walked by; he was completely unscathed. Our gazes met, but I kept walking. I wouldn't talk to him with my father there, but one of these days I would talk to him and he would tell me exactly what had happened.

"Are you okay?"

I tried to sound positive, but it was hard to sound positive when I also sounded half drunk from tiredness and whatever the hospital had given me for painkillers. "Don't worry, dad. A few more house of sleep and I'll be great."

Charlie didn't reply as he helped me into the cruiser. "You might have to talk to your mother when you get home," he said once he got into the driver's seat. "I called her from the hospital."

"Oh, no," I moaned. "She's going to freak out."

"Well, in her defense, you could have gotten seriously hurt if you hadn't run out of the way in time."

I paused. "Run out of the way in time? Wait, what?"

Charlie looked confused. "Doctor Cullen said you ran and slipped on the ice trying to get out of the way of the kid's van."

"Oh, that," I said lamely. Someone was lying somewhere, for sure. "Yeah, sorry, I'm out of it."

When we got to the house, there were at least two cars parked out front already. Erin, Jessica and Mike were all huddled out on the sidewalk and rushed over when Charlie helped me out of the car.

"Oh, we were so worried!" Jessica gasped as she came over and gave me careful hugs. "Erin was there when it happened and told Mike, and MIke called me and we waited at the hospital but they wouldn't let us in so we came and waited here and… And you're alive!"

"I am alive," I confirmed, giving Jessica hugs back. Erin had seen the accident? If he'd seen it, maybe he saw something. I glanced over at him; it was impossible to tell, with his neutral expression. "I think I'm just going to go to sleep, sorry to disappoint…"

Mike nodded. "We just wanted to make sure you weren't dead."

I smiled wryly. "Thanks."

"We'll call you and come visit tomorrow or something," Erin spoke up, and the other two nodded. "Get some rest."

"Goodnight, guys."

Charlie grabbed my arm to steady me as we went inside. He led me to the sofa, which had been made into a bed. The automan had been pushed close enough for someone to reach, and converted into a make-shift coffee table with a bad of Doritos, soda and the TV remote on it.

"I made you a little spot to rest while you were at the hospital so you didn't have to go upstairs," he mumbled. "They let me off work early when they heard what happened, so…"

My eyes got misty, and I sunk onto the sofa; it was surprisingly comfortable. "Thanks, dad. That's really nice of you."

"I'll go get you the phone so you can call Rene."

Talking to my mother proved just as tiring as anything else. She was practically hysterical, convinced I had been maimed and rendered limbless or some blasted thing. I finally calmed her down to the point where she was actually being reasonable and wasn't demanding my immediate return to Phoenix… despite the fact that she was currently in Florida with Phil. I started talking about how Jessica and the others were waiting for me and promised to visit. She seemed so surprised at the fact that I'd already made friends-- or made friends at all-- that she switched completely into a calmer tone and we chattered a bit about her new place in Florida with Phil instead of my near death experience.

Finally, my mother wrapped up the conversation, satisfied that I was alive and in one piece enough to leave in the hands of my father for a while longer. I set the phone down and flopped back against the pile of pillows my father had placed at the end of the sofa. Charlie came in a few minutes later with TV dinners, and we watched Deal or No Deal while eating. After gorging myself on my macaroni and cheese, root beer and a handful of Doritos, I curled up under the warm, fuzzy blanket and fell asleep.

It was like I was back at the school, on the ground. Edward was crouched over me, the van was right there, about to crush us. His arms suddenly snapped up, and the van smashed into it… yet it was the van which yielded, not Edward. No, his hand went into the metal, stopping the two ton hunk of steel and fiberglass like it was made out of air. The boy looked down at me, his face thoughtful.

"You look too much like her…" he whispered.

And then I opened my eyes, and I was back in my living room. I wiped the cold sweat from my forehead, looking at the clock on the VCR. It was three in the morning… I'd been asleep for only a few hours, yet I felt wide awake. The dream ran through my head over and over, and I wrapped the blanket around me as I began to shiver. It had seemed so real, like a memory rather than a dream…

I stared out into the darkness as my mind began to work its way around that idea. No, it couldn't have been a memory. I'd been passed out or something, or… Had I? The doctor had never seen _when_ I'd had the seizure. It could have been ten seconds after I'd hit my head or ten minutes... I didn't remember anything from between the fall onto the ice to waking up in the hospital. At least, I didn't consciously remember. There might have been some point in that timeline where I'd seen something or heard something… Something that didn't quite process itself at the time.

Easing myself off the sofa, I clung to the wall and slowly made my way into the kitchen. I got myself a glass of water, and dug a pen and a piece of paper from the catch-all drawer before returning to my temporary bed. I clicked on the little lamp next to the sofa and, using the back of my TV dinner carton, I began to write a letter.


	7. Chapter Six

Wednesday was a blur. After writing my letter to Edward, I had fallen back to sleep and dozed off and on all of that day. I only woke up once for any length of time… Naturally, when I smelled food. Charlie came in with a couple of white boxes and an envelope.

"Jessica brought us Chinese food," he chuckled, handing me a box with a large 'B' marked on it and the card. "Apparently she thinks I'm going to starve you."

I opened envelope and read the card.

_Dear Bella,_

_I know how horrible your dad's cooking is, so I brought you guys some actual food. Get better soon! Everyone else is planning to visit soon. Just to warn you, lmao._

_\- Jessica_

Fighting back a snicker, I tucked the card back in the envelope and hid it under my pillows. "Something like that, I guess."

I'd fallen asleep after scarfing down the vegetable lo mein and egg foo young, and awoke on Thursday feeling almost as good as I had the day I'd arrived in Forks. My head still pounded when I tried to move too quickly, but my vision was stable and I didn't feel like I'd been drugged anymore. I watched TV for most of the day and true to Jessica's word, everyone else decided to show up randomly throughout the rest of the week.

Mike came over after school, bringing a football helmet from his store and a get well card; I put on the helmet, and he took a picture with his cell phone. We talked about how he was getting better in English, and needed to do better in Biology in order to stay in sports. I suggested he talk to Erin, who was better in pretty much every class than either one of us; he agreed. Angela showed up later that night, a stack of my homework in hand and a smile on her face.

"Nice helmet," she laughed. "I see Mike's been by."

I accepted the homework without protest. "Yep, yesterday. Thanks for getting me my stuff from the office. At least someone is looking out for my academic success."

"No offense, but you need all the help with Geometry that you can get. Do you want me to stay and work on it with you?"

"I think I've got it, thank you for the offer though," I set my homework on the ottoman. I glanced at the letter I'd written to Edward, the small, yellow envelop tucked under the helmet. "Uhm… Angela, could you do me a favor tomorrow?"

"Sure. What is it?"

I picked up the letter and handed it to her. "Could you uhm… give that to Edward in Biology class? You're the only one I really trust with it."

Angela took it from me, glancing at it briefly before slipping it into her purse. "I'd be honored. I'll get it to him safe and sound."

"Thanks," I said, walking Angela to the door. "For everything, I mean. You're a great friend."

She beamed, waved goodbye and headed towards her car. I went back to the sofa and started to work on four day's worth of who knew what. Friday, Saturday and Sunday morning revolved around that, instant ramen and bad movies on television. I cleaned the living room Sunday afternoon and moved back up to my room, followed by an hour-long shower to scrub away nearly a week's worth of grime. My hair was a disaster, and I had just finished getting it detangled when there was a knock at the door. Charlie had gone back to work, so I hobbled downstairs and peered outside. I opened the door once I saw it was Erin, inviting him in.

He gave me a hug. "You look good."

"Should have seen me a couple hours ago. I could have been a body double for the Creature from the Black Lagoon."

"Bah. Sorry I couldn't get here sooner," he said, handing me a little teddy bear. "I figured the others would have worn you out. I take it you're feeling better?"

I sighed at Erin's question. "Not really," I said honestly. Everyone had been asking the question so much that I was finally willing to accept the fact that everything was not fine. "I mean, better than I was, but in general? I've been sleeping for crap, it's cold, Doctor Cullen's son is an ass and I almost got run over."

Erin walked with me into the living room and flopped with me onto the sofa. "Do you want to talk about it?"

I looked down at the teddy bear, running my thumb over its little plastic nose. "It's just… I used to come and visit Forks all the time. My mom has epilepsy, like me, and when I was younger I didn't really know because she had medication by then. I would come here ever summer, and… Well. My mom bought be a car for my fourteenth birthday. It was an amazing car. Red Mustang. But…"

"…But?"

"It was maybe a month after I got it. I was out by myself… I knew I shouldn't have been, but I was… and I don't know what happened. The next thing I know, I'm waking up in a ditch with my car wrapped around a tree. I guess I'd had a seizure while driving. My leg was broken because the engine got pushed back up into the car, they said I was lucky it didn't take my leg off. I was so afraid of traveling anywhere and so busy with doctors that I pretty much stayed locked up in my room at my mom's house in Phoenix for three years. And then I come back here finally, and almost get squished… I feel like I just want to hide away and never come out."

Erin was quiet for a moment, then shook his head. "You can't do that. That sucks, what happened to you, but you can't give up. I mean, I can't imagine it happening to my sister… she found out when she was twelve, before she drove… But if you were my sister, I would be shoving you out the door and back into society."

I rubbed my eyes, tears stinging at them; there was no way I was going to cry in front of someone else. "I hate society."

"Trust me, so do I. Even so, you have to at least pretend to like it so you can get ahead. I know how hard it is to deal with, but you can't let it stop you from living life."

He was right. I knew he was right. Yet a stubborn voice in the back of my mind told me that he didn't know me, he couldn't know what my life was like and what I was still going through. I wasn't like everyone else… I couldn't just go right back to how things were, I was never going to be the person I was before the crash and life wasn't going to get better just because I wanted it to.

I sighed. "I guess I just need more time."

"Understandable. If it makes you feel any better, Tyler looks like he got mauled by a muskrat, his car is completely totaled and he is planning to beg your forgiveness on Monday by asking you to the homecoming dance."

"Oh god," I groaned. "He's probably worse off than I am, too…" I trailed off a moment, then looked up at Erin and hesitated a moment before continuing. "Jessica said you were there when that happened… Did you see it?"

The grin on Erin's face suddenly vanished. "I saw it. I was there when they loaded you up into the ambulance. Why?"

"Oh… Well, Doctor Cullen said that I'd had a seizure, and I was just wondering if anyone saw it. I mean, I just don't want people to… You know."

"If you did, then it must have been before I got there or in the ambulance. I'd ask Edward Cullen."

My mouth went dry. "Edward? Why?"

Erin glanced at the clock, and I could feel him growing uncomfortable. "He was there with you when everyone else got there, and went into the ambulance with you. Something about having a cell phone and calling your dad."

"Oh…" I shuffled my feet. "I didn't know."

"I hate to be short, but my mom was expecting me back in about ten minutes. I better get going."

We stood up and walked to the door. "Thanks for dropping by, Erin, and for the gift. It's cute."

Erin smiled slightly. "No problem… and Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"Be careful, okay?"

"Always am," I grinned, shutting the door once he was in his car and driving away. I leaned on the door, thoughts racing through my head. I had more pieces to the puzzle now, but I still didn't know where they fit or even what the puzzle was supposed to look like. Hell, maybe there wasn't even a puzzle…

I went back to cleaning, running the dishwasher and finding something edible to make for when Charlie got home. Dinner was a couple cans of chili over a hunk of baked chicken and baking powder biscuits. Charlie didn't seem as suspicious of my food as he was at first, and seemed relieved that I was back on my feet and cooking. A quick peek into the freezer after dinner revealed that we had been running low on TV dinners he'd apparently stocked up on; I was lucky to have recovered when I did. At least my ice cream was still safely tucked where I'd put it. I snagged the entire thing, a spoon and scurried upstairs to finish my homework.

Sleep came earlier than usual, and I passed out around ten o' clock instead of tossing and turning until past midnight. When I woke up Monday morning, the ice was completely melted away and the news people on TV were reporting that the weather would warm up a bit the next few weeks. Of course it would… I'd nearly been crushed, the weather could return to normal now. I shook my head as I gathered my things, skipping breakfast and wobbling my way out the door and over to Erin's car as he pulled up. I was welcomed back to school like I'd risen from the dead or something-- people I barely knew were asking how I was, and I spent most of English class hiding behind Mike, who was more protective than usual.

"Aw, you're like a bipedal German Shepherd," Erin snerked at Mike as the three of us walked to my Government class.

Mike, who had just scared off a couple of freshman girls, gave Erin a dirty look. "I'm just being a good friend. I don't want Bella getting stressed."

Erin peeked around Mike and grinned at me. "Are you paying him for this sort of service?"

"Now you're making me sound like a prostitute," Mike whined.

I blushed and quickly scurried into Government class as they began bickering. I was flattered by Mike's behavior, but I wasn't about to get in between him and Erin when they were acting like crabby old ladies. Little did either of them know that I was already stressed, and a good chunk of it had nothing to do with being mobbed by random, curious students. Lunch was drawing closer and closer with each class; I would have the chance to see Edward for the first time since the incident with Tyler's van, and in Geometry class, Angela confirmed that she had safely given Edward the letter.

Jessica watched me oddly in Spanish class when I stumbled on an easy oral quiz, raising an eyebrow as I slunk back to my seat. "Are you sure that you're feeling better? You look all sweaty."

I gave a nervous laugh. "I'm fine. I just hate quizzes, you know me."

She let me leave it at that, but continued to keep an eye on me as we entered the lunch room. By that point, I wasn't sure who was freaking me out more-- Jessica or Edward. I at least managed to ignore Jessica as we went through the lunch line. I was able to scan the cafeteria without gaining her suspicion, putting on as bored of an expression as possible. Since I only had an orange and a carton of milk, I was the first one back to the table besides Angela and I was free to stare at the Cullen's table without getting grilled. Sure enough, Edward was there…

Mike seemed to pop up out of nowhere a few moments later, though, and I was forced to try and pay attention to his rapid chatter. "Bella! I heard on the news that the weather is going to be great for the next few weeks. We're planning to bump the trip to La Push up a bit in case it gets bad again on Halloween. It'll be perfect, we can have a bonfire and everything. What do you think?"

"Hey!" an unfamiliar voice called just as I was about to speak. One of the older boys from the table next to us came running over, and judging by the scratches all over him and the pitiful look on his face, I guessed that this was Tyler Crowly. "Hey, you're Isabella, right?"

"Bella," I corrected. "Yes, I am. You're Tyler, right? Listen, about last week, I--"

"Yeah, I am SO sorry. I was so stupid for trying to rush like that, and I was beating myself up over it all week. Stupid, stupid."

I flailed mentally as he began to smack himself on the head with his binder. "But I'm f--"

"I'm wondering if I can make it up to you. Do you want to go out some time?"

"Uhm…" I glanced at everyone else. The rest of the people who sat at my table had magically seemed to appear while the one-sided conversation had taken place, and all eyes were on me. Lauren, the blond girl who had glared at me since day one, looked positively homicidal. "Tyler, that's really nice of you, but your apology was enough. Really."

The tension in the air seemed to diffuse, even though Lauren still looked fit to kill, especially as lunch ended and Tyler… obviously not understanding the concept of 'enough'… decided to carry my Biology book for me to class. Mike looked positively rabid as I walked into class with Tyler following along behind me; apparently my attempt at hiding my annoyance had failed.

"Hey, Tyler, I have to talk to you…"

Tyler blinked as Mike grabbed him by the arm and led him out into the hall, the door clicking shut almost ominously behind them. I sighed in relief, sitting down at the table… and noticing Edward for the first time since I'd entered the classroom.

"Hello, Edward," I greeted quietly, arranging my finished homework neatly on top of my textbook.

He glanced at me for only a moment, nodded, and then went back to staring at the chalkboard. I didn't say a word to him for the rest of class, my heart pounding loud enough in my chest that I worried about my voice wavering; I'd made my move, and now it was his turn. I would practice self control and wait until he decided to tell me what I wanted to know. At least, that was the plan.

As the days went by, it was turning out to be a long wait indeed. The week passed slowly, the excitement from the incident with Tyler fading away as people moved on to newer gossip, specifically who was asking who to the homecoming dance at the end of October. Lauren, currently being pursued by Tyler thank in part to a little guy talk from Mike, was in a much better mood and happily playing matchmaker to everyone else at the table. Sans myself, of course; for some reason she still disliked me, and the feeling was fairly mutual. I resigned myself to listening to everyone else talk about the dance, having disavowed myself from the activity, keeping an eye on the Cullen table when the others weren't paying attention.

Edward was as silent on Tuesday as he was the day before, and he was the same on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. I did my best to ignore him, immersing myself in my classes during school and busying myself with teaching Charlie how to cook after school. Even so, I still found myself peeking in his direction during lunch, and I couldn't get that dream I'd had of him out of my head. Edward Cullen had made himself a part of my daily life, whether or not he realized it… and whether or not I wanted it. He had saved my life and my inner romanticist, that little part of me that was the incurable dreamer, had cast him into the light of a hero. I was finding myself, without a doubt, hopelessly and pathetically crushing on him.

The first of October came and went on Saturday, and it seemed that the new month brought with it the start of a much larger change. I was home alone and doing my Sunday 'cleansing ritual' of vacuuming and mopping when the phone rang. For a moment I considered not answering it, paranoia stinging the back of my mind, but I scooped it up at the last minute.

"Hello?"

Jessica squealed on the other end of the line. "Ooh, you ARE home. I wanted to talk to you about the dance."

I sunk into one of the kitchen chairs, looking at the sky out the window. "I can spare a few minutes, I guess. What did you want to talk about?"

"You've been sort of quiet at lunch when we talk about stuff, but you never said if you're going or not. Do you think you will?"

The thought of all those strobe lights made me wince. "No, I'm not going. Dances really aren't my thing," I replied. I was thankful that no one had, to my knowledge, seen my seizure at school… No one besides Edward, perhaps. I suddenly went from grateful to moody as the gold-eyed boy invaded my thoughts. "I think I'm going to go up to Seattle with Angela that day. She's not going unless she gets asked out."

"I heard. You and you bookworms, I swear. Erin said he isn't going, either. You don't have to bring a date, you know."

"Yeah, I know. It doesn't have much to do with dates, you know how I am with big groups of people."

She sighed. "Yeah… Speaking of dates," Jessica suddenly switched topics. "You… well, you don't mind if I ask Mike to the dance, do you?"

"Why would it?" I asked, her hesitant tone taking me by surprise.

"Well, it's just that you two seem really close sometimes… Yanno? I wish I could get him to fall over my feet the same way he does with you."

I made a mental note to talk with Mike the next day. "Oh come on, Jessica. Mike and I are friends only; he really likes you a lot. You've been yammering about one another for the last three weeks, just ask him out already."

She didn't respond for a second, then spoke again, more thoughtfully. "You've been paying a lot of attention to the Cullens lately. Is there anything going on that I should know about?"

"No way!" I exclaimed, flustered at her question. Glancing at the clock, I realized Charlie would be home soon; it gave me the perfect excuse to run for it. "Hey, Jessica, I need to start dinner. Good luck with Mike, okay?"

"Mmhm. See you tomorrow, Bella."

I hung up the phone, trying to ignore the promise of interrogation in her voice. Damn it, so that's why she'd been looking at me like that. I'd thought I was being subtle… Well, maybe not subtle, but at least not obvious. I'd barely been paying attention to Edward, save for the occasional glance here and there. I was horrible at hiding my expressions; perhaps I'd reacted without thinking, and that's what had given me away. I scowled, chopping up some left over chicken and tossing it into a pan with vegetables.

The rest of the evening was spent on making burritos, watching a car race on television with Charlie and falling asleep while reading Of Mice and Men. I woke up late the next morning with a drool-stained book, the faint trace of ink on my cheek and Erin knocking on the door. I didn't bother with my hair, my usual concealer make-up or even putting on new clothes; I'd fallen asleep in yesterday's clothes, and those would have to be good enough. Zooming downstairs, I grabbed as much of my stuff as I could and rushed out to Erin's car.

"Sleeping Beauty awakens!" he laughed as I rushed past him, running a hand through my curly mess of a mane and trying to scrub the ink off my face. "I was going to break the door down in a minute there."

"Uhg. I don't know what's wrong with me, I was reading our new English book and just passed out."

"That book does have the tendency to drain the joy right out of your soul," Erin said. "Of course, Jessica also has the same tendency. Did she get a hold of you last night, by the way?"

"What, she called you too?"

He drummed his fingers on the wheel, glancing at me nervously. "She was trying to convince me to go to the dance. She was trying to set me up with Stacy."

"Ah," I replied, thinking of the geeky girl who sat with Tyler's table. "And?"

"… And what?"

I gave him the same look my mother gave me when I was younger; it always made me cower, and it was about time I learned to wield the same weapon. "And are you going?"

Erin shrunk into his seat. "I already have a date," he muttered.

"Really?" I stared at him, wondering why he hadn't said anything. "Who is she?"

"He," Erin seemed to get even smaller. "Ben Colton."

I stared at him, my sleep-addled brain trying to turn the mental gears. "Oh… Ohhh," I grinned wickedly as I connected the dots. "Mike's friend from the football team?" I asked. "You are going to break SO many hearts, Erin York. He's a catch."

Peeking over at me, Erin looked a little less wilted as we pulled into the school parking lot. "You're… not freaked out?"

I made a noise of exasperation, getting out of the car and glaring at the sky as it began to rain. "Erin, trust me. If I was going to be freaked out about something, that's pretty low on the list. My aunt is a lesbian, that's why she moved to New Mexico… to get away from my mom's family."

"You won't tell anyone?" he asked as we stopped outside the English building. "It's just… people talk. You know how Forks can get."

"Cross my heart and hope to d--"

He held up his hands. "I appreciate the sentiment, but let's not tempt fate, okay?"

I grinned, giving him a hug and heading into class. I glanced at the Cullen's Volvo as it pulled up in the parking lot before shutting the classroom door behind me. It seemed like everyone in Forks had some sort of secret, some sort of mystery behind them…

… One down, five more to go.


	8. Chapter Seven

Mike wasn't in English class, strangely enough, which made me wonder what exactly went on between him and Jessica the night before. Erin was unusually quiet, and I wondered if he regretted telling me about his secret. I hoped that wasn't the case, but either way, he slowly became talkative again near the end of class and was his chatty self by the time he walked me to Government. Jessica was suspiciously absent from Spanish, and neither she nor Mike were at the lunch table by the time I got to the cafeteria.

"I wonder where Mike and Jessica made off to," I said as I came back with my lunch. There were hardly any people at the table; the only ones there besides me were Erin, Angela, Lauren and one of her little cronies. "It's not like them to not even show up."

"And how would you know?" Lauren snipped from the other side of the table.

"Oh, I tend to be more observant than most," I replied, sick to death of that girl's cattiness. I plastered a bright, cheerful smile on my face. "No offense or anything."

Lauren flipped her hair, turning to whisper something to her friend. The two picked up their stuff and went over to sit with Tyler and the others, and I rolled my eyes as the beginnings of a new round of gossip started up... Probably involving my being mean to the poor, victimized popular girl. Angela gave me a proud look, and I tried to feel good about standing up for myself even though I wanted to panic and go hide under my bed. Luckily for me, the bell rang soon enough and I was able to run off to Biology with Angela in tow.

Of course, it was trading one set of problems for another. I ignored Edward like always, focusing instead on the fact that Mike had magically returned from wherever he'd been, all cheer and smiles. He bounced over to my side of the table as soon as I walked in the door, practically bursting at the seams with enthusiasm.

"Hey, Bella! What did I miss in English?"

I grinned. "Depends on where you were."

He glanced left, then right, as if someone might be sneaking up to listen in; sadly enough, were I not sitting next to the single most attractive and intimidating boy in all of Forks, they probably would have been. "Jessica and I were off… celebrating," he whispered. "She asked me out."

"Ahhh… Well, I suppose true love is a good enough excuse to give you the assignment," I said, digging around in my bag and handing him a copy of the worksheet I'd picked up for him. "I thought you'd show up eventually."

"Thank you, ma'am!" he grinned. "I heard you weren't going to the dance, though. Gotta say I'm disappointed."

I sighed, slightly disconcerted at the fact that Jessica might have been discussing me while she and Mike did lords knew what. "Yeah, I'm heading up to Seattle that day. With Angela, unless she gets asked out, in which case I'll be hitchhiking my way there."

Mike stared at me. "You? Hitchhike?" he asked with an incredulous tone, and I tried not to laugh as I practically saw all the various horrible scenarios I could get into going through his head. "But…"

But then the teacher called the class to order, and Mike was forced to slink back off to his desk, looking just as disturbed about my hitchhiking as I felt about his make-out session with my best friend. A small chuckle came from next to me, and I glanced at Edward, my heart immediately thumping a bit faster than normal.

"It's a bit cruel to tease him, isn't it?" Edward mused quietly, giving me a side-long look.

I tried to summon the nerve I had during lunch, focusing all my panic into as biting a manner as possible. "You're not one to talk."

He looked at me fully, his expression infuriatingly neutral. "You think I'm cruel?"

"I think you've not talked to me for weeks, and you better not start unless you're going to reply to what I wrote."

Edward's eyes narrowed. "Fine."

I opened my textbook and looked away. "Fine."

The boy was silent for nearly ten minutes, then turned to me when the teacher left to go make copies of the worksheet, speaking in the quietest possible voice. "What does it matter to you, anyway? You're alive, shouldn't that be enough?"

"I'm nosey," I replied, trying to sound as bored as possible. Pretending I didn't care covered up the sheer giddiness that he was talking to me again. "That and you traveled at least twenty feet in about a second. I think I have the right to be curious."

"You're mental."

"Being crazy isn't the same as being wrong."

A low growl came from his throat. The teacher came back, and the conversation ended there. He said nothing else, and was the first out the door when the class ended. I spent the rest of the school day assuring Mike I wasn't going to hitchhike to Seattle as we tossed a basketball back and forth during the break. Erin was quiet on the way home, and I was grateful that Charlie was at work. It gave me time to think out loud without people listening in and thinking I had gone completely over the edge.

"Okay, so he saved my life," I said to the air, dumping my stuff by the door and storming into the living room. "Good for him. I can let all this go now, it doesn't matter how he did it or why he did it. I'm alive. That's all that matters."

But I couldn't let it go. People aren't supposed to be able to do stuff like that, it wasn't natural. That was the sort of thing that would be found in comic books or movies, not in real life… or was it? I shook my head, pacing the length of the living room as I tried to think of all the rational reasons possible to explain what I'd seen.

"He was closer than I thought, I just thought he was farther away. He didn't push me out of the way, I actually ran and I don't remember. Someone else saved me and I assume it was him because I saw him. Edward wasn't really there at all… Damn it, this is stupid," I stopped, flopping down on the sofa. "If I'd run for it, if it hadn't been him or if he'd been closer, then he wouldn't be acting like such an ass."

"Who's acting like a what?"

I nearly jumped out of my skin at my father's voice. Luckily, he was just coming in the door and likely hadn't heard much. "Uhm… Some dude on TV was being… rude," I said lamely, waving my hand at the blank television screen. "So I decided to get started on dinner."

Charlie's eyes lit up; the food distraction worked every time. "So, what have you been up to today?"

I quickly made my way into the kitchen and started baking a casserole. "Oh, not much," I said. Just yelling at myself. "I wanted to ask you if it's okay for Angela to drive me up to Seattle the week after next."

"Isn't that homecoming week? Jessica's mother was talking about it when she dropped of lunch for the secretary."

My first reaction was to bang my head on the kitchen counter. Instead, I gave my dad a patient smile. "Yes, it is, but I'm not going to the homecoming dance. Flashing lights and I don't get along too well."

His face fell a bit. "Oh… that's right. I always seem to forget."

"It's okay, dad," I lied. Constant reminders of things I couldn't do didn't really make good conversation, unwittingly given or not. I tried to focus on dinner, but I could feel 'that subject' worm its way into the room, the tension in the air steadily increasing.

"Isabella… I think we need to talk," Charlie finally said, affirming the feeling of dread that had been growing in the back of my skull. "I think that maybe it's time we talked about what happened. About your health."

"I've been taking my medication. Erin's giving me a ride to school. Things are going fine, there's nothing to talk about."

Charlie opened his mouth to reply, then shut it again. "I understand it's hard to talk about. I can wait. But I need to say this, and I hope that you can believe me. If I'd have known that your mother's condition was genetic… If I'd known it could have been passed down… I would have told you. I would never have put you in that sort of danger."

I set down the oven mitts, setting the egg timer for another half an hour and avoiding his gaze. "You didn't. Mom did."

My father fell silent, and I could sense that the discussion-- for now-- was over. While the casserole finished baking, I escaped up to my room with the excuse of needing to shower. I didn't want to be there in the room with Charlie while my emotions began to boil to the surface; I didn't want him to see me angry and mistakenly think I was mad at him. Grabbing my nightwear, I turned the shower on full blast and stepped into the scalding-hot water, letting it work away my tension like it always did.

It hurt inside to know that he blamed himself for what had happened to me. Had he been beating himself up over the crash all these years? Yes, he had been the one to buy me the car for my birthday on one of his rare trips down there to see me dance, but it certainly hadn't been his fault that I'd gotten into the accident. My mother had done a very good job at hiding her illness from me, and I had done an even better job at ignoring the signs that something had been wrong with me. How many mornings had I woken up before then with arm spasms, with little pieces of time missing that I couldn't quite explain? Charlie had done nothing wrong, yet I didn't know what had gone on between my parents in the days following the accident. It made me sick to think that perhaps my aggressive mother had shoved the blame off on Charlie, who seemed all too willing to accept the burdens of others.

Perhaps it was my own fault for letting him believe such a thing. I'd barely spoken to him for three years. It was selfish on my part, and I felt a wave of guilt wash over me. If only I'd been able to see past my own misery, maybe I would have been able to see the spiral my mother had been falling down into. Maybe I would have been able to see my father's own pain. Could I have stopped it? Probably not. People couldn't be forced to change their mindset that easily. But maybe I could have stopped it from getting worse, and that wasn't a part of myself I was ready to confront.

Leaving the shower, I slipped into my clothes and wandered into my room. I flicked on the computer, going online partially to e-mail my mother like I'd promised and partially to distract myself. Once I fought back the pop-up ads, I logged into my e-mail and typed out a quick reply to a message my mother had sent me-- apparently she was worried about me going out on Halloween. I wondered exactly what she expected to happen to me in Forks. Aside from ice storms and bad drivers nearly smushing me, I doubted that anything vile was lurking in the darkness here. Aside from her message and the usual junk, there was a letter from my therapist. I opened it and read over her usual short, to the point message.

_Dear Bella,_

_I'll be calling you sometime next week. I'm sorry I missed you last month; my husband is ill. It's understandable that you feel the need to protect your mother, but I'm sure she knows that you're not as happy as you make yourself out to be. Try some fish oil for the knee, it helps me with my arthritis. Don't feel bad asking for something you need-- we all need help sometimes. If you're worried about your medication, it might be wise to go to your doctor and talk to them. As for the boy in your class, trust your instincts. You know what's right. Be careful, though. Good luck with Charlie. If anyone can teach him to cook, it's you. Talk to you next week!_

_Sincerely,_

_Nora_

I considered replying, then decided to just wait until next week. Logging off my account, I read a few web comics before the egg timer went off downstairs. I was reluctant to go back and face Charlie again, but with any luck at all, he'd given up on talking about things for now. I sighed and shut the computer down, wishing I could escape for a little bit longer. I headed down to the kitchen, praying that dinner would be just another quiet meal in front of the wonderful, distracting television. One could only hope.

* * * * *

Dinner was thankfully uneventful, and my dreams that night were devoid of guest appearances from Edward. Sleep came late due to studying for a Government test I was almost certain I was going to fail, and the monsoon occurring outside certainly didn't help; it was raining the hardest it had rained in weeks and showed no signs of stopping by the time I fell asleep at two o' clock in the morning. When I woke up, however, I noticed two things-- I was running late once again, and it was light outside.

Sun!

I squealed, bouncing across the room and trying not to trip over my legs as I peeked out my window. Sure enough, the sky was a soft blue with only the barest hint of frail, wispy clouds overhead and in the distance. I felt my spirits soar, and it took me less time to get ready to go than normal as the fantastic weather lent to me a good dose of joyful energy. Even though I'd woken up late, I was still out the door before Erin got there, sitting on the steps and soaking up the pale, golden rays of sunshine. Our car ride to school seemed more animated and cheerful, and as we pulled into the parking lot and got out, everyone seemed to be friendlier.

By the time Geometry class arrived, however, the thin clouds had expanded and once more taken over the sky. The usual solemnity fell over the student body, the playful energy from early all but vanishing as the skies parted and the rain returned in full force. I blamed the turn of weather for the terrible grade I received on a pop quiz on volume and mass; Angela didn't do much better, and we sulked off to our separate classes without our usual friendly interactions. Spanish class wasn't much better, though Jessica seemed pleasant enough as we headed to lunch.

"Do you think I should let Mike take me up to Olympia with him this week? I guess he wants to go to this one restaurant. I don't know if it's too soon…"

I ran a hand through my hair, rubbing at my neck nervously as we neared the lunch room and I fought back my agoraphobia. "I'm not sure, Jessica. I've never dated, so I wouldn't know."

Her jaw dropped. "You never had a boyfriend? Or anything?"

I blushed. "I've never really had the time," I muttered. It was the truth, really. I'd been too busy going to physical therapy and trying to catch up on missed school work that I'd been forced to forgo the entire idea of dating.

"I don't see how you've survived. Poor thing."

Apparently I had missed some cosmic memo; I wasn't aware that dating was a requirement for living. I chose to ignore the pitying look on Jessica's face as I snagged my lunch and trudged back to the table. Luckily for me, Mike was so busy talking about his plans for the beach trip that Jessica was distracted and failed to question me further. All was going as usual until suddenly, right there, was Edward Cullen.

"I'm sorry to interrupt," he said with one of those dazzling smiles, "but could I borrow Bella for a moment?"

A silence fell over the table, and I tried to ignore the way Jessica stared at me with bugged out eyes as I stood up and followed the boy to an empty table. We sat down and I folded my hands in my lap, not meeting his gaze. My heart was already pounding quick enough, I didn't need to pass out from looking into those gorgeous, topaz eyes. Edward didn't say anything for a moment, then chuckled quietly.

"You're probably confused," Edward murmured. "I read your letter."

I fought back the butterflies in my stomach and summoned up a healthy dose of righteous irritation. "That was a month ago."

"I know. I wanted to apologize to you, Bella. I'm sorry for acting the way I have… I just didn't want to hurt you."

Finally, I managed to glare at him. "How the hell could you hurt me? Like ignoring me made me feel better?"

He smiled slightly, and my anger faltered. "It was for your own good. We shouldn't be friends... I'm not the best person to keep company with, you see."

My throat tightened a bit. "So I've heard. Then why bother talking to me now?" I asked, my voice too close to a squeak for my comfort.

"You remind me of someone I knew once," he added, looking out the nearby window as his smile faded. "I don't want to stay away from you. It pains me to try."

I turned my attention to the zipper on my jacket, fiddling with it. "Who is it? The person I remind you of, I mean."

Edward watched me a moment, then shook his head. "I've never been good with people. Especially when it involves talking about my past. Maybe this is a mistake… Maybe we'd be better off just forgetting about things. Of course, that's not what you want, is it?"

"I wish we could be friends," I replied quietly. "It would be nice to get to know you."

"And if it turns out to be not so nice after all?"

Something in the tone of his voice made the voice in the back of head shiver. I glanced up, finding nothing but sincerity in his eyes. "I'll take my chances."

"In that case," Edward continued, "I want to make things up to you. Would you like a ride to Seattle the night of the dance?"

"Oh, well…" I stammered. My heart nearly fluttered right out of my chest, and I was grateful when the bell rang; gathering up my things gave me a moment to catch the breath that had suddenly left me. The idea of being alone with such a gorgeous man was unbearably amazing. "Uhm, Angela was giving me a ride that day. You know, unless she found a date or something. It's a very kind offer…"

He smiled brightly, and my knees quivered. "Keep it in mind, just in case. I better let you go back to your friends… your guard dog looks ready to implode."

A quick glance at Mike confirmed that the jock was about ready to come over and rescue me from Edward. "I will most definitely keep it in mind," I squeaked. "See you in biology!"

I scurried off before he could reply, though I thought I could hear his quiet laughter as I nearly stumbled over an empty milk carton in my attempt to escape. Everyone stared at me as I approached, and although Angela said nothing, her eyes were wide and curious as we headed to Biology. Mike kept demanding to know what Edward had wanted with me; I lied and said it was about homework. He seemed to accept my answer, but he kept casting me suspicious glances on our way to class. Halfway to the room, a shorter, dark-haired boy with glasses jogged up and stopped Angela, who urged us to go on without her.

Mike wiggled his eyebrows as we left. "Seems like everyone is getting asked out today," he said, and I sighed at the hidden implications of that statement.

"Not everyone," I grumbled. Part of me was thankful that Edward was not in biology when we got there, lest my face gave away the wild thoughts running through my head.

Angela came in a few minutes later, practically glowing. "Bella," she whispered, rushing over and trying not to attract too much attention as she stole Edward's empty seat and practically bubbled. "Guess what?"

"You got asked to the dance?" I guessed, mentally cursing Edward for jinxing me.

She nodded vigorously, then looked slightly ashamed. "Oh, but our plans…"

"Don't worry about it. I have a back-up plan."

This seemed to put her mind at peace, and she bounced off as the teacher came in and started class. I doodled in my notebook as he began to lecture, zoning out as usual. It was only when there were a few, complaining groans around the room that I looked up… and nearly dropped. The teacher stood there with a lancet and a bloody sheet of paper.

"So, if you'll pass out the kits, Mike…" the teacher said, handing Mike a bunch of small boxes.

I raised my hand a bit, feeling faint. "Uhm…" I raised my hand a bit higher when the teacher ignored me, wanting to shrink into a corner as a few eyes turned to me. "Excuse me?"

The teacher finally noticed me… along with the entire class. "Yes, Miss Swanson?"

"I… Uhm, could I go to the… er, nurse? Please? I already know my blood type, and… uhm…"

Mike came to my rescue. "I'll take her," he offered. "She's got a thing about blood."

"Oh! Why didn't she just say so?"

If I hadn't felt like I was going to pass out, I'd have walked over there and thrown up on the teacher out of spite. I muttered to myself as Mike helped guide me out the door and towards the office. My breath was coming too quick, and I suddenly had to sit down as my vision darkened. My hands twitched a bit; I put my head in my hands and counted to myself. If I got too worked up, I could have a seizure. Mike was rubbing my shoulders, and I finally convinced myself to stop hyperventilating as I relaxed. I sighed, the feeling fading into plain old nausea. I stood up…

…And woke up in the nurse's office with three faces peering anxiously at me.

The first face was the nurse. "She's awake. Isabella, are you okay, hun?"

"Mm, yeah," I mumbled. "Tired."

"I'll go call your father and have him get you. Mike, dear, shouldn't you back to class?"

"But--"

A smooth, calm voice interrupted. "I'll stay with her. I was leaving for an appointment anyhow, so I won't get in trouble for missing class."

After a minute, I was left alone with the last face… and through my grogginess, I finally identified that handsome, haunting face as Edward Cullen. I struggled to sit up, embarrassment rushing through me at being incapacitated in front of him. Finally, I made it to a sitting position, and I realized I was under a blanket and laying on the floor. I heard the nurse on the phone, mentioning to bring me a fresh change of clothes. Tears of humiliation stung my eyes.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked.

"If I was, I wouldn't be here," I snapped.

He eyed me. "You never mentioned that you had epilepsy."

"It's not like I advertise it. Did… What happened? You weren't in Biology class."

Edward focused on his hands suddenly. "I was in my car listening to music. Mike came along with you in tow… Then you sat down, and when you stood up again you dropped like a rock. Mike caught you but you were having a seizure. I came up and stayed with you while he got the nurse, but you stopped after a moment, so I picked you up and brought you into the office."

"Do you think he'll tell anyone?"

"Why ask me?" he glanced up, brows furrowed.

"Because you're the mind-reader," I said dryly. His face went blank, and I wondered exactly what I said to cause that reaction. "Angela got asked out to the dance today. I guess I have to take you up on your offer."

"I see." He paused, then stood up and grabbed his things in a single movement, the picture of grace. "I better get going. Feel better soon, Bella."

I nodded. Edward gave me that wonderful smile and left, and it was like the sun had left the sky. I wrapped my arms around myself and shivered, waiting for Charlie to get there. It wasn't more than five minutes before he arrived, handing me a bag of clothes and politely avoiding talking and eye contact. I took the bag and managed to stand up on my own, wobbling off towards the nearby bathroom. Locking the door, I rested my forehead on the door and let a few tears slide down my cheeks.

Why me? Why couldn't I just have been a normal kid? Anger rushed through my muscles, and I punched the wall before I could really think about it. My knuckles immediately bled, and shame followed on the heels of the anger. What right did I have to be complaining? It could always be worse… It was stupid to waste time being upset. I sniffled and wiped my eyes, stripping off my clothes and putting on the unsoiled ones my father had brought. I shoved the others into the bad and tied it shut, then draped my jacket over my arm and the bag, hoping to hide my scratched hand. I ducked my head as I left the bathroom, silently making my way towards the car; luckily there was no one watching, and the rain had graciously halted long enough so that I wasn't forced to wear my jacket and expose my self-caused injury.

The ride home was a quiet one. It wasn't until we pulled into the driveway that Charlie spoke.

"You need to go to the doctor and make sure your medication is working," he said, turning off the car and toying with the keychain. "I know you don't want to talk about it, so I won't, but I want you to get yourself checked out. Soon."

I wasn't going to bother fighting it, especially when he was using his work-voice. Police officers could be scarily convincing. "I'll call them tomorrow."

He got out of the car and I followed suit, the conversation over. I tossed my clothes into the washer once I was inside, then slunk upstairs to take a shower. The phone rang as I finished my shower and headed towards my room; it was my therapist, and I breathed a sigh of relief as I went downstairs, grabbed the cordless phone from my father and headed back up to my room for some privacy.

"Hello?"

"Hey there," Nora's friendly voice greeted me on the other end of the line. "How are you, Bella?"

"I don't know," I sighed, laying down on my bed. "So much has happened since you last e-mailed me…"

For an hour, we talked about everything that had happened. The thing with Tyler, my making a small group of friends, how I felt bad for having Erin drive me to school. I talked about the dance, how I was angry at myself for not being able to go and jealous of Jessica and the others. Finally, I mentioned Edward and my worries about his attitude, yet the fact I was attracted to him was undeniable.

"I remember being in love with the bad boys," Nora chuckled. "There's nothing wrong with liking him, but judging from what you've said before, you should still be careful if that's what your intuition tells you. Maybe you should just be cautious until you spend more time with him and his family, and let yourself trust him as things go along."

I bit my lip. "It's really not so bad. I think he's just not that social."

My therapist paused, then made a noncommittal noise. "Your own social issues could be exaggerating what's really going on, true. I think you should really learn to listen to yourself. You're a strong, smart person, Bella. Why don't you try writing up some positive affirmations and read over them every day?"

"Okay," I toyed with my medical bracelet. "I'll keep what you said in mind."

"And Bella? Don't be worried over needing to take some time for yourself. It's not a bad thing to bend the rules every now and then. Get some rest."

"I will. Thanks, Nora."

"No problem. Talk to you next month."

We hung up, and I snuggled under the covers of my bed. It was as if Nora's suggestion had summoned some god of sleep into my room; I was so tired that my eyes refused to open. I'd barely slept after me seizure, and it had all caught up to me. I sighed again, wrapping my arms around my pillow and pushing Nora's words from my mind. I would think about all of it tomorrow. Things would be better then…


	9. Chapter Eight

A ringing noise came from under my pillow. I snapped awake, looking to the clock… the alarm wasn't going off, yet the ringing persisted. I lifted my pillow and discovered the phone; I had apparently passed out with it in my hand. I fumbled around with the buttons before finally hitting the right one.

"Hi?" I muttered, rubbing my eyes. "Who is it?"

"Bella, you're finally awake!" Mike cheered. I glanced at the clock to recheck the time, and nearly screamed when I realized it was almost noon. Aside from my panic at being incredibly late, I suddenly wondered exactly how many times people had been trying to get hold of me. "We've been calling you for hours."

Well, there was my answer. "I'm so sorry, I must have really passed out. Uhm, what's up?"

"It's okay. After yesterday…" he hesitated. "Well, it's okay. I was wondering if you're feeling better. We've all skipped school and we're planning to head out to La Push today. Do you want to go?"

"Weren't you going to go on Halloween?"

"Have you even looked outside yet?"

Stumbling out of bed, I was about to protest until I saw the bright, glorious, wonderful sunlight that poured itself across the area. There were no clouds in sight and, unlike the pale sky the day before, today's sky was a brilliant, vivid blue. I shuffled my feet a bit, testing them and taking a moment to gauge my condition. I was a bit tired, but I felt better than I had and my usual spasms were absent. At first, I considered telling him no-- I should go to school instead of the beach. But…

"Wow," I replied. Nora's words danced around in the back of my mind, and while I knew she likely didn't intend to suggest that I should skip school and go celebrate the sun with a pack of people, I figured she'd be pleased enough that I was taking a break and attempting to overcome my fear of people. "Sure, I'll go. When are you leaving?"

"In about half an hour. I'll swing by and pick you up, if that's good with you."

"That works. I'll see you in a bit."

He practically squealed before he left, and I set the phone down as I pondered what I'd need. Opening the rusty window, I breathed in the fresh air and squealed myself at the unnaturally warm temperature. I shut the window again and went to my dresser, getting a light knit, blue turtleneck sweater and jeans. Since I couldn't swim, I didn't bother with anything else except for my sandals, sunglasses and a bottle of sunscreen. I grabbed my wallet, penned a quick note to my father out of habit-- telling who I was with, where we were going and apologizing very much for skipping school-- and headed out the door. Mike pulled up in a giant SUV, and I hopped into the passenger side, trying not to fall as I hoisted myself up into the monster of a car.

"This is going to be so great," Mike said as he zoomed down the street. "I'm glad you can come with us. I was kinda worried."

"Listen, about yesterday…"

He smiled sheepishly. "Erin already filled me in. I won't tell anyone, I promise. Although… Why don't you tell people? It's not like we'll think less of you or anything."

I kept my eyes out the window and focused on the sky. "It's just... It's my own problem. It's not like it's that bad, anyhow. There's no need to make everyone worry about me when they don't need to."

Mike made the same noise my therapist had made the night before, but he didn't say anything else about it as we pulled up to the parking lot of his father's store. "Stop number one. We just need to get everyone figured out, then we'll head out to La Push."

There were at least fifteen people there already. I was tempted to stay in the car and hide, but I saw Jessica and Angela not too far away from our car, and I followed Mike over to say hello. I stopped when I was Lauren approach Jessica and I decided to stay by the car after all, especially when the girl threw a sneer in my general direction. I didn't want a confrontation. Tyler arrived in his new car just then, and the group of people began to split up between the SUV and the minivan. Angela saw me and waved. I waved back, trying to keep my amusement in check when both she and Jessica headed my way as everyone decided who to go with; Lauren looked livid.

We piled into Mike's car, with Mike and Jessica smushed side by side in the front seat and Angela squeezed into the window seat. I sat in the middle row of seats with Erin, who had showed up last-minute with Ben Colton at his side, the two looking more than little anxious. Ben had brought his brother, Robert, and two girls who looked very cozy with one another. The football player took the seat next to Erin, and his brother and the two girls hopped into the back of the car. After we'd all settled into our spots and managed to get our seat-belts on, we headed out, following Tyler's van out of town.

Everyone rolled the windows down to let in the fresh air, and I felt like I was in heaven. I stayed quiet while the others talked excitedly about what they wanted to do when they got there, content to watch the scenery. The thing about La Push was that the beach was actually not much of a beach. There was a forest that eventually turned into rocks and driftwood, and only a few yards of actual sand between that and the ocean. I hated the ocean with a passion, and the idea of not having much distance between it and me wasn't very comforting. Still, I found myself relaxing as the others got hyper; their giddiness was contagious. Someone popped in a CD and turned the music up after a few minutes, and I couldn't help but giggle when Mike began to yodel out the words. Somehow we all ended up singing along with the music, and the half hour that it took to get to La Push passed by quicker than I would have thought. It was good to laugh again.

When we got to the beach, Tyler and his group… who drove like maniacs the entire way there, apparently… were already setting up their 'camp'. We unloaded from the SUV and walked down to join them. Most of the people ran off to go swimming, and the few of us who didn't stayed behind to help Mike gather driftwood. In the end, it was just Mike and I; everyone else had gotten persuaded to take a hike over to the tide pools. Mike set the wood up just so, then looked over at me and grinned.

"Watch this," he said, then lit the fire.

I stared in awe as the flames leaping up from the wood turned green. "Wow. How did you do that?"

"The salt in the ocean water makes the fire turn colors," Mike replied, looking proud of himself. "I learned that in Chemistry."

Jessica suddenly ran up in her swimsuit, and I snickered as Mike nearly dropped his lighter. "Hey you two, do you want to come swimming with us? It's awesome out there."

I shook my head. "I can't swim. I'll stay here and guard the fire. You know, keep it from burning the forest down," I added, waving my hand to the thick stand of trees. Knowing my luck, it would burn down anyhow just to spite me. "You guys go."

Mike winked at me and mouthed a silent 'thank you' as he jogged off after Jessica, obviously happy to be relieved of fire duty. I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, watching the flickering flames and letting my mind wander. I closed my eyes as the sun warmed my back, and for a moment I wished that Edward was there. Nora said to learn more about him… It'd be easier to do that if I could actually be around him without losing my voice. I still wanted answers, and I wasn't going to get them by being a squeaky little coward. Maybe I would take him up on his offer to drive me to Seattle, after all. If I got him alone, maybe I could get him to actually talk…

A noise came from the woods behind me, snapping me out of my thoughts. I looked towards the sound, but saw nothing. The noise came again and I stood up, taking a step closer to the trees. Maybe it was just a wild animal or something. Suddenly, a pine cone flew from the shadows and bounced off my head; I was about to run for it when an oddly familiar voice came from behind a tree.

"Well, well. If it's not Miss Trip and Fall, returned from exile."

I stared at the mischievous face that peeked out at me, then grabbed the pine cone and hurled it back at the Native American boy. "Jacob Black, you little bastard. I thought you were a bear."

He ran up and nearly tackled me. "It's actually you! I didn't believe it when I heard from my dad that you were coming back, but then Newton gave me a ring and said that you all were taking a trip down today, and when he mentioned you…" the younger male let me go from his death grip and stepped back to look at me. "It's been ages. How do I look?"

It had been at least three years since I'd seen my friend, and I gave him an appraising look. He was younger than me by two years but he looked much older than fifteen, even though he was still shorter than me by about three inches. His skin was several shades darker than mine and absolutely flawless, and he'd let his thick, black hair grow out to his shoulders. Although I saw him as nothing more than a brother, I had to admit that he was handsome.

"You look good, Jake," I grinned. "I'm assuming it's not just coincidence you're here, then?"

Jake flopped next to me on the sand as I went and sat by the fire again. "Nope. Mike and his friends come down here all the time when the weather is good, and they always get drinks from our store. His cousin married Rebecca," he said, referring to his older sister. "If you remember her."

I thought back to the fishing trips our families had gone on together and nodded. "She's not much older than us. They must have really been in love."

"Head over heels," Jacob replied. He looked at me oddly for a moment, then poked at the sand with a stick. "Can you still fish barehanded, like I taught you?"

"I haven't fished in years. Not since… Well, since the last time I saw you."

We talked up a storm for a time-- about how our fathers were, what we'd been up to and how we'd missed one another. A few of the other kids from the reservation came down with drinks as Mike and the rest came back from swimming and hiking; they all mingled together and began to organize a game of volleyball. Mike waved to us and went with Jessica and Tyler up to the store Jacob's father owned to get more drinks and foodstuffs, while Erin, Angela and a couple others came to sit near the fire with us.

"Hi, Jacob," Lauren said as she sauntered up. I didn't miss the glance she gave the both of us. "Good to see you again."

"Sure," Jacob replied, giving her a smile that I knew didn't mean a thing. Apparently, Lauren was not exactly a popular person. "Bella, do you want to go for a walk? We can catch up on old times some more."

Lauren butted in to the conversation. "You two know one another?"

"Jake is an old friend," I stood up and brushed the sand off my jeans. "Our fathers have been friends for forever."

"I taught her how to fish barehanded," he added with pride, hopping up and heading off. "Come on, Bells. We can go to the tide pools."

We left as the others began to come back, heading out towards the rocky cliffs near the water; I was grateful for the peace and quiet. Although I hated the ocean, being with Jacob made it somewhat less of a worry, especially since he talked the entire way to the tide pools. I distracted myself from the crashing waves with his cheerfully told stories about fishing trips past, adding in my own commentary about some of the events… specifically, the last trip we were together, when our boat tipped and dumped me out into the shallow water.

"You totally would have drowned had it not been for me," Jacob said, striking a superhero-like pose.

I snickered. "It was less than five feet of water. I could have just stood up."

He deflated slightly. "But you have to admit, I am heroic."

"Yes. You were very brave, fighting off those evil trout."

Jacob helped pull me up the rocks to where the tide pools were; we flopped next to one of the larger ones and peered at the critters swimming around in the nature-made aquarium. We fell silent for a bit, both of us lost in our own thoughts. I reached out and carefully touched one of the bright orange starfish in the water, so many childhood memories coming back to me.

"Are you happy to be back?"

"I guess," I pulled my hand back from the water and dried it n my jeans. "I mean… I miss Phoenix. I wish I could be there, most days, but I have friends here and aside from almost getting crunched by Tyler's old van…"

His dark brown eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. "That sounds like a story, right there."

"It was back in September, when we got the freezing rain," I started, knowing how much of a sucker Jacob was for a story. "My friend Erin drove me to school like normal, but my medical bracelet came loose in the car, so I went back for it. Then this van comes out of nowhere and plows right towards me. I would have been squished for sure, but…" I hesitated. "Well. There was this boy, Edward Cullen, and he somehow managed to pull me out of the way. Lucky me, I guess."

The expression that came over Jacob's face when I mentioned Edward was unlike any expression I'd seen. "Cullen?"

"Yeah. His father was the doctor that treated me that day. What, you know him?"

"No, no," he said hastily. "Never mind, it's not important."

"Jacob."

He stared at me a moment, then looked towards the ocean. "The Cullens aren't allowed here. We're not supposed to talk about it, though. My father will get mad if I tell you."

I used the same look on Jacob that I had on Erin, crossing my arms and summoning as much irritation as possible to my tone of voice. "You know, everyone has been shifty about the Cullens since the day I got here. Now, I'm going to Seattle with him in a week, and if there's something I should know that you're hiding from me, I swear I'll--"

"Okay, I'll tell you," Jacob said quickly, waving his hands. "But you can't tell our dads that I told you. They've already been in arguments over it before, and if my dad knew you're making friends with a Cullen…" he shivered as some memory, then took a breath and sighed. "A lot of people on the reservation act like they've forgotten about it, or that they don't believe it, but… The Quileute tribe is a superstitious one. There's this tale we have, kept alive by the elders like my dad. It's about the cold ones."

A chill passed over my body. "The cold ones?"

Jacob caught on to my sudden unease, and apparently decided to make this as creepy of an experience as possible. "The cold ones," he whispered, mischief in his eyes as he spoke, "came here hundreds of years ago. They preyed upon the animals and our people, who could shape-shift into wolves, saw them as enemies. The cold ones entered an agreement with our elders that they would stay off our land, since no one could tell if it was an animal or a human that was being hunted until it was too late, in exchange for not telling outsiders about their existence. They say some of our people carry the knowledge of shape-shifting to this day, so the cold ones are still forbidden from entering the reservation."

I kept my tone skeptical, yet I could feel my heart beat faster. "So the Cullens are related to these cold ones."

"Nope. They are the same ones."

"Jacob," I said slowly, rubbing the chill from my arms and trying to sort out the piece that just fell onto the puzzle. "What exactly are the cold ones?"

He gave me a small, devious smile. "I believe they're what normal folk call vampires."

The new piece fell into place. The way they looked, the way they acted, how Edward had saved my life… So many things suddenly made sense. I stared at Jacob, my mind spinning in circles as the logical half of my brain tried to deal with this information. Shape-shifters? Vampires? That was the stuff of movies. It wasn't supposed to be real. But there was something in Jacob's eyes as he looked at me, something that told me that as much as he wanted to pass it off as a tall tale, he believed it. And if he believed it… It made it seem that much more possible.

"You have goosebumps," he grinned.

"You're a good storyteller."

"Not as good as my father, he's the one who told it to me…" Jacob said, his smile fading. "Do you believe it? The story?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Should I?"

Jacob was about to reply when a head suddenly popped up over the rocks. I'm not sure who screamed louder-- me, or him.

"Whoa," Mike said, looking startled at our extreme reaction. He glanced between us both, obviously rethinking our sanity. "Uh, I was just coming over to let you guys know that we're cooking some food down there. Are you guys okay up here?"

"Jacob was just telling me some ghost stories," I replied, putting a hand on my chest and giggling nervously. "We'll be right down, Mike. Thanks."

Giving Jacob a baleful look, Mike's head sunk back down among the rocks and vanished. Muttering to himself, Jacob stood up, helping me to my feet and making sure I didn't fall as we both descended down the rocks and back towards the beach. We didn't speak the entire way down, but once we got there, he held my hands in his and looked into my eyes.

"I've really missed you, Bells. I'm glad you're back. Promise me you'll be careful from now on, though."

I smiled slightly. "Why does everyone keep saying that?"

"You're like my sister. And if you're anything like me and the rest of my family, you're an absolute magnet for trouble," he grinned. A loud rumbling noise came from his stomach, and he glanced towards the campfire in the distance. "I bet I can eat more hotdogs than you."

"You're on."

Jacob took off towards the other, dragging me along with him through the sand. We laughed as we ran together, like old times… Yet even as we sat together among the group next to the fire, stuffing our faces as we all shared stories, I felt alone, an icy chill having settled in my bones. In the glowing red and gold of the fire I imagined I saw those amber eyes, watching me. I shivered, then glanced up; Jacob's gaze met mine, and the intensity behind the look was unnerving. We were alike, as he'd said-- and so I knew that, despite his laughter and cheerful way of going about life, there was something more behind it. In his heart, he was something other than he seemed… and I was slowly starting to wonder if perhaps that 'something' knew more about the world than I dared to imagine.

Truth is stranger than fiction, Mark Twain had once said. I was beginning to suspect, unfortunately for me, that the man was right.


	10. Chapter Nine

Charlie was waiting for me by the time I got home.

"I suppose I should be grateful that you have some sort of social life," he said as I walked in, sitting on the stairs. "Although I should be disappointed that you skipped school."

"I left you a note," I offered, trying to ignore the stern expression he was giving me. "Angela got my homework for Biology and Geometry, and Erin got my homework for me this morning in English class. I'm only missing my Government homework, and he usually just assigns reading for Fridays."

The police look faltered. "So you're caught up on your homework?"

I nodded. "I'm ahead in English and Biology."

After a moment, Charlie cracked a smile. "Did you have fun?"

"I didn't get eaten by seagulls, if that's what you mean. Jacob was there," I added. Now that I knew he wasn't going to skin me, I headed into the kitchen and began making Charlie dinner. "I guess he knows Mike from the other times they've been out to La Push. I stopped by their store on the way back-- Billy sends his regards and wants to know if you'll call him to go fishing sometime."

"I haven't spoken to Billy in a while," Charlie muttered wistfully. "Maybe I will give him a call. Can I help?"

I nearly bounced with joy as my father came in and helped me make cheeseburgers. Jacob had beaten me at eating hotdogs, considering I'd barely touched the one I'd been given. Charlie managed to not burn them, and we spent the rest of the night watching basketball together. It was a good distraction, and I stayed up long past Charlie in order to get my Geometry homework done. Somehow, I fell asleep on the sofa and woke up with Charlie's old quilt draped over me; I stretched, my shoulders stiff, and wandered into the kitchen to get breakfast.

It was Saturday, but I still called my doctor's office like I was supposed to have done the day before and left a message. I didn't want to even think about going to the doctor, but it was still something familiar and normal… a much better alternative to the other things I had lurking in the back of my mind. After making myself a slice of toast, I went back to the sofa and began to work on my English homework, a paper on Shakespeare. I chose to write about Lady MacBeth's soliloquy in Act I, Scene V, and how it tied in to Shakespeare's attitude toward women. I flipped to the scene, grabbed my pen and doodled absentmindedly in my notebook while I read over the text.

" _The raven himself is hoarse  
That croaks the fatal entrance of Duncan  
Under my battlements. Come, you spirits  
That tend on mortal thoughts, unsex me here…"_

I sighed, my eyes drawing back to the word 'mortal'. I closed the book and set it on the automan with my notebook, standing up and pacing like I had weeks before. Try as I might, Jacob's story wasn't leaving me alone, and my thoughts kept returning to it. Finally, I gave up and went upstairs, turning on my computer and waiting for it to load. I pulled up my search engine and bit my lip, my fingers hovering over the keyboard. I could still just turn the computer off and forget about it… couldn't I?

Shaking my head, I typed in the word 'vampire' and hit the search button. I was presented with over seventy million hits, and for a second I just stared at the screen. Where to start? Wikipedia, some wine company and a name generator made up the top three hits, and the rest seemed to be about various novels, movies or role-playing games; it didn't look very promising. I clicked on the Wikipedia site and read over it, growing more and more skeptical about any successful research as time went on. It was the same stuff I'd heard over and over before, for the most part-- some sort of dead person who had risen from the grave and was likely just a bunch of crap stemming from a lack of understanding of the process of decay and illnesses like the plague. The usual description was a bloated figure with a ruddy complexion, clad in a burial shroud and possessing long hair and fingernails; they could be killed by chopping off their heads, cutting out their heart and setting the heart on fire, stabbing the suspected vampire through the heart with a stake made of ash, hawthorn or oak wood, and various other complicated, gruesome rituals.

The most interesting part of what I did find was that most vampires were, in fact, women rather than men… which simply cast further suspicion upon the entire idea of vampires in general. I followed a few interesting links and read about the Babylonian myth of Lilitu, or Lillith, who seemed to be one of the first actual 'vampires' and fed on the blood of newborns. Then there were the vetalas, evil spirits from Hindu mythology who possessed corpses who were often sought as slaves by sorcerers and were capable of both killing children and guarding villages. A Roman legend talked about the strige, a blood-drinking creature in the shape of a bird, and a Greek one spoke of the fanged vrykolakas, which apparently applied to both vampire-like creatures and werewolves. Then there was an evil soul from Romanian mythology, and basically looked to be a 'witch' that feasted on the blood or energy of its victims. There were two types, the Strigoi Vii and the Strigoi Morti, the former being a living creature and the latter being an undead one. There was a related entity called the moroi, which seemed to be a phantom, a vampire, a werewolf, or a living child born from two vampires.

There were so many myths from so many different cultures that I couldn't focus on them all. I gave up on Wikipedia and surfed through various other sites, still finding nothing that matched the story Jacob told me nor anything that reminded me of the Cullens. There were plenty of decent sites, even a few about 'real vampires'… people who felt that they were vampires, even if they didn't fit the traditional view of them. Some called themselves 'sanguines', others called themselves 'psychic vampires'. It did seem related to the myths and legends, and I hated to admit that I felt myself getting more and more drawn into this world I never knew existed. It was intriguing and I knew that I would revisit it someday, but it wasn't what I was looking for and so I moved on.

I was about to just give up on the idea altogether in a fit of frustration, but I found one last word that caught my interest. The last link I followed led me to a creature called the dhampire. It was a role-playing website, but I copy-pasted the word into the search engine and found a couple sites-- Wikipedia again, and another site-- that offered up somewhat more legitimate information. Apparently, a dhampire was the offspring of a vampire and a mortal, and although the exact nature and description of them varied as much as any other myth, there were three ideas that immediately attracted my attention. They were sometimes described as being attractive and extremely pale, tall and thin, with dark smudges under their eyes; they possessed extraordinary strength and often became defenders, protecting people from harmful vampires despite the fact that they, too, drank blood.

I leaned back in my chair, staring out my window and towards the forest. I used my toe to click off the computer's power, not bothering to shut it down properly as I stood up and went towards the window. I leaned on the wall, watching the last bits of sunlight; the clouds were rolling in again. I wanted to do something, but it wasn't even ten o' clock in the morning and there was nowhere to go, regardless. Glancing at the woods, I went downstairs and grabbed my jacket, hugging it to my chest and I went across the street and stepped into the trees.

It had been too long since I'd actually taken a walk, and with my heavy, thick shoes, I knew I could brave the slightly muddy path I had found. I focused on the trees, with their rapidly turning leaves. There were reds, bright yellows, browns… I had to hand it to Forks, it was pretty in Autumn. Thanks to my outings with Charlie when I was younger, I could recognize most of the trees and a couple of the plants, although their exact names were lost in my blurred memory. The farther I ventured into the woods, the darker it got; the trees were so thick that when I barely noticed when it began to rain. It was only when I stopped to sit and rest on a fallen tree that I noticed the sudden mist that had moved in and settled among the trees.

Without the safety of the plastic, wood and cement confines of civilization, sitting in this fog-filled forest, it was easier to think. The canopy of branches and floor of moss, dirt and ferns was more of a comfort to me than any church my mother had dragged me to had been, and as I sat, breathing in the cold, crisp and earthy air, I felt my mind began to clear. Unfortunately, it was also within this forest, this timeless place that had seen more seasons than a good portion of the inhabitants that lived around it, that made it easier to believe everything that Jacob had said and the things that I had learned on my own.

Was it possible that the legends were true? Yes, it was possible. It wasn't probable, but that didn't remove it from the realm of possibility. The world wasn't completely explored, nor were all things in this world explained. Even if the stories were exaggerated, in all things there was a grain of truth… which meant that something like that could be out there. It meant that it was indeed possible that the Cullens could be vampires. Did I believe it? It was getting harder and harder not to believe that _something_ was going on, whether or not it had to do with some bloodsucking creature of the dark. And so far, to my dismay, it was the only theory I had that really worked.

I was suddenly angry at myself. How could I let myself believe such nonsense? My mother would pitch a fit if she knew the things I'd been reading about… Charlie probably would, too, even if he was more open-minded than most. If my own parents would freak out on me, then surely anyone else would have me carted off to the psych ward. Trying to get a second opinion was out of the question. All I had was my own iffy mind to try and solve this…

I wouldn't believe it until I had some sort of proof. I refused to confront Edward about it-- I would simply watch and wait. Eventually, something would come up. Until then, I would simply work under the idea that such a thing was one of many options, and take the proper precautions. Until I got proof, I would do nothing but carry on like normal. But even as I decided this, my mind wandered back to Amelia, the girl who'd died in Alaska. What if Edward had actually harmed her? I rubbed my temples, muttering curse-words to myself. No, he had saved my life. Regardless of who or what he really was, he was a good person.

"Damn it," I grumbled out loud as the rain became heavier, finally starting to trickle through the living roof above my head.

Standing, I stepped through the plants and back on to the path, taking note of the direction of my footprints and following them back. I could only see a few feet ahead of me in any direction thanks to the fog. I paused a moment, hearing a noise beyond the fog, then walked faster. I was sure that it was just my imagination, but the level of my panic increased the longer I walked; had I really gone so far into the forest? There were wild animals around Forks, and I'd heard about bears or mountain lions coming down from the mountains before… The rain grew heavier, but it at least cleared away the fog and I glanced around me, making sure that I was as alone as I'd thought. As the end of the trail and my home came into sight, I suddenly smelled something sweet; I looked over my shoulder, wondering what flower would be blooming this time of year.

There was nothing there but ferns and the odd blackberry vine. I blinked, wrapping my arms around myself and stepping out into the street. My panic faded as I walked across the pavement and reached my door, going inside and locking the door behind me. I closed my eyes and took a slow, deep breath before taking off my shoes and jacket, and heading into the living room to finish my English paper. Lady MacBeth seemed just a little less creepy than before.

* * * * *

Mike and Erin dropped by on Sunday to get help… or in Erin's case, give help… with various homework assignments. We managed to explain several English concepts to Mike, and Erin somehow got me to understand a few Geometry terms. Both of them helped me with Spanish, making flash cards out of yellow, orange and pink sticky notes. We ordered pizza and watched some animated show called Code Geass, and I decided that there actually were some decent shows on television.

When Monday rolled around, I had managed to get ahead in Geometry, but I was still miserably behind in Government and Spanish. Erin tried to help me while we drove to school, tossing out random words, but I knew I was going to flunk the Government quiz the teacher had planned for the day, unless I learned by some miracle the full names of the last twenty presidents in about an hour. I slunk to English and at least felt good about turning in my paper early. The rest of that class was spent staring out the window and doodling; I focused on one of the birch trees outside, the wispy, inked branches trailing across my page and turning into obscure symbols within the paper's margins.

The thought of seeing Edward today made my palms sweat. I worked my bottom lip between my front teeth, doodling a pair of flat black eyes peering from behind the tree. I wanted to see him-- I longed to look into those eyes again and perhaps, armed with this new information, see if I could find something about him that I'd not noticed before. I wanted to see his smile. It was stupid to be so eager to be around him, and yet I couldn't get him out of my head.

As lunch drew closer, my anxiety grew. The test in Government added to the stress, and by the time my fourth class released us to lunch, I was a walking ball of strung-out nerves. Jessica seemed to pick up on it, much like Angela had in Geometry class, and she invited me to go to Port Angeles for dress shopping wither her, Angela and Lauren; they were going to leave after school. I was about to refuse, but then we walked into the lunchroom, and my heart broke at the clear absence of any Cullens. Well, there went my day…

"Bella?" Jessica prompted from behind me in the lunch line.

"I'll ask my dad," I grumbled.

My answer seemed to appease Jessica, and I spent the rest of lunch pouting as she excitedly squealed about the dance and the department store. After lunch, I used Angela's cell phone to call my dad on our way to Biology class. He agreed to let me go with the others, and that was the end of that. I sighed, handing the phone back to Angela. My disappointment grew deeper as I saw the empty seat beside mine. I had held out hope that perhaps Edward would show up for Biology, but as the minutes ticked by, that hope faded away.

The rest of the school day was promptly tuned out. I was happy when the final bell rang; some distraction was better than none, even if said distraction involved clothes I'd never think of wearing and Lauren, who looked crabby as usual. We all threw our things into Jessica's trunk and piled into the white Taurus. It would take about an hour to get to Port Angeles, and we would spend a few hours scouring the department store and surrounding shops before getting dinner at a pizza place and heading home. It would be a simple, fun trip to take my mind off the Cullens and off stupid vampire stories.

… At least, that had been the plan.


	11. Chapter Ten

“And Iiiiiiii will alwaaaays love yoooooou…”

Lauren, like Angela and I, had covered her ears. “Do you HAVE to sing along?”

Jessica took a moment from her wailing to reply. “Oh, come on. I should totally go on American Idol. I’d so win.”

The bickering started up again, and Angela gave me a pained look. It was the third argument in the last half hour, the first one being over what music to listen to and the second one being over whether or not rap music actually counted as music. Jessica finally stopped when Lauren threatened to leap out the window and walk home, settling for humming along with the music instead of shrieking. I sighed in relief, dropping my hands from my ears and resting the back of my head against the car seat. 

Somehow, we managed to get to Port Angeles without further incident. The winding roads that lead through the trees and cliffs smoothed out as we turned the last corner and entered the charming, clean-looking tourist trap of a town. I’d been there with Charlie enough to know that the bright, sparkling surface Port Angeles showed to visitors was fairly superficial. Beyond the pristine beaches, the golfing and the pretty houses in the hills, there was a startling amount of crime. It was a pretty town, but I made a mental note to be careful and I made sure that I had added my little thing of pepper-spray to my keychain.

Most of the town was fairly dead this time of the year, so parking was a breeze. Jessica decided to start out at Wal-Mart for some odd reason, and I was a bit surprised by her thrift when it came to shopping. Angela, trying not to look embarrassed, decided to pick up a strapless bra, while the others picked out a couple things completely unrelated to the dance. I found a cheap recipe book that I picked up as a gift to Charlie when the holidays rolled around. We moved on to Landings Mall afterwards, and it proved to be a success in finding dresses.

“Oooh,” Jessica cheered after about fifteen minutes of digging around, finding a little blue number that made her eyes look unreal. “What do you think of this one?”

“It’s amazing,” I replied. “Mike’s going to drop at your feet.”

She grinned, giving me an armful of her rejected choices. “I really wish you would go to the dance. It’s not like you need a date…”

I put the dresses back on the racks. “I know. I’m just not big on dances is all.”

“Big enough on them to go with Tyler to the prom,” Lauren growled from a row over, holding a green dress up to herself and glaring at the mirror.

I stared at Lauren. “Wait, what?”

Jessica tapped her chin, glancing between me and Lauren and likely wondering if she was going to have to save one of us from the other. “Tyler told us that he asked you to the prom and was going to take you.”

“I’m going to kill him,” I seethed.

“I told you it wasn’t true,” Angela piped up from a dressing room.

Lauren looked at me in the mirror, her gaze wary. “He didn’t ask you out?”

“No!”

“And you didn’t agree to go?”

I threw my hands up into the air. “You caught me. I’m lying. I have this sinister plot to steal your crush and make you hate me.”

The two blonds exchanged a look, then Lauren shrugged. “Well… I guess I was mistaken, then,” she grumbled, running off to a dressing room.

Angela peered out, then teetered towards us in a stunning, off the shoulders dress in a light pink, with chunk pink heels to match. My jaw dropped a bit at how gorgeous and feminine she looked with her hair down.

“How is this?” she asked shyly, the blush on her cheeks just adding to the overall effect.

“I think I have a friendcrush on you,” Jessica said, apparently as shocked as I was. “If you don’t get those, I’ll have to kill you with my bare hands.”

“Agreed,” I nodded when Angela looked to me for my opinion. “It’s a really nice color on you.”

Still blushing, she nearly ran over Lauren as the taller girl came out in a low-cut, strappy green thing with a black, gothic looking scarf and black shoes. If anyone could pull it off, it was Lauren. while they checked out and decided to head to the car and to another little store nearby, I opted to find a bookstore. There was one within less than a mile from the mall and it would require me to go a bit farther away from the others than I was comfortable, but I figured it would be okay and agreed to meet them at the restaurant in a few hours.

I left the mall and began my walk, putting my hands inside the pouch of my hoodie to keep them warm. It was cold again, and the total cover of clouds threatened more rain. I sighed, looking in the shop windows as I passed them. I had left a great deal of my stuff back in Phoenix, and I felt a stab of nostalgia as I saw a little ceramic cactus sitting on the windowsill of one of the little stores. Once I was done with school at Forks, I knew I would move back to Phoenix and go to college there. I wasn’t going to stay in Washington forever… but two years still seemed too long. Perhaps I would go visit once summer returned and school let out.

Glancing at the directions I’d written for myself, I frowned at the street names and took a turn. Perhaps walking hadn’t been the best idea, seeing as how I knew next to nothing about the area, but I figured I could always get directions from people if I got lost. I took another turn and wound up in the wrong area, so I backtracked and kept going straight along the road, but the only store that looked remotely like a bookstore was some little metaphysical shop. I paused before going in, smiling weakly at the woman at the counter. She was older with long, gray hair and a tie-die shirt, and she was sitting there with a chunk of crystal in each hand… eccentric, for sure, but she seemed friendly enough. I glanced at the books on Wicca and witchcraft, snagged a random book on ‘rock magic’ and headed to the counter.

“Uhm, hi. I’m trying to find this store…” I handed her the slip of paper with the address on it after she rang up my book. “Can you help me?”

“Sure,” she replied, slipping on a pair of glittery glasses and peering at my slightly illegible writing. “Hm. I think you need to go about three or four blocks down, then go right and go another few blocks.”

“Oh, thanks.”

She pulled a rock out from a bin and plunked it on the counter. “Here you go, dearie,” the woman said with another cheerful smile. “Something to start you out.”

I picked up the rock. It was dark green with flecks of red, and I looked at the woman. “What is it?”

“Bloodstone. I think you’ll like it.”

“Thank you,” I said, slipping the rock into my bag. I suppose I’d have to read that book now, just to figure out why a stranger would think a rock would be any use to me. “Have a good night.”

I escaped from the store as quickly and gracefully as possible, trying not to think of what my father would say if he found the book. First it was vampires, now magic rocks. Great…

Grumbling to myself, I went down a few more blocks, growing a bit uneasy as it began to get darker. It didn’t help that I was getting closer to an industrial area that I knew wasn’t the best place to be. I should have gone back to the woo-woo shop and asked to use the woman’s phone, but since she said it wasn’t that far away, I pressed on at a little faster pace. I was about to turn the corner when I almost crashed into a group of guys coming my direction.

“Sorry!” I babbled, quickly stepping around them. “So sorry, wasn’t watching where I was going, sorry.”

One of the taller ones eyed me as I went past, and I felt my blood go cold. “Lost, sugar?”

Stupidly, I replied, stopping a few feet away. “Erm, I’m looking for the bookstore. It’s this way, right?”

Another of the guys smiled. “Why don’t you come with us? We’ll be glad to show you.”

“No thanks,” I replied, a red flag raising itself up in my mind. I turned and walked, not looking back as I sped up even more. After I got a few paces away, I glanced over my shoulder, and I felt my heart leap up into my throat as I realized that three of the four men were following me.

I darted down one of the side streets, thinking that perhaps I could double back and go to that store. The 60’s woo-woo lady didn’t seem that bad anymore. I dug around in my hoodie pouch and pulled out my keys, doing what my father had taught me. I slipped a key between each finger, gripping them tightly as I made a fist. I put my pepper-spray in my other hand; I wouldn’t go down without a fight. But if I could make it to one of the stores-- all the ones around me were closed for the night-- I wouldn’t need to fight at all. Solar plexus, instep, nose, groin… Isn’t that what the lady on Miss Congeniality had said to remember? Damn it.

I turned down another street, and it seemed slightly familiar. The back of the shop was down a small alleyway to the right of me, so if I could just make it around the next corner… My foot caught on a raised edge in the sidewalk and I tripped in my haste, falling to my hands and knees. I tried not to cry as blood welled up from the scrapes on my palms, my vision blurring with tears as I struggled to my feet. 

“Aw, the poor thing fell,” one of the men called mockingly from behind me. “Come back so we can take care of you, baby.”

Suddenly, another man came from around the corner, and I recognized him as the one who had broken away from the other three earlier… and I realized that I’d fallen directly into a trap. I was only about five or so yards from both the men behind me and the one in front of me… if I bolted, I could likely make it down the alley and hopefully bang on the back door of the shop, if it was even open. I could try and push past the one man and fight my way into traffic, too; knowing my luck I’d likely get hit by a car, but it was better than whatever these people had in mind for me. I cursed my stupidity and mentally prepared myself for whatever was about to come…

“Leave her alone,” a smooth, calm voice said from the growing shadows.

I looked to my right, freezing as a man stepped from an alleyway, pulling me behind him as he grabbed my wrist and placed himself directly between them and me. I felt like an electrical current was going through me; his touch was so cold that it almost burned, and I found myself completely unable to move. All I could do was close my eyes, try to breath, and tremble.

“We’re just having some fun, pal,” another of the men said. “You gonna stop us?”

“I’m going to snap your necks if you don’t back off, is what I’m going to do,” my savior replied with a chilling calmness, and the terrible, vicious edge to his tone left no doubt that he meant it… and wouldn’t hesitate to follow through.

Anything the men said or did after that, I didn’t hear or see. I was shaking so hard that my teeth were chattering, and I simply walked when the man gently turned me and pushed me along somewhere. He put his arm around my shoulder as we walked, and he finally spoke to me in a softer voice.

“Where are you supposed to be right now?”

“Gordy’s,” I managed to whimper, tears returning to my eyes. “With my friends… the police. We have to call them and…”

“I’ll take care of it,” the man interrupted me. “Let’s just get you somewhere safe, alright?”

I let him guide me, falling silent. My hands shook, and pulled them to my chest; I could feel my heart pounding. I became more and more aware of the surroundings as we walked, and soon, the shops we passed looked familiar. Finally, the restaurant’s sign appeared a few blocks away and I exhaled, suddenly remembering to breathe. The man walked me within a block of the door, and I nearly cried in relief as I saw Angela.

“Here we are. See anyone you recognize?”

I nodded, then looked at the man for the first time as my panic began to dissipate. He was my height, perhaps five-foot-ten, his build hidden by ragged-looking khakis and a thick, brown leather jacket. His hair, pulled into a ponytail, was honey blond; his eyes were masked by black, mirrored sunglasses, but from his hair and his pale, almost translucent skin, I would have guessed them to be blue. The man was not much older than me and handsome, and I considered inviting him to dinner out of sheer gratitude. 

“Would you like to eat? My treat, as a thank you,” I offered, so relieved at being alive that talking to a complete stranger and dragging him off for pizza wasn’t even a concern.

He smiled. “A kind offer, but I have some business I need to attend to, hm?”

I remembered the energy I’d felt go through me at his touch and the dark, malicious way he had spoken to my would-be attackers; I shivered. “Oh. Well, thank you. Again.”

“Next time, be more cautious,” the man said quietly as I walked away. “You never know what is waiting for you in the twilight.”

I paused and looked over my shoulder; my heart almost stopped. He was gone. I stared at the spot where the man had stood, then wrapped my arms around myself and walked as fast as I could towards the restaurant. Angela, who was still standing outside, nearly had a fit when she saw me.

“Bella! Where were y… Oh my god, are you okay?”

“I’ll tell you about it inside,” I mumbled.

I gave them the shortened version as they shoved pizza and soda down my throat, huddling around me; I left out the part about the man. Lauren, to my surprise, left to go to the local supermarket and get me some band-aids for my hands. Jessica threatened to call my dad and the police, but I told them that someone already was doing that-- which was true. The man had said he would take care of it. Once I had some grease and sugar in me, and after I’d gotten my injuries bandaged up, I felt better. The three kept me close the rest of the evening, especially as we walked to the car. Angela allowed me to cling to her arm the entire ride home. Their protectiveness was comforting. 

The drive back to Forks turned out to be a long one. As we left Port Angeles, police cars lined the winding road back, and there were flaggers out directing traffic. I looked out the window as I noticed the flares and the yellow tape along the trees. There was a car laying down the cliff, the entire front end smashed all the way into the windshield. The sides of the car were mashed in.

“Oh my gods,” I whispered, feeling faint as I thought I saw blood spattered across the shattered remains of the windows.

“Ew,” Jessica said, lacking tact as usual. “Probably some dumb drunk drivers.”

Lauren flipped on the radio, and we listened to the music the rest of the way home. Although I generally disliked pop music, the easy lyrics served as a distraction from tonight’s events. We finally arrived at my house around ten o’clock, and Angela graciously walked me through the darkness to my door.

“Thanks for everything tonight, Angela,” I said as we got out of the car. “I don’t know what I’d do without you guys.”

“No problem,” she smiled. “It’s what friends are for, after all.”

I was about to go inside, but I hesitated. “Hey, Angela? Did you see anyone following me when I came to Gordy’s?”

She shook her head. “When I saw you, you were alone. Why? Do you think the people were stalking you?”

“Nah. It’s nothing, really… I’m just paranoid. See you tomorrow, Angela.”

“Goodnight.”

I stepped inside and shut the door, my feeling of apprehension growing as my father stood up from the sofa and walked from the living room to the stairs; he was watching me intently.

“I’m glad you’re home,” he said, glancing into the living room. “There was a nasty accident on the road heading towards Forks, and I was worried.”

“Oh,” I blinked. “Uhm. Yeah, we passed that one the way back. That was pretty fast… I didn’t see any news vans out there.”

Charlie frowned, then want back to the sofa and nodded at the television. “It happened about three hours or so ago. I figured you were already there and you did say you weren’t coming home until later, but…”

I sat down on the sofa next to him after I took off my jacket and shoes. “It’s okay, I know you worry.”

He reached for the remote control and noticed my hands. “What happened…?”

“Nothing much,” I said, feeling guilty. I knew I wouldn’t tell him about what happened; he was already stressed enough. “I tripped on a chunk of sidewalk.”

“There’s some antiseptic and stuff up in your drawer in the bathroom,” he replied. “I got it for you when I went to the store today. Ah, here’s the story again…”

I followed my father’s gaze as he turned up the news, and looked at the television. The reporter was hard to understand-- there was a lot of static-- but I managed to catch the jist of it. The driver, probably drunk, had been speeding along the roads and had apparently lost control after hitting an animal. The car had been flung off the road and rolled. All four occupants were declared dead at the scene, the reporter had said, and I felt my stomach lurch as their pictures were plastered across the screen.

“I think I’m going to bed,” I said as cheerfully as possible, even though I wanted to throw up. “Night, dad.”

Charlie seemed startled at my sudden departure, but nodded and smiled. “Night, sweetie.”

When I got to my bedroom, I shut the door and sat on my bed, my hands over my mouth. I stared out the window into the darkness. If this was the Universe’s way of getting me to accept my new reality, I was convinced. I had Jacob’s phone number in my wallet, and I considered calling him. No, it was too late, and what would I say? ‘Oh, hey, about those vampires, turns out your great-grandfather was telling the truth’? He’d think I was nuts… Or would he? The way he looked at me that night, I would have sworn that he believed it, too. But I couldn’t drag him into this, either way. People were dead. 

My logical brain tried to struggle with the situation I was facing, and I was forced to consider that it was a coincidence. Yes, four men had attempted to attack me. Yes, a stranger had saved me, and had promised to take care of it. Yes, those four men were now dead. Did that mean that all of it was related? No, and it certainly didn’t mean that vampires were involved. The driver was drunk, the news report had said. It was an accident. They just went to fast, hit an animal and…

…And what sort of animal caused the entire front end of a car to get smashed into the front seat?

I rubbed my wrist, imagining I felt the man’s ice cold hand on my skin again. The cold ones. I shuddered. 

Suddenly, the material between me and the outside world seemed pathetically lacking. I took a blanket and went over to my window, rigging it up. It made me feel slightly better, but I noted that I’d have to ask my father tomorrow for some good, solid blinds rather than the flimsy, transparent curtains. I turned on the little lamp next to my bed for the first time since I’d arrived in Forks as I got into bed and closed my eyes; I curled up under the covers and childishly pretended that the soft light would make me safe. I had the sinking suspicion that it wouldn’t keep the real monsters away.


	12. Chapter Eleven

     Edward was in the parking lot by the time Erin and I got to school the next morning, standing next to his stupid Volvo and looking like he had been waiting for us. Erin pulled into our usual parking space, giving the other boy a glance. I shooed Erin off to class as we got out, turning to Edward, steeling my nerves and approaching him.  
  
     “We need to talk,” I said lowly, looking him directly in the eyes. “And it absolutely cannot wait until Friday.”  
  
     “I agree,” he replied; the ease of the answer was baffling. “Meet me outside the cafeteria before lunch, and we’ll talk.”  
  
     I frowned and searched his face for any clues. “That’s it? You’re not going to argue about it?”  
  
     He glanced towards the forest, pursing his lips and letting out a slow breath. “Things have changed. You’re going to be late for class if you don’t go.”  
  
     It pained me to leave him, but I turned and made my way to English. I was a few minutes late and received an extra homework assignment for it. I didn’t care-- my mind was on Edward Cullen, and I felt like jumping up on my desk and doing a dance. He wanted to talk to me! In private! Was it possible I could finally get some answers? After last night, I fully planned on demanding them. My hands hurt to write with, and I was still shaken. As happy as I was to get to talk to Edward, he was going to tell me what was going on, even if I had to wrap my hands around his pasty little neck and strangle it out of him.  
  
     Erin and Mike tried to talk to me, but I was too distracted to pay close attention. I felt badly after class and promised to call them both later. I had to make the same promise to Angela in Geometry, and Jessica in Spanish. I was so busy focusing on what I was going to say to Edward that I barely heard anyone else, including the teachers. I drummed my fingers as the clock ticked closer to lunch, and finally, Spanish class was over.  
  
     “What’s up with you?” Jessica asked as we left the building.  
  
     I blushed. “Oh, uhm… I have to talk to someone before lunch today. Sorry I’m being such a flake.”  
  
     Jessica looked at Edward we neared the cafeteria, her eyes widening slightly when he waved at me. “Is there something going on that I should know about?”  
  
     “Well…”  
  
     She put her hand over my mouth. “No, no, not now. Call me later. You just go do your thing. Gods, it’s about time you finally…” Jessica’s words trailed into inaudible muttering as she headed off by herself.  
  
     Edward smiled at me as I walked up, and I nearly melted into a puddle at his feet. “Hey,” he greeted me with that amazing voice of his, waving his hand at the bench. “Care to join me?”  
  
     “Of course.” I sat down, talking once most of the students had vanished into the cafeteria. “Let me start by saying that I know something is up,” I said, barely able to look into his golden eyes without flailing madly inside. “I know you’re hiding something, and I have a few guesses as to what it is… But I want to hear it from you.”  
  
     He looked down, poking lightly at a leaf that had fallen from a nearby tree with his toe. “What are your guesses?”  
  
     “I’ve considered that maybe you’re secretly Clark Kent,” I started, keeping my gaze on him and watching for his reaction. “But so far you haven’t set anything on fire with your mind, so that’s probably not it.”  
  
     Smiling slightly, he picked up the leaf and twirled it between his fingers. “That’s definitely not it.”  
  
     “I thought not.”  
  
     “So, sans comic book characters, you really don’t have a clue.”  
  
     “Not quite. There was another story I heard,” I hesitated as he glanced up at me, “from a friend. He’s part of the Quileute tribe.”  
  
     The leaf stopped twirling in Edward’s hand, and the lack of emotion in his eyes stirred suspicion in the pit of my stomach. “And what story is that?”  
  
     I took a breath, and finally took a step towards the answer I had feared. “The story of the cold ones.”  
  
     “You think I’m a vampire,” he said flatly. A statement, not a question. Either I was right, or he thought I was insane.  
  
     “I never said vampire,” I replied, and I could see his jaw clench. “Which is interesting in and of itself.”  
  
     “Do you believe the story?”  
  
     “Is it true?”  
  
     Edward stared at me a moment, the slowly sat the leaf down on my head. “Your friend Jessica wants to know if you’re asking me out today. She thinks that it’s about time you got yourself a boyfriend, but she’s a bit jealous. And worried.”  
  
     “She thinks?” I asked, my mind suddenly spinning as I realized his lack of answering my other question might have been an answer unto itself.  
  
     “Once I’ve seen someone, I can generally hear their thoughts quite clearly. The farther away they are, the harder it is to hear, but if it’s someone I’m familiar with I can at least hear some whispers even if they’re far away.”  
  
     “Can all of you do that?”  
  
     He shook his head. “Just me. The others have their own talents. Carlisle… my father… his theory is that our strongest talents are heightened when we…” Edward hesitated. “When we become what we are.”  
  
     I looked down at my hands; my thoughts were so jumbled, I didn’t know where to start. “So, I was right.”  
  
     “Unfortunately.”  
  
     “So…” I ran my hands through my hair, sighing. “Garlic, crosses? Is any of that true?”  
  
     “Thankfully, no. Most of what you see in the movies has little to no basis in reality. Most of it was inspired by religion, and not practicality. Of course, fire and all that is treated with care… We’re a hardy breed, but not entirely invincible.”  
  
     “And sunlight?”  
  
     “That,” he sighed, “is somewhat based on fact. Although it was exaggerated. I’ve yet to see any of our kind turned into a walking barbeque grill just from taking an afternoon stroll.”  
  
     I bit my lip as I met his gaze, thinking. “Do you have other… talents, like some of the legends say? I mean, obviously you’re fast, and strong…”  
  
     “Well, we don’t turn into bats, if that’s what you mean.”  
  
     “Why did you save me, anyhow?” I asked suddenly. “I thought you hated me, the way you looked at me the first day of school. So why keep me from getting smushed?”  
  
     Edward frowned. “Like I said, you remind me of someone I knew once. I didn’t want to let you go, because… Because I feel an attraction to you. You turned my world upside down, and I hated it.  Being around you is difficult. My family and I… We’re not like others. We take from animals instead of humans, and that’s why the Quileuts made us leave their land-- so we didn’t accidentally kill one of their people. That doesn’t mean it’s not… tempting.”  
  
     My heart thumped faster at his words, and I blurted out the first thing that came to mind in order to keep myself focused. “You mean that they really were shapeshifters?”  
  
     “And of all the things to shock you, that’s it?”  
  
    “Yes,” I admitted. “I’d spent the week preparing myself for the idea of… of you being what you are. I finally accepted it last night, and I’ve lived off vampire books and movies my entire life, so it seemed easier to believe than people who turn into animals. But since my reality is already completely shattered…” I sighed. “Why not werewolves, too.”  
  
     “And you’re not at all worried about our dietary habits?”  
  
     I looked at my feet. “I tend to trust people that save my life.”  
  
     “For someone so smart,” he said quietly, “you’re awfully stupid. I could hurt you so easily. You should be running off screaming right now. You should be making plans to move back to Phoenix and get as far away from here as possible. And yet, here you are. Aren’t you even scared?”  
  
     “I’m always scared. You get used to it after a while.”  
  
     Edward watched me a moment, then picked up my hand and held it in his. That cold, icy touch seemed all too familiar, and yesterday’s events came back to my mind. “What are you thinking?”  
  
     “I thought you could hear people’s thoughts?”  
  
     He smiled a bit, and the back of my mind let out a feeble whimper of desire. “That’s the odd thing, the thing that I first noticed about you… As hard as I try, I can’t hear your thoughts. Not even a whisper. I wonder why that is…?”  
  
     I put my hand on the other side of his, not answering that last question. “I’m wondering why you finally decided to tell me about this,” I said, gently touching his skin. It felt almost like stone; he was like some Greek god, carved from marble. “Or even why you’ve told me at all.”  
  
     “As I said earlier,” he said quietly, gently pulling his hand from mine. “Things have changed. How I feel about you, the depth of your involvement… and other circumstances.”  
  
     “You said there were others… not like you and your family. Does that have something to do with this?”  
  
     “I can’t really say, Bella,” Edward replied. “All I know is… I feel protective of you. I want to keep you safe. There are things out there even I can’t explain, and you’re only human. It’s easier to keep my eye on you if you know about my family than if you don’t.”  
  
     “I can take care of myself, you know.”  
  
     Edward smiled slightly, reaching out and lightly brushing his fingers across my cheek. “Not that well. Not well enough to keep yourself alive out there.”  
  
     My heart stopped, and I sat there stunned as he stood up and brushed the leaves and dirt from his hands. He offered me his hand and I took it; it was only for the briefest moment that he let me stand close to him before moving away, but it was enough to set my heart off and pounding again.  
  
     “You’re actually not scared,” he murmured, searching my expression. “This is a mistake-- a dangerous mistake. No matter what you heard from your friend, no matter what you’ve seen or read, this isn’t just a legend. It’s not a book or a movie. You could get hurt… I could hurt you.”  
  
     “It doesn’t matter to me what you are,” I replied. “You’re still the same person to me, human or not.”  
  
    “It should matter.”  
  
     I opened my mouth to reply, but just then the bell rang. “What should I do about Jessica? You said she thinks we’re dating…”  
  
     “Well, we don’t want to disappoint Jessica, do we?” Edward gave me that disarming, brilliant smile of his. “We should get going. Come on.”  
  
     He held out his hand again. I stared at him, hesitating only a moment before doing a small dance of glee inside as I took his hand. Armed with new knowledge, an adventure and possibly my dreams come true, I smiled and followed the vampire without hesitation.  
  
*  *  *  *  *  
  
     It was ridiculous how quickly the word spread that the gorgeous, aloof Cullen boy was going out with the unworthy and far less attractive Miss Arizona. The first whispers started in Biology-- Angela raised her eyebrows curiously at me as Edward and I walked into class together, and although Mike hid it well, I could tell he was silently fuming. I gave them both a faint smile, and tried to ignore a couple of the other girls in my class… friends of Lauren… as they stared at me before muttering amongst themselves. By the end of the day, it seemed like half the school knew. Edward walked me to gym class; it was the first time I had walked with anyone other than Mike, and I couldn’t say that I felt guilty. I was on cloud nine, and my heart fluttered in my chest as Edward lightly touched my shoulder before he left for his own class. I practically floated up the bleacher, taking my usual place and somehow managing to focus on my homework long enough to get my extra English assignment done.  
  
     “So, is it true?” Mike asked as he wandered over during break. “You and Cullen, I mean.”  
  
     I blushed, looking down at my hands. “Is it a problem?”  
  
     “I’m not your father,” he said, tossing me the badminton birdie. “As long as you’re happy, you know? Just don’t forget about us little folk.”  
  
     Tossing the birdie back, I grinned.  
  
     Erin was strangely tightlipped most of the way home, and I could feel a tension between us I hadn’t felt before. It took me a while to get up the courage, but I finally managed to formulate a coherent thought that didn’t sound overly hostile.  
  
     “Is there something wrong, Erin?”  
  
     He glanced over at me, then back to the road. “No, everything is fine. Really. I must be zoning out, sorry.”  
  
     “Is it because of me and Edward?” I asked. He couldn’t lie very well.  
  
     Erin’s hands tightened on the steering wheel. “Why do you say that?”  
  
     “Because the entire school probably knows by now, and you were acting fine up until lunch. Plus you haven’t mentioned World of Warcraft yet, and that means there MUST be something wrong.”  
  
     “I’m just worried,” he finally replied. “I don’t want you to become one of these girls that gets totally sucked in by a guy just because he’s nice to you.”  
  
     I tried to ignore the slight sting that caused my ego. “I promise I won’t be as dorky tomorrow. I’m sure in a few weeks the novelty will have worn off and we’ll be ready to kill one another.”  
  
     He frowned. “Please don’t say that.”  
  
     The tone of his voice made me shiver, and I looked down at my hands as we pulled up to my house. “I’m sorry,” I apologized, even though I wasn’t sure why I was doing so. “But really, don’t worry about me. Things will be fine.”  
  
     “I’m just worried about his reputation, Bella,” Erin murmured as I got out of the car.  
“You’re one of my few friends. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”  
  
     “And I’ll be one of your friends forever,” I grinned, peeking through the rolled-down window. “Thanks for the concern though. It’s sweet.”  
  
     Erin looked at me through his small-framed glasses; he wanted to say something else, I could tell, but he just gave me a slight smile and nodded. I stepped back and waved as he pulled a u-turn and drove home. My hand dropped to my side and I made my way to the door after a quick glance at the forest. The phone was ringing inside, so I didn’t have much time to think about Erin’s words; it was my mother, and I was all for talking to her… even if just to distract myself from the uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach.  
  
     We talked for a solid hour about Phil and his career. Apparently things weren’t going too well, and they were planning on moving back to Arizona soon if he didn’t get a job soon. I mostly just let her talk, opting to listen; the fewer questions about my current life and situation, the better. Eventually she ran out of things to talk about and Phil was calling her for dinner, so she decided to be merciful and asked me to simply e-mail her if I had stuff I wanted to talk about. I’d just hung up with my mother when the phone rang again, and this time it was Jessica, who apparently was foaming at the mouth trying to get the ‘real story’ of what was going on between Edward and I.  
  
     “I must know,” she declared the moment I said hello, “what is going on between you and that gorgeous hunk of man. Spill.”  
  
     I smacked my palm to my face. “Jessica, there’s… nothing really going on yet. We--”  
  
     “Yet?” Jessica prompted.  
  
     “We’re not really official, you know?” I said, wandering to the kitchen and grabbing some stuff out of the fridge for dinner. “It’s not like we’ve been out on a date or anything. I’m fairly sure I like him more than he likes me at this point, really, but he offered to take me to Seattle this Saturday so I suppose we’ll just see what happens.”  
  
     “But is it an actual date?”  
  
     It would be easier if it were, so that is how I replied. “Yeah, I think so. He seemed happy to be taking me.”  
  
     “Wow,” she whistled. “Who would have thought you’d manage to rope Edward Cullen? I’m impressed.”  
  
     “Rope?” A giggle escaped my throat as I tried to imagine anyone trying to lasso a vampire. “Honestly Jessica, he’s a guy, not a horse.”  
  
     “Well,” her tone suddenly became devious. “That’s a matter of perspective.”  
  
     I blushed madly. “Jessica!”  
  
     “Whaaat?” she drawled innocently. “Oh, hey. Guess what? Mike asked me out to dinner before the dance on Saturday. Aaah!”  
  
     The change in subject was unexpected but welcome, and I eagerly began shifting the conversation towards the relationship between her and Mike rather than me and Edward. If there was one thing Jessica liked to talk about more than boys, clothes and soap operas, it was herself. I helped her plan exactly what to wear down to nail polish, what food she could eat without getting a stomachache, mouthwash, and about a hundred other things I couldn’t even imagine worrying about.  
  
     By the time I got off the phone, made dinner and took a shower, I was so sapped of energy that I flopped into bed without bothering with my homework. I was asleep before my head even hit the pillow.  
  
* * * * *  
  
     I woke up groggy from my odd dream, rubbing my eyes and fumbling around in the dim light as a ringing noise came from somewhere in the room. I could have sworn someone had been there with me, the dream had been so realistic… I rubbed my eyes again and peered at the clock. It wasn’t even dawn yet-- Charlie would have been gone by now, so where was the noise coming from?  
  
     “Are you going to answer this?”  
  
     A strangled scream burst from my throat and I scooted back up against the bed’s headboard. Edward was leaning against the wall across the room, dangling the cordless phone which was, of course, ringing. I pressed my hand to my chest, trying to slow my heartbeat. By the time I decided I wasn’t going to keel over, the phone had stopped ringing, and Edward was looking amused.  
  
     “What… how… Did Charlie let you in?” I asked faintly, knowing there was no way Charlie was going to let a boy into the house, let alone leave one alone with me in my bedroom at five o’clock in the morning.  
  
     “You really should call Erin back,” Edward said with a smirk. “He’s going to get worried.”  
  
     I held out my shaking hand, staring at Edward as he walked over, dropped the phone in my hand and sat patiently on the floor. “Uhm… Erin?”  
  
     “He’s sick and is trying to get a hold of you before school so you can find a ride.”  
  
     “Oh. Oh!” I jumped when the phone began to ring again. I quickly picked it up, still staring at Edward. “Hello?”  
  
     Sure enough, Erin was on the other end, sounding raspy. “Hey, Bella? It’s Erin. I’m sorry, but I’m sick or something… I’m staying home today.”  
  
     “Wow, must be some bug if you’re missing school,” I replied with sympathy. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll find a ride.” I eyed Edward. “You focus on getting better soon, okay? I’ll be sure to take notes in English today and get them to you.”  
  
     “Alright. Thanks.”  
  
     I hung up the phone and set it down on the bed, feeling my cheeks flush as I realized I was in my pajamas, alone, with a boy in the room. A very attractive boy that was a vampire, to boot. I suddenly felt very vulnerable, and I rubbed my arms as I glanced around. Nothing seemed out of place, yet here he was; my dream suddenly took on a very different meaning.  
  
     “How long have you been here?” I looked down at my hands. “I had a dream…”  
  
     “I was curious,” he murmured. “I’ve been watching for a while now, but last night you were talking in your sleep around midnight. I thought you were crying, but you were asleep. You woke up a little when I came in through the window…”  
  
     I glanced at the window and noticed that my flimsy blanket barrier had been taken down, neatly folded and put onto my desk chair. “I see,” I said wryly. “Well, there goes any doubt I had before.”  
  
     “Doubts?” he raised an eyebrow at me.  
  
     “About… you know. I wanted to believe, but it just seemed so unreal,” I sighed. “I’ve been obsessed with that sort of thing since I was little. I guess it’s going to take getting used to.”  
  
     Edward tilted his head. “You’re still not scared?”  
  
     “You don’t scare me.”  
  
     He smiled, and I tried to ignore the goosebumps that ran along my body at the flash of brilliant, gleaming teeth; he grinned more. “In that case, since you’re obviously not disturbed by people randomly appearing in your bedroom… Would you like a ride to school?”  
  
     I opened my mouth, then shut it again. My initial reaction was to say yes, but a wave of self-consciousness made me hesitate. “Can you give me a minute?” I squeaked, running off to the bathroom when he nodded.  
  
     Going as fast as I could, I brushed my teeth twice over and tried to detangle my hair. After about ten minutes-- much longer than I’d hoped for-- I returned to my room from the bathroom with a smile, albeit a sheepish one; I still wasn’t quite done yet. I sat down on the side on my bed and began to gather stuff for school. He didn’t seem at all bothered, giving me a patient look as I gathered some clothes from the dresser next to the bed. I tried not to blush when I grabbed my under garments. I ran off again, quickly got dressed and came back for good.  
  
     “So!” I breathed, trying not to pant from rushing my morning routine. “About that ride. To school, I mean.”  
  
     He raised an eyebrow. “Yes, to school,” he smirked, and I quickly looked away from his amused gold eyes. “I suppose you could always call Mike if you’re uncomfortable…”  
  
     “That’s not it at all. I’m not uncomfortable at all, really,” I replied vehemently. “I’d love for you to take me with you. Uhm…” I glanced out the window and didn’t notice a car. “But how are we going to get there?”  
  
     Edward rose gracefully from the floor and headed to the stairs. “I’ll go get my car while you have some breakfast.”  
  
     I stood up to follow him down the stairs to protest his leaving, but by the time I got to my door, he was gone. I stared at the stairs before grabbing my school stuff and descending to the lower floor; I looked around, but sure enough, I found myself alone. The windows were shut, the door was mysteriously locked, and the streets were disturbingly empty when I looked outside. Despite the fact I had told Edward I wasn’t scared and that I wasn’t uncomfortable, I suddenly lost the desire to eat; I wasn’t as used to all this as I thought I was going to be.  
  
     The knock at the door as I was getting on my shoes and coat was unexpected, and I jumped for the second time that morning. Going to the door, I peeked through the glass on the door and saw Edward there. I glanced at the clock in the kitchen; it had only been five minutes or so since he’d left. Unless Edward lived on the same street, it would have been impossible for him to have gotten home and back in five minutes, and there was no way Edward lived on my street without my having heard about it from Jessica or Angela. Unless…  
  
     “Welcome back, Flash,” I muttered, opening up the door and trudging out into the rain while trying not to trip on the slick steps.  
  
     Edward slipped his arm around mine, helping me to the car; I tried to keep breathing. “Being… like me… has its perks. One is that you’re never late for school.”  
  
     I crawled into the passenger seat of the shiny, silver Volvo when he opened the door for me. “Punctuality. Always a good thing,” I smiled slightly, fumbling with the seatbelt in my nervousness. Being alone in a car with Edward was the closest thing I’d ever had to a dream come true. “So…”  
  
     Getting into the driver’s seat, Edward paused and looked over at me with those golden eyes. “So…”  
  
     I hesitated. “I have so many things I want to know.”  
  
     He looked at me a moment, longer, than looked at his watch. “We have an hour before school,” he commented. Putting the keys into the ignition, he turned on the car’s heater and CD player, filling the car with a blast of warmth and soft, calm music. “I suppose I can answer some questions.”  
  
     “What… exactly are the other perks?” I wondered. Curiosity always won out over fear with me; I could be faced with Godzilla and want to poke at it more than I’d want to run. “I mean with… people like you, there’s a lot of stories.”  
  
     “Keep in mind that Hollywood has too much time on its hands,” Edward sighed. “But there are several things that are more or less accurate. We are very fast,” he gave me a slight smile, “and we are very strong. Although exactly how fast and strong depends on the individual. Most get stronger as they age, since they have time to get used to their power and how to harness it as well as plain old practice. And then some of us, not all, have… unique talents, as I mentioned yesterday.”  
  
     “But no turning into bats.”  
  
     He laughed. “No, we leave the shape-shifting to the Quileute… You remember how I told you that I can hear people’s thoughts?” Edward asked, hesitating. I nodded. “Well, Emmett… he is the strongest of the family. He is much stronger than normal, even by… our standards. Jasper has the ability to feel people’s emotions, and can influence them.”  
  
     “Like empathy,” I said, pleased now that I read the little book on ‘rock magic’ I had gotten; at least I had picked up some spiffy New Age terms that could prove somewhat useful.  
  
     “Yeah, I suppose so. It’s a bit different though-- Jasper doesn’t just sense emotions, he can change them, control them. Rosalie is similar, but she simply has power over her own charisma. She can be the center of attention or completely avoid the limelight, just by wanting it. Useful at times, but nothing spectacular.”  
  
     “And Alice?”  
  
     Edward’s expression became unreadable. “Alice is spectacular,” he said calmly, but I felt a thread of curiosity worm its way through my mind. Something had changed in his tone and in his eyes.  
  
     “What, can she see the future?” I joked.  
  
     His eyes met mine. “Exactly.”  
  
     It took me a moment to let that sink in, and I suddenly suspected why there’d been the shift in his attitude. “Has she seen our future?” I asked, trying to keep my tone playful; it didn’t work.  
  
     “Alice doesn’t tend to share unless asked,” he replied shortly. “And I tend to not ask. Sometimes, there are things best left alone.”  
  
     “Like you?”  
  
     “Like me.”  
  
     I thought over his words for a short moment, then shook my head. “It’s too late for that.”  
  
     Edward’s hand suddenly gripped my wrist as he turned me in my seat to face him. “Is it? Is it really too late to walk away, to ignore me and all of this?”  
  
     “Do you want me to?” I asked, trying to dismiss the cold pain seeping up my arm and into my shoulder. He didn’t answer me, which was answer enough. “Exactly. And besides, even if it wasn’t too late to walk away, I’m part of this now. It’s not something you can control anymore.”  
  
     He muttered something under his breath, but just as I opened his mouth to clarify what he had said, Edward started the car. “We better get going.”  
  
     I closed my mouth, nodding as I looked down at my hands; they were shaking slightly. I bit back on the unease that had risen in my throat, brushing it off as overreacting as he took off down the street. I was simply freaked out a bit still from learning what Edward was… I just needed to get used to it all. Still…  
  
     _I always do_ , he had said oh so softly. What he had meant, I didn’t know. I didn’t care to ask; he was driving like a maniac towards the school and I was suddenly too busy clinging to my seat to care. I would find out, I supposed, one way or another.


	13. Chapter Twelve

     The following days were like something out of a movie.   
  
     Erin was still sick, and although I felt bad about him being unable to come to school, it gave me time with Edward. He drove me to school the next few days, picking me up early each morning just so that we could talk together before school started. I was amazed at how easy it was to talk to him; I sat there for hours and just poured out my life to him, without even feeling a flicker of shame. He laughed at my jokes, smiling at the happy parts of my life and offering comfort for the darker parts. When I told him about the accident, he held my hand and didn’t pull away when I cried over what I had lost because of it.   
  
     “Dancing was all that really mattered to me,” I’d choked out through the tears. “It was all I ever wanted to do.”  
  
     “I saw photos you took, when I was in your room,” Edward had replied as he gave my hand a gentle squeeze. “You have talent. There’s a lot left you could offer the world.”  
  
     And for his kind words, I was grateful. Edward shared little about his own life, casually redirecting the conversation when I got too interested in his past, but he explained that it wasn’t something he could tell me yet.  
  
     “I’ll tell you everything one day soon,” he’d say. “I don’t think my family would be happy if I shared too much right now.”  
  
     I didn’t push the issue; why ruin everything by being snoopy? He had shared so much already. And from the way he spoke before, it wouldn’t be wise to push him away. He hadn’t said anything more about it, but I kept wondering what else was out there waiting for hapless people, ignorant of the reality in which they lived. I remembered the thugs in Port Angeles, and more keenly, I remembered the stranger with the cold hands. One of his family? His father, the mysterious doctor? But I stayed quiet on it, waiting. We spent the rest of those days catching fleeting glimpses of each other; he sat with his family during lunch, and I sat with my friends, as we had been. During Biology, though, we sat close... so close we were almost touching. The intimacy of it was intense, and I found myself surprisingly grateful of the time apart. It gave me time to calm down and focus on other things.  
  
     Thursday evening, half an hour after Edward had dropped me off, I walked to Erin’s house. The weather was cold, but the sidewalks were clear and it wasn’t too far of a walk. Erin had come to see me while I had been sick, and I wanted to return the favor; I brought a batch of home made cookies along as a gift. At first, no one answered the door when I rang the doorbell. On the second try, a familiar face peeked out.   
  
     “Hey Ben,” I greeted the tall jock with a grin. “I’m Bella Swanson, from down the street. Is Erin home?”  
  
     He blinked and tried to smile, but it looked pained rather than pleasant. “Hey Bella. Erin’s told me a lot about you. But uhm, I don’t think it’s a good time. Right now, I mean. He’s sleeping. It’s been a rough three days.”  
  
     I frowned. “Poor guy. What’s going on?”  
  
     Ben looked over his shoulder, then stepped outside and closed the door behind him. “No one really knows. He’d been having a fever and screaming in pain for over two days. I took him to the doctor when everyone else was off at school and work, and the doctors said maybe he had some sort of infection. He said he had this sort of nasty looking scratch on his arm from when he went out hiking the other night. There was one point this morning I thought that he... well, I thought he stopped breathing. But then he started getting a lot better overnight. I must be tired, huh?”  
  
     “It’s a lot to go through,” I agreed. I paused, feeling like there was something I should say. Nothing came to my mind; I shoved the feeling back down.  “Thank you for taking care of him through all this, Ben. Do you need anything right now?”  
  
     “I don’t think so, but thank you for offering.” He smiled, and this time it held some mirth. “I better go back now. I’ll have Erin calls you as soon as he starts getting better.”  
  
     Handing Ben the bag of cookies, I smiled back. “Here’s a little something, for Erin. And for you, too. Hang in there.”  
  
     Murmuring his thanks, Ben accepted the gift and disappeared back inside. I stood there for a time before turning and walking back towards home. I wanted to help Erin, but Ben was already there, and what could I do? It sounded horrible, what my friend was going through. At the end of the walk-way, I felt the hair on the back of my neck rise; I looked over my shoulder, my eyebrows furrowing as I saw a gap in the blinds snap shut the moment I had glanced in that direction. I continued walking, a bit faster than before.  
  
* * * * *   
  
     “I want to meet your family.”  
  
     Edward didn’t reply, driving towards the school at his usual insane speeds. “Did you finish last night’s Biology homework?”  
  
     “I’m serious,” I said with a scowl. “I’ve already seen your father. What’s the big deal?”  
  
     “Why are you so eager? Are you so curious about vampires that you’re willing to come into a house with seven of them?”  
  
     “Because I have more questions. I thought maybe if you let me meet your family, it’d be okay to talk about things. I know it’s complicated, but you’re my friend, at least. You guys don’t drink human blood, so it should be okay, right?”  
  
     He made a noise as he pulled into the school parking lot. He found a space and turned off the car, leaning back in the seat as he stared at the roof of the car. “You’re young and you’re mortal. I don’t expect you to understand how things work, but...”  
  
     The words stung. “I just--”  
  
     “Let me talk to them a bit more. I would love for you to meet them, but not yet. Alice is really the only one who is supportive of us hanging out with one another. I need to give the others time to come around. Just wait a little bit longer.”  
  
     I opened my mouth, then shut it again. “Alright. I understand.”  
  
     He smiled; I melted. “That’s my girl.”  
  
     We listened to classical music on the radio as the minutes ticked by, and when the bell rang for school to start, Edward gave me a gentle hug and we went our separate ways. The day dragged by; Erin wasn’t in class again, and Mike seemed more distant than usual. Lunch was quiet. Jessica and Angela looked withdrawn. Lauren walked by, and stopped next to my chair.  
  
     “Tell Erin to feel better soon,” she said to us all. “If any of you see him. I’m sorry he’s sick.”  
  
     The compassion in her voice was a surprise to me, but I nodded. “He lives by me. I’ll be sure to pass along the well-wishes. Thank you.”  
  
     “I never thought I’d miss the dork,” Mike muttered as Lauren left to go sit with Tyler. “Sitting here, babbling about Transformers...”  
  
     Angela worried her bottom lip, glancing at me. “Bella, have you heard from Erin at all? He hasn’t even called any of us in days.”  
  
     “I saw him yesterday,” I lied. “He really isn’t up for talking to anyone. I heard he should be better here soon. Turns out it was just the flu or something. He’s really tired and said he’ll call us all when he’s feeling more rested.”  
  
     Jessica turned the conversation towards prom, and I zoned out. I didn’t want to let my friends know about Ben, and for some reason, I didn’t want to tell them the truth about what was going on with Erin. It was bizarre, and it would probably just make them worry more. They all looked more upbeat, and they wouldn’t bother him for a couple more days. That was good, right? Yet I felt guilty, because it was Erin’s choice if he was ready to talk to people, not mine. And there was a more complicated reason, a bit more selfish... I wanted to talk to him first. I wanted to know why he’d been out hiking, an activity that was not something he was apt to participate in on his own. Maybe he went with Ben, but Ben didn’t seem to know much about it.   
  
     My eyes traveled over to the Cullen table. Edward had his back to me, but I could see the faces of the other four. They all had solemn expressions; Jasper was especially tight-lipped, his face twisted in what seemed to be a grimace. Alice seemed neutral. I found myself looking at her, noticing the shape of her face, her eyes and the way her dark hair fell into a bouncy pixie cut. She looked a bit like me, only a paler version. Her nose was shaped better but equally pronounced, and her eyes were more round than almond-shaped... like mine. Those eyes were suddenly turned towards me, and I felt my breath hitch. For some reason, I couldn’t look away from her unblinking, golden gaze. I felt like I was an open book, and she was reading through the pages. The bell ending lunch rang just then, and seemed to snap the link between us. I caught a flicker of sadness in her eyes, but then she turned away, and the moment was over.  
  
     Ignoring the way my body trembled, I followed Angela to Biology class. Edward came in soon after, but we didn’t speak. He seemed distracted, and I didn’t ask why. I knew better than to try; he would talk when he was ready. I focused on the class, and when it ended, Edward had left without saying anything to me. Mike noticed my morose attitude on the way to gym, and gave me a playful punch on the shoulder.  
  
     “Want me to beat him up for you?” he asked. He sounded like he was only half-joking. “Is everything okay?”  
  
     “No, it’s fine. He’s just sort of quiet. But everything is okay, thank you. How are you and Jessica doing?”  
  
     Mike hesitated, then smiled and started talking about how great things were going. I only heard half of what he said, and my time in gym class was spent thinking about Edward in between bouts of studying for a Spanish test. How long had Edward lived? How much did he know? Did he take classes because he actually wanted to learn, or had he already learned all there was to learn? But if he had learned everything, then what would be the point of pretending to be a High School student? Maybe it was just interesting to see how the world changed with the times. I glanced up and looked over the gym class; it all seemed so irrelevant in the face of an eternity, able to do whatever one would want. When I tried to imagine what I would do if I had forever, immortal and powerful, I couldn’t even begin to list all the things I would rather be doing. I’d have forever to learn Spanish! Hell, I could learn every language on the planet.  
  
     But there would be a catch, I knew. Drinking blood, for one; the thought of it made me want to heave. And what else? Insanity? Could vampires go insane, after living for hundreds or thousands of years?  
  
     “Penny for your thoughts?”  
  
     I jumped at Edward’s voice. Looking up, I realized that he and I were the only ones left in the gym. “Oh, I... Is school over?”  
  
     Edward grinned. “It’s been over for a few minutes now. I was waiting for you outside, but Mike said you were still in here. Something about Spanish homework. Are you okay?”  
  
     “Just confused about things still, if you know what I mean,” I replied as I stood up and gathered my things. “It’s a lot to take in. I was thinking about it all, and I guess I got distracted.”  
  
     “Well, we’ve got quite a long time to be able to talk about it. I’m not going anywhere.”  
  
     I smiled as we walked outside, but as Edward walked to his car, I stopped. “That’s Erin’s car,” I said out loud, wondering. Curious, I began to walk towards the car. “He wasn’t at school today. Why would his car be here?”  
  
     Edward grabbed my wrist, yanking me back to him so fast and hard that it hurt.  
  
     “Hey,” I yelped. “What are you doing?”  
  
     “He’s probably getting his work from this week,” Edward said in a slow, perfectly calm voice. His tone was low, almost hypnotic. “It makes sense. We should leave him alone. Besides, there’s something I need to talk to you about. Okay?”  
  
     I tried to speak, an objection rising in my throat, but then it seemed like the most reasonable thing in the world; of course, Erin was a studious fellow, he was just getting his back homework. I followed Edward to the car, my head suddenly hurting. Edward opened my car door, and I gave Erin’s car one last glance before climbing into the Volvo. I wanted to speak, but my mouth was dry and my tongue felt thick. It was like I was trying to see through cotton, and when I looked to Edward, he seemed hazy. He smiled at me from the car seat, that dazzling smile of his. I leaned back in the seat, closing my eyes and waiting for the feeling to pass. Edward began to drive, and it wasn’t until a few minutes later that I realized we weren’t heading towards my house. For a moment, panic rose in my chest. The panic died as soon as it came, and I found myself feeling utterly at peace.  
  
     “Not every vampire is like me, Bella,” Edward said softly. “I could take care of you. I could protect you. You draw me in, Bella. But there are others out there, ones that would hurt you. Ones that want to feed on that delicious blood of yours. I can’t let that happen. Do you understand? I want to keep you safe. I want you to stay with me, and I’ll do whatever it takes to keep them from hurting you.”  
  
     “I love you, Edward,” I mumbled. “Where are we going?”  
  
     He said nothing for a time. “Just giving us a moment to talk. You shouldn’t even be here. This is a mistake,” he sighed. The sudden change in tone confused me. “Alice told me... My family wants to meet you. But they think you should know the truth. I don’t know if that’s something you’re ready for, not yet.”  
  
     “I want to know everything.”  
  
     “I can’t lose you. I can’t do it again.”  
  
     I wanted to say something, to assure him that I wouldn’t be scared away. Just then, we pulled up in front of my house; he had taken a longer route. I fumbled with the door handle, making my way out of the car and standing on the sidewalk as I fought for a sense of balance. “You won’t lose me,” I said as I shook my head. “I’m right here.”  
  
     “You’re right there,” he agreed. Edward looked at me with an intense stare, and I felt my knees wobble. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow. Noon. Goodbye, Bella.”  
  
     As he drove away, I forced myself up to the door of my home. I made it inside, shutting the door behind me and locking it. Making me way to the kitchen, I blinked at a note on the counter. I picked it up and squinted at the text; I had a doctor’s appointment on Monday, since school was out for an in-service day, my father’s handwriting told me. I had apparently missed a voicemail left on the answering machine, but he’d found it in time and offered to take me. I was grateful, especially since my vision was still swimming. Using the counter as a crutch, I made my way to the kitchen sink, using one hand to balance myself and using the other to splash cold water on my face. As I straightened, I noticed a movement in the window over the sink; I gasped as it formed a blurry image, but before I could turn, there was a hand over my mouth.  
  
     “Don’t scream,” a voice whispered in my ear. The breath that ghosted across my neck was sweet, like a flower. “Please.”  
  
     My eyes were transfixed on the image in the window. His black hair was silky and tussled, his skin the color of the palest ivory, and his eyes were like pools of ink in his skull; he was beautiful, strong and so cold that I could have sworn my breath steamed as it left my nose and ghosted over his hand. But that voice... I nodded, and slowly he lowered his hand. I turned and faced him, and my heart felt like it was being crushed in my chest. “Oh Erin...”  
  
     Erin, so unlike the Erin I had known, paced back and forth like a caged animal. “You’re the only one I can turn to, Bella. I don’t understand what’s happened to me. I was just coming over to your house, and I saw something in the woods. I followed, and... Now this.” He stopped, focusing his vampire eyes on me. “Sit down, before you faint. You’re not well.”  
  
     I groped for a the chair in the corner, sinking into it. “And neither are you. You’re a vampire.”  
  
     He ran a hand through his hair. “I thought maybe you knew. After what I saw the day Tyler’s van... And then today, when Cullen left here. I knew he was a vampire. I can sense all these things, Bella. I look at people and I can just know things. Like... like ESP or something. I don’t understand what’s going on. I need help.”  
  
     “What happened?”  
  
     “I don’t know. Like I said, I went into the woods. I’d been doing some research before I wanted to come over, and I had something I wanted to show you. But then I... I was in the woods all of a sudden, and there was just this feeling like something ripping me apart. And before I knew it, there was this noise and I woke up in front of my house. There was so much pain, but I looked fine. My mom found me and took me to a doctor. Ben came over, and took care of me when my mom took my sister away, to my aunt’s. And Ben just...”  
  
     “Ben...” I stopped, staring at him. “Erin, what about Ben?”  
  
     Erin glanced at me from the corner of his eye and kept pacing. “Ben is fine. I woke up like this. He had been watching me the entire time. And he... he just sat there and stared at me, Bella. he didn’t run away, but he’s scared of me. He stayed in the bathroom with the door locked. Like I was something out of a nightmare. And I am, aren’t I? I’m a damn vampire. How does this even exist?”  
  
     Rubbing my face, I took a breath and tried to focus. “I know it’s hard to believe. I can’t imagine what you must feel like right now, but we can get you through this. Ben didn’t run away. That’s a good thing right?”  
  
     “I almost ripped the door down. I almost went in there and ripped his throat out.” Erin wrung his hands. “I’m hungry. So, so hungry. And what am I supposed to do about it? Kill someone? I can’t do that.”  
  
     I looked at the phone. Standing up, I moved towards it. “I can called Edward, he’ll--”  
  
     “NO!”  
  
     I jerked back as Erin’s hand came down on the phone... and went right through it. Staring at the smashed phone, I blinked at Erin, who stared back at me with wide, worried eyes. “Erin, what the hell?”  
  
     “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I just meant to... I didn’t know I could do that.”  
  
     “I don’t care about the phone, I mean about Edward!”  
  
     Erin fidgeted; his eyes went to the window before settling on the floor. “I think it was Edward that did this to me.”  
  
     My stomach felt like it had twisted into a knot. “You think Edward did this? Why would he?”  
  
     “I...” he glanced out the window again. “Look, I can’t tell you. But I can show you. Come up to your room with me. I don’t have a lot of time left to stay here.”  
  
     I didn’t ask what he meant by that. Trusting in my friend, I followed him upstairs, fighting against the slowly fading nausea. He was at my computer by the time I got there, turning it on and sticking a CD into the drive. Erin motioned to my chair, and I sat as he fiddled with the computer; a bright white screen popped up, with almost twenty different files splayed across it. He opened one, and my eyes fell on the scanned newspaper article. Vanished, the title declared in bolded caps. My gaze was drawn to the picture, a small color photo of an older man named Jeff York; he had pale skin and dark, wavy hair, looking so much like Erin that my jaw dropped. I looked up at Erin, searching his grim expression for some sort of explanation.  
  
     “Bella, that man was my uncle. He was a private investigator. Amelia Lancaster’s family employed him to look into the death of their daughter. He’d been looking into the Cullens for a little while, and been asking questions at the place where Edward’s dad used to work. He’d gone up to Alaska, and the week he was supposed to come back, he disappeared. They found his car by a river, and because my aunt and him had been having some fights over money, they said he killed himself. I never believed it. I think... I think he found out the Cullens were vampires, and they killed him because of it.”  
  
     Swallowing, I turned back to the article. “Erin... Edward said there were others. Maybe it wasn’t them. Even if it was, why would they turn you into a vampire? It wouldn’t stop you from researching this.”  
  
     “Maybe they thought I was dead.”  
  
     “It’s not possible.” Turning off my monitor, I stood up and moved to my window. I shoved the lock closed and snapped the blinds down. I leaned against the wall and watched him; the unease in the back of my mind, combined with the final threads of vertigo, birthed a small seed of doubt in my thoughts. “Why were you at the school today, Erin? If you thought Edward did this, why stay here?”  
  
     Erin frowned. “I wasn’t at school today. I was in bed half the day, and in the woods chasing squirrels around like a damn dog for the rest of it.”  
  
     “Your car was there.”  
  
     He sat down on the edge of my bed, staring past me at the window. “It’s all happening again,” he whispered. “They thought they killed me, and they were going to make it look like I’d...”  
  
     “It can’t be Edward,” I said with clenched teeth. “He’s been telling me things. He saved my life. It had to be someone else, and the Cullens are getting the blame for it.”  
  
     “Bella...” Erin trailed off, then stood and moved towards my bedroom door. “I have to go.”  
  
     “Why? Edward said that vampires can live off animal blood. You can stay.”   
  
     “No, I can’t stay here right now. I need to try and say goodbye to Ben, and I need to get away from Forks for a while. If what Edward said is true, I’ll come back after I get this under control. I died, Bella. I might have new life, but the life I had is gone. I’m not supposed to exist. It’s... If I’m going to live among people, I can’t be here until I’m sure it’s safe. For all of us.”  
  
     There was nothing I could say to argue it. I felt tears sting my eyes; I wanted to hug him, but when I stepped forward, he stepped backwards. The smile on his lips was sad, and in that moment it sunk in that the Erin I knew was dead and gone. The world that had opened my eyes to a new and startling reality had brought an end to Erin’s life; his life as a vampire, something I couldn’t even imagine, couldn’t have me or any of our friend in it. It couldn’t have his family in it. His family would lose another member to the darkness, and what closure would they ever have? What closure could they have? If Erin was right and someone had tried to kill him to keep him quiet, there was no assurance that he’d ever come back... even if he got his hunger under control. If he did come back, I knew humanity all too well; there was no way he’d be able to live, cold and ageless, among those he had known when he had been one of them.  
  
     Because talking hurt too much, I simply nodded.   
  
     Erin turned to go, but glanced over his shoulder at me. “And Bella? It’s bad enough I came here. If they know I’ve talked to you, they might hurt you, too. You’re already in too deep, you know. Just think about what I’ve said, and promise me. Promise me you’ll be careful.”  
  
     And then he was gone. I saw nothing, heard nothing. Minutes later, while I still sat on my bed in shock, the front door opened. Charlie came up the stairs, his eyes tired and red. For a long time, he stood there in the doorway, looking at the floor... the ceiling... anything but me. He had his hat in his hands, and he kept tracing the brim. I remember him looking that way when, over the years, he’d watched me leave on a plane back to Arizona.   
  
     “Bella.” He finally spoke, his voice ragged as he used my nickname for the first time ever. “I’m sorry, hun. Erin... We found his car by the Subway. There was an empty bottle of sleeping pills in it. We think he’d been on drugs for a while, after he got depressed over his late uncle. It looks like he jumped into the river. We can’t find him.”  
  
     The tears I hadn’t cried in front of Erin, I cried then. Charlie came in, sitting down on my bed and bringing me into a tight hug. I sobbed into his shoulder, mourning for my friend and for the deception someone had spun to explain his disappearance. After I had rubbed my eyes raw, Charlie led me downstairs and put on the movie Babe... my favorite movie as a kid. He ordered pizza and sat with me all night, saying little but offering hugs and words of love when the tears started again.   
  
     Near the end of the night, Charlie sat down with me and held my hand. “I know things are difficult right now,” he said, “but they will get better. I promise you. It might not get easier tomorrow, and sometimes they don’t get easier for years. But one day, you will wake up and you will realize that where you are then is better than where you were today. And until that day, I will be here for you.”  
  
     For the first time in a long time, I think I finally felt what it’s like to be truly loved.


	14. Chapter Thirteen

     I fell asleep on the sofa, and when I woke up, I realized that my father had slept in the recliner chair all night. A blanket was sprawled over the chair, and as I got up, I could smell and hear bacon cooking. Lured by the delicious aroma, I stumbled about and found my way to the bathroom. I changed into something a bit less grimy and followed the smell of charred meat and browning sugar.  
  
     “Hey, pumpkin,” Charlie said with a small smile as I wandered into the kitchen. “How are you?”  
  
     “Tired.” I looked at the clock as I pulled out a chair from the table and sat down. I was thankful that I wasn’t going to the homecoming dance. “You’re late for work. What’s going on?”  
  
     Charlie scooped a round of butter onto a stack of pancakes; he handed it to me and followed it with a plate with two slices of bacon. “I took today off, and I’ll go in on Sunday instead. I wanted to make sure you’re okay. Billy and Jacob are coming over later to have dinner with us... if you’re up for it. You and Jacob used to be good friends.”  
  
     The thought of talking to Jake warmed my heart; it would be nice to see him, and I wondered if I could get him alone long enough to talk to him about the Cullens. I wanted to know what he really believed. But it was already past nine o’ clock, and I knew Edward would be coming at noon. I picked at my food for a moment, trying to word my reply carefully. “I would love to have dinner with you all. Uhm... is it okay if I go somewhere at noon though, with a friend? I really need to talk to him.”  
  
     “Him?” Charlie asked, sitting down with his breakfast and giving me the cop stare. “Who is he?”  
  
     “Edward Cullen.” I tried to make my voice casual, but it came out as a meep. “We’ve been hanging out at school for a couple weeks, and he wanted to take me to Seattle. But I think I’d like to stay closer to town right now, with everything going on. Maybe go down to the coffee shop?”  
  
     Charlie chewed a bite of pancake. The intensity in his expression softened, and he nodded. “Just stay closer to town. Seattle is a long way to go for kids your age, and I’m worried about you.” He toyed with a bit of bacon. “Are you two dating?”  
  
     “I don’t know.” It was an honest reply. “Would it be bad if we were?”  
  
     “You’re a smart girl, Isabella. If you really want to date him, I won’t say no. You’re older now, but just stay in school and stay safe. I would really hate for you to...” Charlie stopped. He glanced at me, and I knew what he wanted to say; he wouldn’t say it, because he still cared about my mother too much. “Be unhappy. I want you to have a good life.”  
  
     We fell into our comfortable silence; I think we had both used up our emotional spoons for the next year and a half. When breakfast was finished, I cleaned up the dishes and put them in the dishwasher. It was nearly ten o’ clock, and it would take me time to get ready to go. It hurt to move, and my leg cramped on the way up the stairs. I was thankful that Charlie had decided to take a shower. I already felt stuffed up and headachy from crying, and I knew Charlie hated seeing me miserable. Sitting on the stairs, I wondered where Erin was and if he was okay. It almost felt like a dream when I had woken up, but as I got to my room and checked the computer tower, I saw the CD that he’d given me. It had been real. It sank in more when I heard Charlie’s shower ended, and minutes later I heard a cry of dismay from downstairs.  
  
     “What happened to the phone?”  
  
     “I... tripped over it before you got home last night.” I yelled down the stairs as I grabbed a towel, inventing further explanation. “And I stepped on it. I’m sorry. I can buy you a new one?”  
  
     “It’s alright, I have a spare in the garage...”  
  
     After I took my own shower and got dressed, slipping on a soft blue sweater and black pants, I went back to my room and turned on the computer screen. I looked over the files, reading over the one I had left up and two others. Some were files that Erin had found in his uncle’s desk, signed by his uncle with thick black ink, and some were newspaper clippings about other incidents that seemed unrelated to his uncle’s disappearance. I read until I got creeped out by a report of a man being decapitated, a feeling of being watched crawling up my spine. Grabbing the disk and turning off the computer totally, I hid the CD inside the locking drawer on my desk. I piled papers and half-full bottles of lotion on top of it, trying to hide it... from who, I didn’t know. What I did know was that the lock would probably be useless against a vampire, and there was no doubt that a vampire was behind Erin’s misfortune.  
  
     When I came down the stairs, Charlie eyed me from the living room; I could tell he was noticing how pale I was and that I was limping, but he tried to keep his tone gentle. “Did you get the message I left last night?”  
  
     “Yes. I know, I need to see the doctor,” I sighed as I sank onto the sofa. The leather-banded watch on my wrist, a gift from Charlie years ago, told me it was a half hour until noon. “It’s probably the stress. With a new school, and now...”   
  
     “Have you talked to Nora lately?”  
  
     I winced. “No.”  
  
     Charlie examined the ceiling. “I called your mother this morning. She says you haven’t e-mailed her like you promised. I told her you’ve been dealing with a lot. Maybe when you get back, you can check in with her. She was... upset.” He looked at me, and I could see pain in his eyes. “She’s been drinking again, hasn’t she?”  
  
     My reply was cut off by the sound of a knock at the door. I accepted the escape, standing and forcing myself to walk as steady as possible; I opened the door and felt my heart pound at the sight of Edward, dressed in dark jeans and an elegant black shirt. After a moment, I waved him inside and tried to breathe.  
  
     “You’re early!” I managed to say. As the word left my mouth, I knew they sounded stupid. I couldn’t stop myself, though, and my lips blabbered on. “You look amazing. Black is really your color.”  
  
     “Thanks!” He said, flashing me his lop-sided grin, and my insides turned to warm goop. “I wanted to meet your dad. I thought it’d only be right to introduce myself.”  
  
     Charlie was already on his way over. “Edward, it’s nice to officially meet you. I’ve spoken with your father on a few occasions. Brilliant man.”  
  
     “Thank you, sir. He thinks highly of you as well. There was an accident just outside of town last year in the spring, and you had to splint a girl’s leg. My father says it was the best splint he’d seen outside a doctor’s office.”  
  
     “I remember that,” Charlie laughed. “Send Doctor Cullen my regards when you see him. So, I heard you two were thinking of a trip to Seattle today?”  
  
     Edward turned somber in an instant. “Actually, I thought we’d stick closer to town. I know Bella hasn’t been feeling that great, and after yesterday, well.” He put his hand on my shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. “I think a nice, quiet lunch... my treat... would be best.”  
  
     “I hope you two have fun.” Charlie extended a hand. “Take care of my daughter.”  
  
     Taking my father’s hand, Edward smiled. “I will.”  
  
     For the barest hint of a moment, I could see my father’s eyes narrow into a sharp, hard expression; I blinked, and it was gone. He returned Edward’s smile and waved at us, watching as Edward and I headed towards the Volvo. As we pulled away and Edward drove a perfectly normal speed down the road, only then did my father go back inside the house. Edward continued to drive like a reasonable person until we reached the city limits; the needle on the speedometer steadily crept upwards until the car was cruising along at a cool sixty-five miles per hour along the forested roads heading north.  
  
     “I take it you’re not used to driving this fast,” he said as he noticed my fingers gripping my seat. Edward slowed the car to sixty. “I’m used to going faster than this on foot. And I forget that not everyone is as durable as I am. My family is used to sticking to our own kind. You’re sort of the first person to get close to us since... a while.”  
  
     “Since Alaska?”  
  
     Edward gave me a quick glance. “I guess so. When did you hear about that?”  
  
     I measured my reply; I didn’t want to imply anyone I knew. “A few people at school were jealous that you were dating me. I suppose they were just being gossips. They said a friend of yours died from an animal attack when you were hunting up there.”  
  
     “Yeah.” He fell silent. The car went down to fifty-five. “Amelia. She was human, and she decided she liked me. I’d been alone for so long, I thought... She found out what we were, but she was okay with it. We took her with us on one of our trips. Emmett liked to go hunt bear, he says they taste good. Strong. I liked to hunt mountain lions. They’re harder to catch and they put up a damn good fight. But what I was hunting turned out to be what killed Amelia. I never found the cat that did it.”  
  
     “I’m sorry. It must have been very sad.”  
  
     Edward tightened his hands on the wheel. “We’ve stuck to hunting deer since then. Easier and less dangerous for all of us. One animal can last us quite a while, so it’s not like we went often. But Alice likes to sell the animal parts after we’re done, and it’s easier to do with deer. But that’s all we changed. We move every ten years or so, and we don’t let anyone get close. Until you. Until all of this.”  
  
     I looked out the window and watched the trees go by. “I wish I could know what you’re talking about. I feel like I’m in the middle of some story, and I have no idea what’s going on around me.”  
  
     “That’s why we’re going out here.”  
  
     The car turned onto a road, overgrown with blackberry vines and low-hanging branches. I said nothing as he kept driving, and he offered no explanation for where ‘here’ was; it wasn’t until fifteen minutes later that he parked the car at the edge of a wooded hill, and motioned for me to get out as he turned off the car. I opened the door and stepped out into the wilderness, looking about and seeing nothing but trees and brush every way I turned. Edward was heading up the hill, and I slowly trudged up after him. My leg ached, but I kept up and felt a glow of pride when we got to the top. The view was of a lush green valley, with tall, full pine trees jutting up into the cloudy skies like stalagmites in a cave. The trees that weren’t evergreen were already losing their leaves or turning brilliant golds and reds. I took in the scene before me; this was something I had never gotten to see in Arizona.  
  
     Edward put an arm around my waist. “Do you like it?”  
  
     “It’s beautiful. Where are we?”  
  
     “Oh, just a place I like to visit when I’m feeling lost. It helps me to run around here and think, burn off some steam. I wanted to show it to you. Not just because it’s beautiful... but because it’s part of who I am.” He dropped his arm and motioned to one of the bigger trees far in the distance. “See that tree over there?”  
  
     “Yep!”  
  
     And then Edward was gone. Within seconds, I saw the tree tremble, shake and then fall with a large crash. As I stood there gaping, Edward reappeared next to me like magic. “Like I said, vampires are fast and strong. We can snap trees like their twigs.” Walking over to another tree, this one much closer and smaller, he ripped it out of the ground... roots and all... and looked at me while he threw it yards away. “Can you imagine what we can do to a person? It’s like stepping on an ant.”  
  
     I stared at the tree; a lone, crimson leaf fell silently to the ground, never to be remembered as anything special or beautiful. Why would it be? Just one leaf among many, many leaves. “I can imagine.”  
  
     Edward held out his hand. “Come with me. There’s more you need to see. After that, if you still want me to, I’ll explain everything.”  
  
     Everything. My mind reeled at the thought, even as Erin’s face flashed through my mind like a warning. If he would explain everything, then I would go. I grabbed his hand, and cried out... first in fear, then in wonder... as Edward flung me onto his back and ran. It was bumpy, but no more so than a horse, and the trees were going by so fast that they blurred together in a canvas of brown and green splotches. I began to get dizzy from it all, and my grip around Edward’s neck tightened. He kept going, jumping over fallen trees and leaping across streams so fast that I could have sworn we were flying. But just as suddenly as it had begun, Edward stopped; the suddenness of it made me queasy, but I stayed quiet as he held a finger to his pale lips.   
  
     “Vampires,” he said in a voice so low that I could barely hear, “evolved to be the perfect predator. We’re designed to be deadly.” Edward exhaled, and I blinked in surprise at the sweet, almost floral aroma of his breath. “Vampires can lure prey two ways... either by scent, or by sight. Sometimes, ignorant humans smell what they think is a wonderful flower. Sometimes, they see a handsome stranger on the corner. Either way, the too curious end up as a feast. We can hold animals with our sight, but it usually only lasts a few seconds. It’s all we really need. See there?”  
  
    I looked where he gestured, and I saw a deer stepping through the forest. At first, I was in awe of it’s beauty... and then fear flooded through me as Edward began moving forward, and I realized what I was witnessing. Edward was creeping closer and closer, and the deer didn’t even seem to notice he was there. But then the deer... a doe... looked up, and froze in place. In my mind, I urged the deer to run even though I knew it would be hopeless. I wanted to look away, shout, tell Edward to stop. I couldn’t. My voice refused to work as I watched Edward circle the animal; he was playing with it, directing it right into the center of the small clearing. Right in my line of vision. I heard a snap just then, and a scream that faded into nothing. Edward was on the ground, crouched over the deer with his mouth to it’s throat.   
  
     Sadness came over me, and I felt tears moving down my cheeks. I saw Erin in the place of the deer. Erin, with his throat covered in blood. Erin, screaming out in pain. Erin, his life draining away from his body. And when Edward looked up, blood smeared across his face and his topaz eyes alight with a predatory wildness, I saw Erin’s killer. I couldn’t move as he stood and walked to me; he moved like a feline, his lips peeled back in a fanged sneer, and I was afraid. But the closer he got, the more I grappled the terror and shoved it down. Fear wouldn’t help me. Fear would get me hurt. Forcing myself to me feet, I embraced the pump of adrenaline rushing through my body, letting it make me stupid and brave rather than letting it force me to flee. If I ran, I would be dead.   
  
     Edward was on me, pinning me up against a tree and staring into my eyes. “You see what I am? What I do? How do you like me now, hm? Do you like the monster?”  
  
     I looked through the blood, through the sickly sweet breath of the vampire and past the almost crazed look in Edward’s eyes; I saw the man who had kept me from getting crushed, the man who had let me into a world I never could have imagined, the man who thought I was beautiful too. Leaning forward, I squeezed my eyes shut and kissed him. For a second, he pushed back into the kiss; the taste of blood made me want to vomit. But then he let out an inhuman roar, pushing me away and pacing back and forth in the clearing. I sank to the ground, my body shaking and my mind racing.  
  
     “Don’t ever do that again.” Edward stopped in front of me, pointing at me with a bloodied hand. “Don’t you understand? It doesn’t matter how many animals I bring down. I want human blood. Your blood. I have never met someone with blood such as yours... never. If you kiss me, I don’t know if I can stop myself. I want to rip you apart even now. I’m not some knight in shining armor, Bella. Carlisle is a good man. He saved my life when I was dying from Yellow Fever. He saved all of us, by bringing us together and helping us to be more than killers. But never, ever doubt for a moment that we aren’t killers. It’s what we are, it’s what we do. And if you want to be a part of this, then there are rules. And the first rule is never, ever kiss me.”  
  
     “Okay,” I whispered. “I’m sorry.”  
  
     He growled. “Don’t be sorry. It’s...” Edward continued to pace, but then he came back to me and sat down, his hands on my knees. “I want you. I have wanted you for so long,” he continued, his eyes glazing over. “You don’t understand what you mean to me. Nobody trust me. Nobody. Ever since I left Carlisle once, long ago. But I just wanted to be free, you know? And now I have a chance at something so much more. I don’t want to just exist, I want to live. You make me feel alive. But we can’t be together, not if you can’t handle what I am.”  
  
     Silence fell over us as we sat there in the woods. I curled upon myself, taking slow breaths and trying to will away the tremors in my hands. Edward had tried to scare me, and I hadn’t run. In fact, I had done quite the opposite. He was beautiful, and my heart ached when I was around him. There was a darkness about him that drew me in, but even as I felt my heart fall for him... my mind refused to budge. There was too much wrong; worst yet, he’d implied that he had known Erin was gone, yet he’d barely even seemed bothered once we were away from my father. I wanted to trust him, and I wanted to believe that even monsters could be transformed into princes. It’s what Disney told children... and I knew it was a lie. A pretty lie, but a lie all the same. Hearing my father talk about his cases over the years woke me up to that, before the myth of Cinderella and such tales could sink their tendrils into my young mind. And so I sat there, shaking, knowing that I couldn’t trust Edward. I could admire him, I could be grateful for him, but I could never, ever trust him. Could I love someone that I couldn’t trust? Did I want to even try?  
  
     “I can never tell what you’re thinking,” Edward muttered. “Total silence.”  
  
     ... The mystery was still there, and I knew I had passed a crucial test. I could get closer. I could know more. And for that, for Erin and everyone else who had fallen prey to shadows in the night, I could try.  
  
     “I can handle it,” I answered. My voice was strong, and I found myself able to look Edward in the eye. “I’m not scared of what you are. I want to be with you, and I want to learn.”  
  
     Edward watched me, then grinned at me and stood up. “Come on.”  
  
     I scrambled to my feet and followed. “Where are we going?”  
  
     “I’m taking you home.” He walked down the hill, and we got into the car. Edward was still grinning, blood on his teeth, as we drove towards Forks. “I get to tell my family that it’s time to meet you.”  
  
* * * * *  
  
     When I walked in the door, the smell of burning fish assaulted my nose.   
  
     “I leave for five minutes,” I said jokingly as I entered the kitchen as saw Charlie standing over the stove. He was desperately trying to pry a hunk of salmon from a frying pan, and failing. Any other time, I might have been exasperated; at this point, it was something to take my mind off of vampires and murder. “Here, let me see that.”  
  
     “Billy said he was bringing some fish by, and I wanted to try this recipe his mother use to use all the time when we were kids. It’s a good thing I tried it before Billy got here,” Charlie said with a sheepish look. “I’d be embarrassed to serve him this.”  
  
     “You couldn’t serve it to him.” I turned the pan upside down over the sink; the fish held fast. “Unless you served him the pan, too. Can I see the recipe?”  
  
     Charlie handed it over, and peered at me as I looked it over. “I’m glad you came back when you did. I thought you’d be out a lot long than a couple of hours.”  
  
     I pretended the not-so-subtle hint had been subtle. “Oh, we just went for a walk. You know, talked about thing. Music, movies. Dad, you had this on the stove. It needed to go in the oven.”  
  
     Distracted away from any talk of Edward, my father listened intently as I explained the necessity of following directions when one hasn’t ever even cooked Top Ramen correctly. Charlie had an extra filet in the fridge, and I walked him through the steps one by one. Soon enough, he pulled the filet from the over and beamed at the perfectly cooked, perfectly seasoned salmon. I gave him a hug and helped him eat the fish, before heading to the living room to watch baseball with him while I worked on an extra credit Government assignment.  
  
      I found myself getting into the game as Charlie whooped and booed over various plays. While I didn’t know the rules and I was too busy to ask, I enjoyed the look of happiness on Charlie’s face when I started to cheer along with him when his favorite team did a good job. It wasn’t something I had really thought about before, but as I looked back, it occurred to me how lonely my father had been over the years. Sure, it was a bit annoying when he failed at cooking and needed my help, and it was a bit annoying when he tried to get me into sports. But who else did he really have? Billy had been his friend since they were children, but he hadn’t visited in a while, and I knew their relationship could be strained at times due to their differing beliefs. My mother only called when she was completely drunk, and while I knew that many people in the town liked Charlie, I hadn’t seen or heard of him going out with friends. I didn’t even know if he had in-town friends. A stab of guilt went through me, and I vowed to ask Charlie all about baseball when the next game was on. Even if I would never really love the game like he did, I wanted to have something that we could do together as a family.   
  
     Charlie’s team lost, but he didn’t seem too upset. My government assignment was finished, so I flopped on the floor next to his recliner as he channeled surfed. A cheesy Sci Fi b-movie came on, and Charlie and I stared at the screen as a CGI octopus and shark began to fight.   
  
     “This is horrible,” Charlie said with an incredulous tone. He didn’t change the channel. “This is truly horrible.”  
  
     “It is,” I agreed. I didn’t ask him to change the channel. “It really is.”  
  
     For some reason that I have never been able to explain, we sat through the whole movie, complaining the entire time. At various points, the complaints mixed with laughter; at other times, even Charlie got grossed out, making sounds I’ve only heard from 3rd grade girls. The movie ended, and as the clock rolled to five o’ clock, the next movie started. Thankfully, there was a knock at the door, and Charlie turned off the television just as a shark-octopus hybrid danced across the screen. I stood up and made my way to the front hall, laughing as Charlie opened the door and Jake swooped in, picking me up and squeezing the air out of me.  
  
     “Hello to you, too, Jacob,” Charlie said with a shake of his head.   
  
     Jake set me down and grinned. “It’s good to see you again so soon, Bells. It’s been forever since I’ve been here. Did you miss me?”  
  
     “Of course.” I playfully bapped him on the shoulder. “Was the trip okay?”  
  
     “I have my own car,” Jake crowed. He puffed his chest up, but then deflated into the perfect picture of humbleness. “Dad can’t drive any more, so I have to do it. I don’t mind. I just wish...”  
  
     “Billy!” Charlie boomed out a hearty greeting as Billy came in the door, using the wheelchair ramp that Charlie had built special just for occasions like these. “It’s good to see you!”  
  
     Smiling, Billy wheeled over to Charlie and reached up to meet Charlie in a hug. “It’s good to see you, too, old friend.” Billy’s dark, time-worn skin crinkled as he looked past Charlie and saw me. “Isabella. You’ve grown into a beautiful young woman. Have you been keeping an eye on your dad for me?”  
  
     I went over and gave Billy a hug, grinning. “When I can. You know how he is.”  
  
     “Oh, don’t I know it. Charlie, I brought some fish with me like I promised. I forgot to bring it in with me. Jacob, could you...?”  
  
     Jacob rolled his eyes at me, then scurried to the door. “Hey Charlie, come see the truck. You’ll love what I’ve done to it. It’s not that nasty green anymore.”  
  
     Billy watched as my father left; his cheer melted away into solemnity as he turned back to look at me, following me into the living room. “I heard about your friend, Isabella. I am sorry for your loss. I hope your heart finds peace soon.”  
  
     “People die,” I answered without really thinking about the words. Blushing at the coarseness of the words, I looked at my feet. “Sorry. I’m a little bitter, I guess. Thank you for your kind words.”  
  
     “Time wears on us all. It’s okay to be a little bitter, my dear. And you’re most welcome.” Shifting in his chair, Billy leaned back. I found his dark brown eyes suddenly holding my gaze, and there was a sudden blanket of warmth wrapping around me. “Death is a sad thing, Isabella. But being taken in an unnatural way... that is far worse. Yes, there are things worse than death.”  
  
     The sudden heat was almost too much. I swallowed roughly, but my mouth had gone dry; I felt like I did the day Erin had left, my mind spinning and feeling like cotton. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Billy.”  
  
     “Your father told me you are dating Edward Cullen. I know I’m in no position to tell you what to do, but you know I care about you. You’ve been like a sister to Jacob for so long. Please, leave the Cullens alone.”  
  
     “But...” I closed my eyes. It was like standing next to an open flame, and the power of it made my dizzy. I took a breath and clamped down on my mind; I didn’t know what was going on, but this was the second time this had happened, and I wasn’t going to let it get the best of me again. “I appreciate your concern, Billy. But the Cullens haven’t been on your reservation, and they have done nothing to deserve your anger. The treaty still stands.”  
  
     Billy let out a long, slow breath. “It would seem that you know more than I assumed.”  
  
     “You’d be surprised.” I grit my teeth slightly. “What I don’t know is why I keep feeling like people are prying into my skull.”  
  
     “I’m sorry that you are in such a position.” The heat was gone in a snap; the fuzzy feeling in my brain eased away. When I opened my eyes, Billy was studying his hands with a guarded expression. “I don’t want you to get hurt. Jacob has had enough loss in his life as it is.”  
  
     I remembered the accident that had taken Billy’s wife when Jacob had been nine years old, and I remembered my own accident all too clearly. Sitting down on the sofa, I thought about the story Jake had told me about his tribe; was that why Jacob had looked so odd when I had mentioned Edward? Did he know? Glancing at the front door, I turned to Billy and took a breath. “Does Jacob realize that Edward is a vampire? Are the shape-shifters real?”  
  
     “Our stories are just stories to him,” Billy replied, looking up at me with a sad smile. “It’s only a matter of time until the stories become real again, now that the cold ones are back. It’s different this time.”  
  
     “How?” I asked. The anxiety inside me made my heart pump; Edward wouldn’t tell me, but maybe Billy would. “What is different?”  
  
     “An animal can’t hide it’s nature forever. All humans can do is mind that, and make sure they are on the right side when the animals turn on each other.” Billy resting his elbows on his knees, leaning closer. “Jacob will learn his nature soon enough. Will you be on the right side, child?”  
  
     That dark gaze looked right through me, and I found myself lost in it. But then the front door slammed, and I jumped; Jake bounced in, laughing with Charlie about something. He came into the living room and looked from his dad to me, then back again.  
  
     “Are you scaring her with ghost stories again, pops?” he teased.   
  
     “You would do well to be scared, too,” Billy muttered.  
  
     I escaped into the kitchen to help Charlie as Jake and Billy began to squabble. Charlie turned on the oven and laid out the four fish filets onto baking sheets, taking care to grease the pans like I had told him. He seasoned the fish while I chopped up lettuce, tomatoes and carrots for a salad; once the salmon was in the oven, I waved Charlie out of the kitchen so that he could go talk to the guests. By the time I was done throwing together a light dressing and microwaving some rice to go with the fish, the filets were done cooking. I snatched the television trays out from under the sink and dished up the four plates; Jake wandered in and helped me carry everything into the living room, where Billy and Charlie were talking about their fishing trips. It was good to see Charlie laughing.  
  
     “And there was this horrible noise, like a cat caught by the tail,” Charlie said as we came in. “Turns out it was me! I was trying so hard to reel the damn fish in, I was squawking like an idiot. Harry called me Gull for days after that.”  
  
     There were tears in Billy’s eyes as he chuckled. “Those were the days, weren’t they? Thank you, kids...” He stopped and took a bite of the fish; his eyes went wide. “Is this my mother’s old recipe?”  
  
     “Sure is,” I replied. “And my old man here learned how to make it just for tonight.”  
  
     “I’m impressed, Charlie. This is just how I remember it. I haven’t made this in years.”  
  
     Charlie smiled. “It’s a good night for it.”  
  
     “I’ll say. It’s going to be a long winter this year... I can feel it.”  
  
     As everyone finished with their plates, I gathered them up and brought them into the kitchen. The dishwasher was loaded up already, and there were a handful of extra dishes that I decided to wash by hand. Jake came in behind me, wordlessly helping by putting dishes in the side filled with warm soapy water.   
  
     Jake was the first one to break the silence. “What was my dad telling you about when I came in? You looked awful.”  
  
     “Thanks,” I said dryly. Shrugging, I rinsed the plate off and put it on the drying rack; I tried my best to sound disinterested. “He was telling me about the cold ones. And the Cullens.”  
  
     “I can’t believe,” he sighed as he rolled his eyes, “that he’s starting in on that story again.”  
  
     “He seems to think they’re not just stories.”  
  
     “That’s because his grandfather was Chief Ephriam Black. He was supposedly the one who made the treaty between the shape-shifters and the vampires. My dad has been hearing these stories his whole life. His grandpa was still alive when he was little and he heard it directly from Ephriam himself, so I guess he really believes in it.”  
  
     I couldn’t resist asking the question I had been wondering for weeks. “And you don’t?”  
  
     “Do you?” Jake asked. Pausing, he watched my face, openly staring at me when my jaw clenched. “You do. Well, that’s... unexpected.”  
  
     “Is it a bad thing?”  
  
     He was quiet for a time, and when he answered, his voice was quiet. “No. It’s not a bad thing. It just makes me wonder why. Care to enlighten me?”   
  
     I stared at the water that swirled down the drain as I finished up the last dish. His eyes were boring into me, questioning, but I knew that telling him would be a terrible idea. “You wouldn’t believe me even if I told you.”  
  
     “Just because I think it’s all crap doesn’t mean I wouldn’t listen to you, if you’ve got something going on. I know you’ve been through a lot, and if something my dad said made sense in any way, then you can tell me. Charlie wanted me to talk to you tonight, but trust me, I realize you need to do it on your own time. That’s fine.” Jake put his hand on my shoulder when I didn’t reply. He turned me around to face him; his hands were warm against my neck, soothing. “But if something is going on...”  
  
     “Jacob!” Billy called from the other room. “Time to go, son. Sheriff Swanson has work in the morning. Charlie, let’s do this again soon, eh? It’s been too long.”  
  
     Charlie’s voice rose up, cheerful and bright. “Of course. Maybe I’ll head your way next time. It’d be good to come out and see the old stomping ground again.”  
  
     Jake glanced their way, then looked back to me. He let go of me and dug in his pocket; he grabbed a pen from the counter and scribbled something on the slip of paper he pulled from his jean pocket. “If you need anything, at any time, just call me or e-mail me.” He handed me the paper, folding my hand around it and clasping it tight between his strong hands. “Okay?”  
  
     I nodded, not trusting myself to speak as Billy and Charlie headed out the front door. Instead, I pulled Jake into a tight embrace.  
  
     “I love you, heartsister,” Jake murmured into my ear. “Hang in there.”  
  
     “I love you too,” I mumbled in reply.  
  
     With a soft smile, he vanished out into the darkening night. Clutching the paper, I watched out the window as father and son drove off in their 1953, bright orange Chevy truck. The car puttered down the street and was gone; I hugged myself, a war going on inside me as I turned and followed Charlie back into the living room. The shark monster was still on the television, and I stared blankly at the screen as Charlie got ready for bed. We exchanged our goodnights, and I promised to keep the movie down. Giving me a kiss on the top of my head, Charlie went to his bedroom and shut the door.  
  
     I couldn’t sleep. Not yet. When I was sure that Charlie was asleep, I wandered around and made sure the doors and windows were locked tight. I closed the blinds in the kitchen, shut the curtains in the living room... and then stood in the middle of the living room, paranoia crawling up my spine like it never had before. Be careful, take care. The words danced through my mind as I went upstairs, repeating the same procedure. When I did end up in my bed, I curled up sideways, with my back up against the wall so I could see my entire room. I lay there in my clothes, not bothering to change; my heart was racing, and I felt sick. How many times now had I been warned to be careful? I knew it was true, and the suspicions I had been holding back were laying themselves bare more and more each day. I wanted a hero...  
  
     But Edward couldn’t be that hero. It was a fact that hurt my heart, and chilled me to my bones. It was too late to turn back. It was too late to walk away. I had known that the day that Edward had stopped me from getting crushed by Tyler’s van. It had never been something I could have just walked away from, but my selfish and stupid desires had created a problem that, perhaps, could have been avoided. I stared at the locked drawer of my desk, and wondered if maybe it couldn’t have been avoided at all. This was something that had started before me, and I had just been unfortunate enough to get caught up in all of it. So, I could either ignore what was going on around me, or I could do what Erin had said; I could look at what I had been given, and actually figure out what was going on. I had already started down that path, but the infatuation I felt for Edward had kept me from straying farther.  
  
     Infatuation. That’s what it was, wasn’t it? I remembered the way he had glared at me that first day, the way he had snapped at me in the parking lot... and how my mind had felt that day. That wasn’t even to mention that day in the valley, and everything that had happened there. I had never had a boyfriend before; I had never dated. I was broken in more ways than one, and someone had come along to rescue me. He’d been a creature of legend and myth, and it had drawn me to him. He was immortal, unbreakable. It was something I had always longed for, and never been able to imagine... until now. It was the adventure I had always wanted. Now I had it, and I was faced once more with the two paths that I could take.   
  
     Sitting there in the night, pressed against the wall in fear and uncertainty, I made my choice.


	15. Chapter Fourteen

     Sunlight, bright and golden, greeted me upon waking.   
  
     I stumbled around doing my morning routine, tired from a restless night and sore from my awkward position. Although I had come to a decision, it was little comfort; I wondered, as I brushed my teeth and eyed the sharper canines, if it would hurt very much if it all ended badly. There was a new feeling of resolve within me, though, and I determined that I would do what needed to be done regardless of how badly things could end. Edward couldn’t read my mind, and for a while at least, he wouldn’t know that everything I said or did, every smile or touch of my hand, would be a carefully planned act. Nothing more.  
  
     Looking at myself in the mirror, I felt a flicker of remorse. It rose in me, then withered and died as I pictured Erin, and as I thought of his uncle and of Amelia. No fear; no guilt. Taking a deep breath, I left the bathroom and went down the stairs to start my day. Charlie was gone. I’d have the house to myself, nice and quiet, to begin reading the files Erin gave me. I walked into the kitchen and dug around for a spoon. I would just take my breakfast up to my room, and....  
  
     “Good morning!”  
  
     I dropped the spoon with a scream, twirling around to face the unfamiliar voice. Alice Cullen was sitting on the kitchen counter, her golden eyes startled; I pressed a hand to my chest as I scooted as far away from her as possible, suspicion bubbling up and replacing my surprise. “What are you doing here?”  
  
     Alice shook her head. “I keep forgetting that you’re not used to it... I’m sorry for scaring you.” She jumped off the counter and took a step towards me, holding out her hands. “Take my hands. Please. I swear, I’m not going to hurt you in any way.”  
  
     For a moment, I stood there, unwilling to trust her. There was an urgency in her voice, though, and I found myself moving just close enough to reach out and lace my fingers with her own. I blinked as a sudden tingling went through my arms, almost like a static shock. It was followed by a soothing, gentle calmness... it almost felt like the rest of the world had fallen away.  
  
     “There’s no more time.”  
  
     “What do you mean?” I asked. My voice sounded far away. “What’s going on?”  
  
     “I like you,” Alice said quietly as she met my gaze. “You remind me a lot of me. That’s why I’m here. Did Edward ever tell you how my abilities work?”  
  
     “No, he didn’t.” I eyed her, but felt myself relaxing... just a little. “He hasn’t told me much about any of you.”  
  
     “Ah. Well, you see... I can see the future, when someone makes a definitive choice. If people keep changing their mind, it’s very difficult, but once people have decided something I can see how it might end up. At least, until someone else gets involved and makes a choice that affects things.” Alice stopped and have my hands a small squeeze. “The others are more worried about Edward than they are about you. But I like you, Bella, and I want you to be safe. I saw what you chose last night, and I want to help you.”  
  
     I hesitated; I wanted to trust her, but the memory of Edward’s own ability haunted me. “Can’t he hear our thoughts?”  
  
     “Only as we think them, and not right now,” Alice said with a small smile.  
  
     “Now?”  
  
     “You’ve got a bit of a gift. He can’t hear your thoughts, and right now, I’m talking to you in your head.”  
  
     “In my...” I froze, realizing that neither of our lips were moving. “Oh shit.”  
  
     “Not all vampires can, but I’m a bit mental as it is. Apparently, you are too.” She laughed in my mind at some private joke I didn’t understand, a light and melodious sound that made me want to laugh, too. Then the mirth left her voice, and her face darkened. “Edward has been a vampire longer than me. He’s probably stronger than me. I will try and help you, but it’s essential that you make it easier on everyone and listen to me now. Don’t go with him. No matter what he says.”  
  
     “Are you trying to warn me?”  
  
     “I’m trying to save your life.”  
  
     My hands, already cold in her frigid grip, felt even colder as the warmth drained from me. “He’s going to hurt me, isn’t he?” I asked, my thoughts sounding weak and childish in my mind.   
  
     Alice’s eyes were sorrowful. “He will.”  
  
     Reality crashed down with a heavy finality. I inclined my head, looking at the ceiling as Alice’s mind gently brushed over mine. There were wordless murmurs, and an occasional image... faint and fuzzy... that didn’t belong to my own memories. One image came across more strongly, and I felt a tendril of anguish along with it. Curious, I turned my attention back to Alice, who seemed far away. My heart slammed in my chest. “Alice, how many times has this happened?”  
  
     Eyes glazed, Alice leaned in so close that her nose touched mine. “Do you like my breath?” she asked in my mind as she exhaled through he mouth, the floral scent doing something funny with my mind.  
  
     “I don’t understand.”  
  
     “Vampires are predators. We’ve evolved over the years, but our first weapon was poison. It’s how you make a vampire, you know. One bite, that’s all it takes. It floods the system with enough pain, that you think you’re going to die. And then, after a few days... you die. It’s only for a moment. Then your heart starts pumping the venom, and you start to change. Until then, it leaves a screaming, writhing mess. It makes you feel like you’re being burned alive from the inside. But that’s if a vampire can resist. That one bite? That one tiny, itty bitty nip? Sometimes, it’s too much for a vampire to handle, and then you end up with your throat ripped out. You can tell when a vampire drinks human blood, because their eyes are a dark red color; for some reason, vampires that drink animal blood have gold eyes, like Carlisle. It takes so much willpower, and not all of us have Carlisle’s strength. Sometimes, accidents happen.”  
  
     “Did Amelia have an accident?”  
  
     She stared at me for a heartbeat, and I felt a shiver go down my spine, but then a cheerful look came back over her like I hadn’t said anything at all. “I’m sorry. It’s time for me to go, before they start wondering where I went.”   
  
     “Wait. I...”  
  
     “You already have your plan. Keep to it.” Alice released my hands, and the world came flooding back. She moved towards the door; still beaming, she drew the hood to her sweater over her head and offered me a brilliant smile. “You’re a smart girl, Bella. I’m sure you won’t make the same mistake we did.”  
  
     There was a click, and the door opened and shut as if on it’s own. I never even saw her leave; she had, to my humans eyes, disappeared. I checked the door, but it was locked as it had been before Alice had arrived. My head started to throb as I began to feel settled back in my body. It was all a confirmation of what I had suspected, though the looming threat of harm... I had only wondered about it, and now it was staring me in the face. Could Alice be wrong? Maybe something would change by then. Either way, she said to keep on like I planned, and that she’d try to help me. What had bothered me was the last thing she had said before leaving.   
  
     The same mistake we did. Those words were running through my mind as I grabbed a yogurt cup from the fridge and went to retrieve me spoon; when I grabbed it and turned to go to the living room, I noticed the envelope on the counter where Alice had been sitting. Picking it up, I felt my throat close when I saw my name on it, written in Erin’s handwriting. I set my breakfast down and tore open the paper, pulling out the note inside. With it came a handful of photographs.  
  
     My heart in my throat, I bolted for the stairs, ignoring my cramping leg as I ran to my room and locked the door behind me.   
  
* * * * *  
  
 _Bella,_  
 _If you get this message, it means Alice can be trusted. Sadly, it also means I was right about Edward, and it also means I can’t be trusted around people yet. I think about you often, and I wish you the best of luck. I miss you. If Ben comes by, tell him I’m sorry._  
 _\- Erin_  
  
     I read the letter a third time as the files on Erin’s CD opened. My computer grumbled under the strain, but I didn’t care. Finally, with one last groan from the harddrive, the files opened. I skimmed through them in order of date. Going backwards, the first case was Amelia Lancaster. I looked at her picture, one of the three that came with the letter. It was a high school photo, the back said. She had been pale and thin, with dark hair and vivid blue eyes. The reports, of course, said that she had gone missing after being mauled by an animal. Her body had never been found. That had been two years ago, 2003, in Alaska. She had been about my age. The second case was 18-year-old Jennifer Tidly, who was from Idaho and had gone missing in 1997; I read over the file holding a newspaper clipping about her disappearance, recognizing it as the file I had skipped over the other night. She had gone camping with friends, and vanished at some point during the night. The article mentioned a boyfriend, but there was no name anywhere. I looked at her picture, and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. This girl had a light tan and her hair was chin-length, but it was dark brown and her eyes were that same striking blue color. Dumping the pictures on my desk, I went through them all and matched them to the files.   
  
     Ashley Morgan, 17, from Utah; vanished in 1992 during a lone hiking trip, and her body was never recovered. Rachel DeFrey, 18, from Colorado; kidnaped out of her car in 1985 after her friends said she’d met up with a boy, and her body was never found. Whitney Blair, 17, from Nebraska; she never came home from a multi-class field trip one day in 1980. Judy Smith, 16, from Iowa; disappeared during a family hunting trip in the spring of 1972. Ruby Ward, 17, from Illinois; crushed remains found in a dry river bed, identified by dental records in 1963. Charity Smith, 18, from Indiana; found ripped apart inside an abandoned home in 1951. April Harris, 16, from Ohio; found mangled outside a brothel in 1936. Mary Witherdale, 17, from Pennsylvania; charred remains found outside a church, identified by a locket she got from a boyfriend  in 1918.   
  
     Every girl had been an older teenager. Many of them had involved a boyfriend of some sort, though the details grew more vague as I went farther back in time. All the color pictures showed brown haired, blue eyed girls... some tanned, some pale. As the pictures descended into black and white, shrank in size and became nothing more than poor quality photocopies from some dusty library somewhere, it was harder to tell exactly what the girls looked like. Still, all of them had dark hair; their ages matched the pattern of the modern-day victims. And as I lined all the pictures up, I realized that they all looked like me. I pressed a hand to my mouth, trying not to vomit. I had accepted that vampires drank blood, often human blood. This went far, far beyond mere hunting. This was psychopathic. This was the work of a serial killer... a serial killer that was over eighty years old, and mangled his victims like an animal.   
  
_You remind me of someone I once knew._  
  
     I touched the picture, faded and blurry, of Mary Witherdale. Did we all remind him of her? Who had she been? Had she even been the first victim? Maybe Edward had gotten worse after he had been turned into a vampire. He could have started killing before he ever became a vampire, but in the end, Mary was the only lead I had. If I could find out more about her, maybe I could figure out what was going on inside Edward’s mind.   
  
     “Come on...” I muttered as I turned my browser on and waited for it to load. When the search engine popped up, I typed in the girl’s name and waited. “What?”  
  
     Nothing. There was absolutely nothing. Looking up the name Mary and the year also showed nothing. It had been a long time ago, true, but I had at least expected some sort of reference somewhere. Maybe a clue to her family. It was like looking at a ghost, someone lost in the vast expanse of time. It was sad, and I found myself growing furious. How dare someone just end a life like that? These girls had done nothing. There had been no excuse. Alice, Carlisle and the other Cullens were proof that living a peaceful lifestyle was possible. I pushed everything into the desk drawer and locked it, standing up and pacing the room. Grabbing a pillow, I punched it until my hands hurt, rage flowing through me stronger than I had ever felt in my life. That lying, ugly son of a bitch. Oh, he was pretty, but underneath it all was a monster.  
  
     I was still seething when the phone rang downstairs. Dropping the pillow, I hesitated; the phone stopped, but then started ringing a second time. I sighed and kicked the computer off, hobbling downstairs and picking up the phone. “Hello?” I snapped, still irritated.  
  
     “Woah, hey,” Mike said on the other end of the line. “Don’t shoot.”  
  
     “Sorry, Mike. I’ve had a rough morning. What’s going on?”  
  
     He coughed, and I could hear the reluctance in his voice as he spoke. “Ben Colton called everyone today. He came out to everybody. I guess uh... He and Erin had been planning to go to the homecoming dance together.”  
  
     “I knew,” I replied. Sitting down in the living room, I put my feet up and studied my nails; I didn’t know if I could hold my temper back if Mike started bashing Erin or Ben. “What about it?”  
  
     “It’s uh... It’s not that I have a problem with it. What I think doesn’t really matter, I guess. I called because Ben asked for your phone number. He said it was something to do with Erin. The dance was sort of a bust, too many people were upset... especially when Erin’s family said they weren’t going to have a public ceremony, and they won’t invite Ben. It’s really messed up. I told him I’d call and give you his phone number instead, in case you didn’t want me giving your info out.”  
  
     “Sure, that would be fine.” Mike read off the number, and I wrote it down on a pad of paper next to the phone. “How are you holding up? No one else has called...”  
  
     “I’m going to be okay. Angela and Jessica are really upset, especially Angela. I think they’re off dealing with it in their own way, you know. Jessica spent the whole time crying on Saturday, so she and I just left and watched a movie at my place. It sucks. Erin was a good guy.”  
  
     My eyes flicked over to the stairs. He was still a good guy, I thought to myself. “Maybe I should call everyone. It’s going to be a long week.”  
  
     “You can say that again. Jessica is coming over tonight; she really doesn’t want to be alone right now. Would you like to join us for dinner?”  
  
     “Thanks, but I’ve...” I reached for a lie, and found one all too easily. “Got some sleeping to catch up on. It’s been weird, and I have to make dinner for my dad when he gets home,” I added. That at least was the truth. “But give Jessica a giant hug for me when you see her.”  
  
     “I understand. I’ll make sure Jessica gets that hug.”  
  
     “Thank you, Mike. I better get to it.”  
  
     “Take care, Bella.”  
  
     Over the next hour, I called Angela and spent time comforting her. Most of what she said was slurred by crying, and all I could really do was try my best to convince her that things would be okay. I wanted so badly to tell her that Erin was still alive... well, in a way... but I knew it would be a mistake. But then, near the end of the discussion, it almost happened.  
  
     “I just don’t get it,” Angela sniffed. “It’s just... Erin wasn’t into drugs. He wasn’t depressed. I mean, he was mad his uncle died and he was always so quiet about it. No one ever knew what had happened, and he wouldn’t tell any of us. I just don’t think he killed himself. It creeps me out to be alone now.”  
  
     I chewed my lip. “Maybe he didn’t,” I finally said.  
  
     Angela went quiet, mumbling something about having to go clean her room. I hung up to go about my day. It crawled by as I made lunch and studied for mid-terms, every odd noise making me jump. Charlie couldn’t get home fast enough; when he finally got home around seven that night, I was a nervous wreck. The moment he got in the door, I flung myself at him and refused to let go.   
  
     Surprised by my outburst, Charlie gave me a one-armed hug-and-pat, trying to set down his things without dumping me on the floor. “Everything okay, sweetie?”  
  
     “I just missed you,” I said as I dislodged myself from his torso. “What would you like for dinner?”  
  
     “Something warm.”  
  
     As I set about making chicken curry, I watched Charlie move about the kitchen. He checked the phone, sat down at the table and toyed with that day’s paper, then wandered into the living room and back. After he disappeared into his room and came back in his normal clothing, he stood in the doorway and looked off into space.  
  
     “What’s going on, dad?” I asked after a time. “Rough day at work?”  
  
     Charlie didn’t reply at first. “We got done processing Erin’s car, and everything in it.”  
  
     I turned back to the stove, stirring the curry. “That must have been difficult.”  
  
     “Yeah. It’s just... One of our boys found something in the front seat the day it happened, and sent it off to the lab. It came back today.”  
  
     “What was it?”  
  
     “Fur.”  
  
     “Fur?” I stopped stirring; he didn’t noticed, and with my back turned, he didn’t see the expression on my face. “What kind of fur?”  
  
     “It’s just the damndest thing. It was from a mountain lion.”


	16. Chapter Fifteen

  
     It was Monday.   
  
     I sat in the waiting room of the hospital, not knowing what to expect. The only hospital I had ever been to was the one in Phoenix after the accident. Technically, I had been to this hospital as well when I was born, but in some way it didn’t seem to count. I didn’t remember it, and so it was new; it was new, and so I was nervous. It was only the very beginning of the day, and I already felt like the day was ruined.  
  
     A smiling woman at the desk handed me some paperwork when I had first walked in, and I filled it out as best as I could; Charlie had dropped me off with the promise of picking me up once my appointment was done. There were some aspects of the papers I didn’t remember offhand... such as the family history on his side, which my mother hadn’t known, either... but the rest of it was all things I had answered before. How often did I exercise? Did I smoke? Drink? Drink caffeine? Use illegal drugs? Was I pregnant? Was I sexually active? Had I been under a lot of stress lately? Was I taking any medications? When did I first have a seizure? What triggered my seizures? Did I drive? Did I use a wheelchair? Was I homeless?  
  
     The questions embarrassed me. Despite all that was going on, I realized I had it better than a lot of people in my condition. I could easily have been paralyzed in the accident. I could have gotten addicted to painkillers, or been kicked out of a home because I was on disability and couldn’t get enough money for the rent. What must it be like, to suffer with an invisible illness out there, all alone? It was difficult even with people who loved you and cared for you; it seemed impossible, any other way. Vampires and all, I was still more fortunate than some.  
  
     The nurse that called me back was surprisingly friendly. She led me down a hall to the lab, where I would get bloodwork, and she didn’t even make a face when it took me a while to catch up. All of the staff carefully avoided my bad leg, and I got called to the back quicker than I expected. A second nurse, an older man with tiny glasses, was the one who took my blood. He was quick to laugh, deft with the needle and he even gave me a lollipop on my way out. As it turned out, my old doctors had faxed the new doctors my chart, and I would only have to see a new doctor when my blood tests came back.   
  
     “We might have to increase the dosage of you gabapentin,” the first nurse said while she flicked a strand of blond hair out of her face. “The test should be back in within the week. And if you’d like, we can recommend a therapist for your stress. If they think anxiety medication might help, you can come here and talk to the doctor about it.”  
  
     “Thanks. I have a therapist,” I told her. It was true enough, but I hadn’t talked to Nora in over a month. “See you soon.”  
  
     It was such an easy trip, I had trouble believing it was true. It was only noon; I had the rest of the day to read and relax. I was practically whistling as I made my way back down the hall, until I turned a corner... and saw Doctor Carlisle Cullen walking directly towards me. Without missing a beat, I turned on my heel and tried to escape back around the corner.  
  
     “Bella!”  
  
     ... Too late. I forced a smile and turned back to the doctor. “Hello, Doctor Cullen. How are you?”  
  
     “Carlisle is fine, my dear.” His eyes had a bit of knowing in them as he returned my smile, only in earnest. “Quite good. And you? I haven’t seen you since you wound up in the emergency room. I take it things are going well?”  
  
     “I’m just here for a blood test. Things have been pretty good, all in all.” I shifted my foot off my bad leg and tried to avoid his gaze without seeming rude. “Char... My dad is going to pick me up, so I better be going.”  
  
     “Why don’t I drive you home?” Carlisle offered with way too much cheer. “It’s my lunch break, and I could use a little jaunt.”  
  
     “Sure,” I replied in a tiny voice. My good mood had evaporated faster than rain on the sun. I wanted to scream and run the other way, but I didn’t want to look suspicious. Besides, Carlisle had never been anything but nice to me. “That would be great, thank you.”  
  
     Carlisle beckoned me towards the exit. I followed closely, being sure to wave to the Smiling Woman at the front desk; she waved back, and I felt some relief in knowing someone saw me leave with Carlisle... just in case. We entered the parking lot, and I stared at the sleek, black Mercedes that beeped from the front row of cars. It seemed almost blasphemous to touch it; the paint gleamed even in the cloudy weather, and I glanced at Carlisle one more time. He grinned and waved me in, and I slid into the front seat without further goading.  
  
     “This is a gorgeous car,” I breathed as I buckled my seatbelt. It purred it life, and I felt myself becoming almost giddy. “Maybe I should become a doctor. Wow.”  
  
     “It’s difficult work,” Carlisle said quietly, his upbeat demeanor mellowing out. “As I’m sure you know.”  
  
     We drove in silence for a few minutes; ever so often, I could see him glancing over at me. “Do I need to talk about the vampire in the room?” I finally asked. “Because we both know it’s there.”  
  
     He gave me a kind smile, but it faded as soon as it had appeared. “I don’t expect you to know or understand everything that goes in to being as we are, in this world. We have to move about every ten years. People start getting suspicious when we never look like we’re getting older. We have to get new identities, start fresh. And while I don’t blame you a bit, I must say I am a bit disappointed in Edward for getting so close to a human again. I wish he would have more discretion. It happens every so often, but it usually doesn’t get this... involved. I’m surprised.”  
  
     It suddenly occurred to me that he didn’t know. There was a genuine look of puzzlement on his face, and my heart broke. “Carlisle, I...” My throat refused to work. Shaking my head, I looked out the window as we drove through the city. “Why did you turn Edward into a vampire?”  
  
     “It was in Illinois, during the Spanish Flu pandemic in 1918. His mother was dying, and he would have died as well. It hurt me to see a promising young man die so painfully, and to be honest?” He let out a slow sigh. “I had been alone for so long. I wanted a friend. None of the other vampires I had met shared my vision. It was nice, to have someone that I could teach and raise as my own. It was selfish of me, I know. But I saved his life, and I love him like a son.”  
  
     “Did he ever drink human blood?”  
  
     “You are a curious one, aren’t you?” Carlisle asked, glancing at me. His expression was caught between amused and baffled. “Esme adapted well to a diet of animal blood, as did Rosalie and Emmett. Alice has shown great restraint over her years, since she knew of our coven. Jasper... he’s hanging in there for Alice. Edward... Edward had a rough start, and I wasn’t the best teacher yet. He had a time where he wandered off and tried to find his way. But he came back, and he has been true to our coven’s vision ever since.”  
  
     “Ah.” It was a poor reply, but I wasn’t sure how to proceed.   
  
     He was on my street now, and as he pulled up to my home, Carlisle stopped the car and turned to face me. “Are you worried about what might happen? Because if you’re--”  
  
    “I’m not terribly worried about myself,” I interrupted. “But I do wonder, if it came down to it, who would get your protection. I’ve heard you’re a good man, Carlisle. A friend of mine said he hoped I would be on the right side, when the time came. I hope the same of you.”  
  
    Carlisle stared at me for a long time before opening the car doors. “Goodnight, Bella.”  
  
     I stepped out of the car and shut the door. “Goodnight, Carlisle. Thank you for the ride.”  
  
     Walking to my home, I didn’t look back. All I could do was hope that I hadn’t just made a horrible mistake.  
  
* * * * *  
  
     “We’ll have to increase your dose,” the doctor on the phone told me. “Your gabapentin levels are a bit low, which explains why you’re having breakthrough seizures here and there. It might also explain your tremors, but that could also be a side effect of the medication. It will have to be a wait and see sort of thing. Can you come in on Friday?”  
  
     It was a cold, dismal Wednesday morning. I made the appointment and, defeated, slunk up to my room so that I could be in a bad mood. Tuesday had slinked by without incident, and when the phone had rang, I almost expected good news. Upping my medication wasn’t the worst thing in the world, but I knew that there could be an increased risk of side effects with an increased dose. It wasn’t a pleasant thought.  
  
     Rather than moping around the house, I decided to wipe down the kitchen after I made myself breakfast. I took my frustrations out on the dishes, then attacked the floor with a broom and swept all the dirt into one pile. Unable to find a pan, I swept it right out the front door and moved on to dusting. Completely covered in dust bunnies, I stripped down to my skivvies and did all my laundry; while the washing machine worked it’s magic, I made myself a meatloaf-lettuce-tomato sandwich and pulled out a well-worn copy of _Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban_. It was almost surreal, reading it now... If vampires and werewolves existed, and if a mere human like me could talk to a vampire in her head, why not wizards and dragons? Thinking about the bloodstone rock on my desk upstairs, I wondered if the rock magic woman in Port Angeles had been that crazy after all.  
  
     The washing machine finished and the clothes went into the dryer; from the dryer, I grabbed new clothes and went off to take a shower. By the time I was done, I was too tired to really care about the medication anymore. If it worked, it worked; if it didn’t, then I would try and find something that did. Towel-drying my hair, I stepped into my room and went back downstairs, eager to get back to the book. The moment my foot touched the floor, the phone rang. I grumbled, and I considered letting the answering machine take it, but it could have been Charlie.   
  
     With a sigh, I stomped into the kitchen and picked up the phone. “Hello?”  
  
     “You look good in red,” Edward’s voice greeted me. I glanced down at the long-sleeved red shirt I had put on, and resisted the urge to cross my hands in front of my chest; I had no way of knowing how he had seen, considering I’d had the blinds closed. “I’d really like to meet with you. Are you busy today?”  
  
     “I’m glad you like it. What were you thinking?” I injected as much excitement into my tone as I could without sounding fake, and placed a lie where it was needed. “I have a couple things I need to do, but I can figure something out.”  
  
     “I was thinking the park.”  
  
     No way in hell was I going to meet him somewhere that deserted. “Could we go to the coffee place instead? I’m craving cappuccino massively. I’ll be by there anyways...”  
  
     There was a pause on the line. “Sure,” Edward replied. “I’d love to. Would around one o’ clock work for you?”  
  
     “That sounds great. I’ll see you then.”  
  
     “See you.”  
  
     I set the phone down and pressed my hand to my chest. If Edward was still watching, hopefully he thought it was from some sort of stereotypical girlie swoon. In a way, it was; his voice had that sweet honey quality, the kind that could slip its way inside you and wrap around your brain and your heart. It made you want to believe that everything was okay. For a moment, I considered calling him back and saying that I would love to go to the park... but then I picked up the phone and called Mike instead.   
  
     “Heya,” Mike answered. He sounded awful. “Who’s this?”  
  
     “It’s Bella. How are you?”  
  
     His voice sounded a bit brighter. “Oh, hey Bella. I didn’t recognize the number. I’m doing okay, I guess. Getting ready for tomorrow and all that. How about you? Are you okay?”  
  
     “Sort of. I hate to ask you for a favor at a time like this,” I said. “Would you mind dropping me off at the coffee place? It’s... I’m meeting Edward Cullen there, and I really can’t get there myself.”  
  
     “Why doesn’t Edward pick you up?” Mike wondered. When I hesitated to reply, he made a noise, and sounded a bit too happy. “Gotcha. I can’t say I’m surprised or anything, no offense. It’s okay, I’ll get you there. I need to go get myself a burger, anyways. I’ll drop you off. What time?”  
  
     “Thank you, Mike. A little before one o’ clock?”  
  
     “Can do! Do you want me to pick you up afterwards, too?”  
  
     I smiled. “Nah, I’ll just call my dad. I don’t want to bother you too much.”  
  
     “It’s fine,” he said with assurance. “What are friends for?”  
  
     And so it was settled. I had my story, I had my ride and I would just hope that things would go smoothly. Edward didn’t give me any sort of indication of why he wanted to talk, but we were supposed to be dating, and it had been a few days. He hadn’t sounded angry, but that didn’t mean anything. I glanced at the clock, my stomach twisting; I only had about half an hour before I had to go. Flopping on the sofa, I picked up the book and kept reading. It would calm my nerves a bit. By the time Mike showed up, I wished I had a Patronus charm of my own... if it would even work on vampires. I fled the house and hopped into Mike’s car with a smile. He patted my leg as he drove off and headed into town.  
  
     “Who’s breaking up with who?” he asked with a curious glance my way. “Do I have to beat him up?”  
  
     “It’s complicated. I’m... I don’t really know.”  
  
     Mike nodded; for the first time, he seemed to actually understand that I didn‘t want to talk about something, and he cared enough to leave it alone. “It’s personal, you mean. Jessica’s been sort of prying into my emotions lately...” he trailed off with a shrug. “I know she cares, but it’s annoying. I feel like crap. What else can I say?”  
  
     “Thanks for understanding.”  
  
     “I’ll still beat him up for you, if you want.”  
  
     I laughed, and that’s where the conversation ended. We pulled up to the coffee place, and he gave me a thumbs up as I got out of the car. I waved at him and went inside as he drove away. It didn’t surprise me that Edward was already there, waiting; I smiled as I sat down in the seat across from him. He returned the smile and my stomach did little flip-flops. Ignoring them, I instead focused on the cup of cappuccino that he pushed towards me.  
  
     “I got you one when I heard Mike coming with you,” he said. “It has caramel. Is that what you wanted?”  
  
     “Exactly,” I said. Although I didn’t want to drink anything he’d ordered without me looking, I took a sip and kept on smiling. I would have to hope it wasn’t drugged. “Thank you.”  
  
     “He seems to think we’re breaking up.” Edward’s voice was teasing, but the look in his eyes was sharp. “Apparently he thought it was a good idea.”  
  
     “Wishful thinking, maybe. He has Jessica. I know she’s not as pretty, charming and graceful as I am,” I added with a dramatic hair flip, “but he’ll have to make do.” I took another sip of the coffee and leaned in, trying to look to keep the playful tone going. “If I wanted to break up with you, I’d be calling Buffy, not sitting here.”  
  
     Edward seemed to think that was funny; he laughed. “I wasn’t planning on spending our whole date being jealous, don’t worry.” Folding his hands, his smile faded as he became serious. “I know you love me, Bella. That’s why I want to talk about your future.”  
  
     The butterflies his laughter had created inside of me withered and died in an instant. “Oh?” I asked as I swirled the coffee in the cup. “What part of it would you like to talk about?”  
  
     “What would you do if you could live forever? No worries about money, time or health. What would you do?”  
  
     I froze. The question had thrown me off-guard, but it wasn’t not something I had never thought about. Ever since I’d heard about vampries when I was small, I had wondered what it would be like to be immortal and what I would do with that time. It hadn’t been that long ago that I’d considered the idea again, with the full knowledge that it was a possibility. “I would learn how to play the violin,” I started, answering honestly. “I’d get a nice car and drive across the country. I’d learn to swim, and I’d climb mountains and snorkel and... Well, all sorts of things. I wouldn’t have to worry about cramming for Spanish finals anymore. Maybe I’d learn Greek and go see where my ancestors came from. All I really want to do is see the world.”  
  
     Edward lowered his voice, so quiet that I almost didn’t hear it. “I could give you that world, Bella. I could give you the world. No more being sick, no more medicine. You would be almost invincible. You could do whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted. We could be together forever, you and I. You’d be part of our family, and then what would any of them be able to say?”  
  
     The offer shook me. I turned to the coffee and sipped it, using it as a way to give me time to think. I had to say no. I couldn’t say yes. If I said yes, I’d be bound to him forever, wouldn’t I? What power would he hold over me in those days of pain? That was pretending he would be able to resist the bloodlust Alice had mentioned, and as all the faced of those girls... those girls that looked too much like me... flashed through my mind, I knew that if I said yes, it would be only a matter of time before I ended up like them. But maybe they had ended up that way because they said no? Edward was watching me, his gaze becoming more and more annoyed, and I knew I needed to reply.  
  
     “I need to think about it. It’s a generous proposal.”  
  
     “You don’t want it,” Edward said flatly. “I thought you loved me?”  
  
     My mind scrambled for an answer, any answer. “I do love you. But it would be really difficult for Charlie to accept, you know? He needs me right now. If I just up and leave, he’ll be heartbroken.”  
  
     For a moment, Edward looked like he was ready to snap. But just as quickly as the rage had appeared, it was replaced by a gentle, understanding smile. “Of course,” he crooned. “I know Charlie means so much to you. Take all the time you need. I’m not going to go anywhere.” Seemingly back to normal, he tilted his head and grinned. “Did you really just make a Buffy reference?”  
  
     “What? Joss Whedon is a genius.”  
  
     We spent the next half hour talking about Joss Whedon films, and for a time I felt almost like a regular girl. For a time, Edward seemed almost like a regular guy. We laughed; we talked about music, books and movies. He talked about his trips around the world and his adventures within the United States. I relaxed and enjoyed the conversation, nearly forgetting myself in the process. It was so easy to forget that it was all an act, and it was in these times that I wondered if maybe all the accusations were a mistake.  
  
     While in the middle of a sentence, Edward stopped and glanced at his watch. “I have to go. Carlisle is going to be home soon.”  
  
     “Alright,” I said as I gathered up the jacket I had brought with and followed him to the door. In truth, I felt a pang of sadness at his departure; I had never known someone who shared so many of my interests, and the draw I felt to him was hard to argue with when he stood right in front of me. “It was good to see you.”  
  
     Edward opened the passenger side of his car, and looked at me with a smile. “Here. I’ll give you a ride home.”  
  
     “Oh, I...” I took a step towards the car, but a wave of coldness made me stop. _Don’t go with him._ “Uhm.”  
  
     “What’s the matter? Get in.”  
  
     Just then, Ben turned the corner and waved at me. “Hey Bella!” he yelled, jogging up and glancing at Edward. “Hey there, Cullen. How are you?”  
  
     “Fine,” Edward replied shortly. “Come on Bella.”  
  
     “Actually, Bella, I’m glad I caught you here. I was driving to your house to look for you. Charlie needs us both to come down to the station. It sounded pretty important. I said I’d come get you.”  
  
     I withdrew away from the door; heat returned to my body. “I hope everything is okay,” I said to Ben. Turning to Edward, I tried to keep my voice steady as I saw the way he glowered at Ben. “Sorry. I’d better get going. Maybe next time.”  
  
     “Maybe.” Edward turned that baleful gaze on me. “Take care.”  
  
     Ben put a hand on the small of my back, leading me towards his car without a word. The back of the four-door Passat was covered in blankets and a tarp; I hesitated, but I got in the car. Ben didn’t say much as he got in and started the car, but I noticed that he kept glancing in the rear-view mirror. We said nothing as he drove towards the police station; when we pulled up to a stop in the parking lot, Ben grabbed my wrist as I went to get out of the car.  
  
     “What are you doing?” I asked. “Charlie--”  
  
     “I lied,” Ben replied. “Just wait a second, okay? I need to catch my breath.” He let out an exhale, rubbing his face with the palms of his hands. “Erin sent me to keep you safe. I didn’t really believe it at first, but then you were there with Edward, just like he said you’d be.”  
  
     “I was safe.”  
  
     Ben stared at me. “He almost had you.”  
  
     “I was going to call Charlie to come get me,” I grumbled, feeling defensive.  
  
     “I’m sure you would have,” Ben replied as he touched his hand to my arm. “I’m not blaming you. Vampires have this ability to draw people in, and it’s worse once they get an emotional attachment going.” He shook his head. “I can’t believe all of this; I don’t even understand half of what I’m saying. Erin told me as much as he knew, which wasn’t much. I guess Alice Cullen met him somewhere, with the other ones.”  
  
     “Other ones?”  
  
     “I don’t know. He didn’t say much about them, but I guess they’re different from the Cullens. They have red eyes or something. There were three of them. Rough looking bunch. They agreed to get him somewhere safe.”  
  
     “That’s good,” I said. I wanted to be sick; were those the vampires Edward had talked about when he said there were others? They sounded awfully close to Forks, but Erin could have been anywhere. So could have Alice. It’s not like distance mattered as much to vampires. But vampires with red eyes... ones that drank human blood. It was a scary thought, and I wanted very much to be in the safety of a building with a bunch of cops. “Charlie doesn’t know we’re coming?”  
  
      “Nope, but he said it would be safe.”  
  
     A nervous smile tugged at my lips. “I’m glad you’re adapting to this.”  
  
     “Erin would watch stupid horror movies with me in exchange for me playing World of Warcraft with him. I guess vampires are just old hat.”  
  
     “You’re not scared?” I asked. “This isn’t a movie. We could get killed.”  
  
     “I know that.” Ben rubbed the back of his head as he glanced out the window. “I’m terrified. That doesn’t change anything.”  
  
     “And the memorial service tomorrow?”  
  
     “It has to be done.”  
  
     I couldn’t see the grief on Ben’s face, but the note of finality in his words was crushing. It wasn’t a surprise, and I could see where Ben was coming from; even so, there was little I could say. “I’m sorry. I know you two were close. He really wanted to be with you.”  
  
     Ben didn’t answer. His shoulder twitched, and a few minutes later, he rubbed his face and turned back to me with a broken smile. “Let’s go pay your dad a visit, huh? I’m sure he’ll be surprised to see us.”  
       
* * * * *  
  
     Charlie was, indeed, surprised to see us. He didn’t really ask any questions, but he put Ben and me to work shredding papers. We stayed out of the way and silently went about our assigned chore; Ben seemed thankful for the quiet, and I didn’t mind it myself. No one bothered us, even though some of the cops wandering by gave Ben an odd look. As it passed seven o’ clock, I stood up and went to look for Charlie. I thought I saw him hanging out by the water cooler, but when I tapped on the man’s back...  
  
     “Sorry, Officer White,” I said as I blushed. “I thought you were my dad.”  
  
     “If I had a dollar for every time someone mistook me for Charlie, I could retire,” the older man said with a gruff laugh. His eyes were a dark brown, rather than blue, and his voice was deeper from years of smoking. “Have a good night, Isabella.”  
  
     Ducking my head, I scurried off to keep looking. As it turned out, he’d come to find me.  
  
     “There you are,” Charlie said as I approached, all his stuff packed up and ready to go. “It’s time to head home. It was good to see you, Ben. Thanks for coming to help out.”  
  
     “No problem. It was cool to get to hang out with Bella and get a little bit of community service in,” Ben grinned. He patted me on the shoulder as we all walked out into the night. “See you tomorrow. Sleep well.”  
  
     “You too. Night.”  
  
     Charlie arched an eyebrow at me as we got into his car. “What was that about?”  
  
     “We’re having a private memorial for Erin tomorrow at six,” I replied. “Ben was Erin’s boyfriend. He didn’t want to be alone all day, that’s all.”  
  
     “Oh.” Charlie kept his eyes on the road, looking confused for a moment. Finally, it seemed to click. “Oh! Well, that makes sense. If he starts acting funny, you be sure to tell someone. I don’t need another dead boy on our hands. People get like that, sometimes.”  
  
     “Did you ever feel like that?”  
  
     “You mean...?”  
  
     “I mean hopeless. Lost. Like everything was done and over, and there was no way it could ever get better.”  
  
     Tapping his fingers on the steering wheel, Charlie drove on in thought for a few minutes. “Right after your mother left. I talked to someone, and things did get better. But for a long time, I felt like my whole world had been torn apart. It’s normal to feel that way sometimes, I think. But if it doesn’t go away, then it’s a good idea to get help.”  
  
     “Luckily, I’ve always been a little ray of sunshine.”  
  
     My joke worked, and Charlie laughed. The rest of the ride home was thus saved from the impending gloom, and once home, I was able to make chicken enchiladas without having to deal with the uncomfortable silence that often came with discussions of my parents’ divorce. We watched some Jet Li movie, and afterwards, I headed up to my room to finish reading. My nerves were still frayed. At about ten o’ clock, Charlie peeked his head in my room.  
  
     “I love you,” he said. “Are you sure you’re okay?”  
  
     It was tempting to tell him everything, right then and there. Instead, I smiled like everything was normal. “I’m a bit tired, and I have to go in to the doctor on Friday to get my meds increased. But I’m fine otherwise, I promise.”  
  
     Charlie nodded. “I’ll be sure to find a way to get you there.”  
  
     “Thanks, dad.”  
  
     “I’m going to head to bed. Don’t stay up too late.”  
  
     “I won’t. Goodnight. Love you, too.”  
  
     Not long after, I got up and stretched, getting ready for bed. The blinds to my room were opened; I made my way to the window, looking outside. I thought I saw movement in the woods. Slamming the blinds closed, I grabbed the letter opener from my night stand and curled up in the same back-to-wall position I’d gotten used to over the last few days. If I was going to become someone’s midnight snack, I wasn’t about to go quietly.


	17. Chapter Sixteen

Naturally, I survived the night, despite my paranoia; thanks to my off and on sleeping, I woke up at noon. My back was stiff upon waking, and at some point my weapon had fallen off the bed... and under it. To celebrate my status as a living creature, I turned on my computer’s music player and blasted it as I got ready for the day. It was something I hadn’t done in a long time; the last time I had danced around to music was before the accident. While I couldn’t dance around very well, I could still shake all my better assets and fling my arms around like a dork. With the K-Pop singer Psy yelling in the background, I Right Now’d my way into the shower; after grooving about in a towel while I grabbed yogurt from downstairs, I changed into a tasteful black blouse and a pair of jeans. Outside, the wind whistled along; I tossed a hoodie onto my bed for when I left the house.

I decided to file my finger and toenails, painting them with a dark blue polish. It was probably vain, but I wanted to pamper myself and put a little effort into my appearance. Not because it mattered, but because for the first time in weeks, I felt in charge of my emotions. I wanted to take some me time before the memorial service; it kept my mind off of it, and the more put together I was when I got there, hopefully the less chance there would be that I would break down. I wanted to be strong for my friends. Flapping my hands, I glanced around the room and wondered what I could do while my nails dried. Remembering what Charlie had said about my mother, I went over to my desk and carefully sat down.

I delicately turned on my computer and headed for my e-mail account. Ignoring the mountain of e-mails from my mother, I composed a new message rather than bothering with the inevitable amount of drunken rage that the e-mails contained.

_Dear mom,  
I apologize for taking so long. A friend of mine died, and I’ve been dealing with a lot. I’m going to his memorial service today with some friends. I went to the doctor on Monday. They are going to increase my medication dose. The hospital was really nice. There’s a boy I’m seeing, Edward Cullen. His dad drove me home. He’s a doctor. How are you doing?  
Love,  
Bella_

After sending off the one e-mail, I opened another and typed the address Jake had given me into the proper field. I wanted to send him something, but I didn’t know what. I sighed and let my mind wander, rather than trying to force anything.

_Hey Jake,  
This is Bella. Thanks for giving me your e-mail address. I have to go to a memorial service today for my friend, and I wish you were here to go with, but I didn’t think to ask anyone. Let your dad know I’m listening to his advice and being careful around Edward Cullen. I still think you should listen to him. He’s a smart guy. Anyhow, I just wanted to send this to you and give you virtual hugs. I hope you’re doing well.  
Love,  
Bella_

I stopped, hitting send and leaning back in the chair. Unlike the internet, the copy of Spider Solitaire on the computer ran smoothly. It ate up about half an hour of time before I got bored, and with my nails dry, I decided to go look for something more substantial than yogurt. Whistling as I went downstairs, I dug out an extra enchilada left over from before. The music had switched from Adele, to Pink and to Motorhead. I finished my lunch and danced my way into the kitchen as Rhianna’s Disturbia came on, putting my plate in the dishwasher and loading up the dishes from the night before. 

There was a small pop noise, and I stood by the sink listening for a moment. There was nothing else; it had probably been the speakers on the computer. I set the dishwasher and turned to head back upstairs. My music stopped playing. I froze, then snatched the phone as a hideous crash came from upstairs. Dropping to my knees, I pushed myself under the dining table and into the corner, dialing 911 and trying to keep myself calm.

“There’s someone breaking into my house,” I whispered as a woman came on the line. I gave her my address. There was another crash. “Please hurry. They’re upstairs in my room.”

“Just stay on the line, hun,” the woman said soothingly. “They’re on their way. It’ll be just a minute.”

A minute was all it would take for a vampire to rip my head off and punt it to the next county.Shaking, I tried not to cry out as the third crash rocked the entire house. Just then, the sounds stopped; in the distance, I could hear police sirens. Closer, closer... there was one last slam, and then the front door burst open.

“Police!” a strong voice yelled out. “We’re coming in.”

“They’re here,” I said to the woman. “Thank you.”

“Good luck, dear.”

Three police officers swarmed in, all of them heading off into different directions and calling it clear. Charlie followed them in, looking around. “Bella? Where are you?”

“Daddy!” I burst out from under the table, wrapping around him and crying.

Charlie hugged me close. “Are you okay? Did they hurt you? Did you see who it was?”

Just then, one of the officers came down the stairs; she ran a hand through her black hair, shaking her head. “Hey Sheriff. You’d better come have a look at this.”

Peeling me off of him, Charlie gently handed me to the female officer. “Stay with Officer Perez for a moment, okay?” Charlie ran up the stairs, entering my room. He stood in the doorway for a moment, then looked over his shoulder. “... Bella, come here.”

I hesitated, then slowly made my way upstairs, still shaking. As I reached the top of the stairs, Charlie moved out of the way; I stared at my room, my mind unable to comprehend what I was seeing. My computer had been shredded. Parts of plastic, metal and wires were everywhere, and the monitor had been punched in. My desk...a heavy, oak creation... had been snapped in half like a twig. Half of it was across the room, thrown so hard that it had gone through the wall. The window had been popped off its hinges. Looking at it all again, I realized that the locked drawer had been ripped out of the desk; I ran over,ignoring the glass biting into my feet.

“Bella, hey, stop! You’re-- Bella?”

“Oh no. Oh no, no, no.” The drawer was empty. The CD was nowhere in sight. The papers and bottles that I had foolishly though would disguise the photos were scattered around the room. “God damn it.”

Charlie didn’t even comment on my swearing. He waded through everything and grabbed me, picking me up like a child and carrying me out of the room. “Come on. We need to get you out of here before you hurt yourself any worse.”

It was then that I noticed my feet were bleeding. Charlie took me downstairs and put me on the sofa. He muttered something at one of the other officers; the guy ran off and then came back with a First Aid kit. I winced at Charlie took tweezers and removed shards of wood and glass from the computer monitor. He dabbed alcohol on them and wiped some sort of gunk on the wounds before wrapping them in gauze. The whole time, neither of us spoke; the three officers mulled around, looking disturbed. 

Once he was done, Charlie stood up and looked at them. “Can you excuse us? I need a minute alone with my daughter.” They nodded and left, and Charlie turned his attention back to me. “I’m only going to ask this once, and I expect an honest answer. What the hell is going on?”

My voice came out in a pathetic whimper. “I can’t tell you.You’ll lock me up.”

“Bella, if you’re in legal trouble, I can help you.”

“I mean in the loony bin!” I wailed. “You’ll think I’m crazy.”

“What’s crazy is someone breaking in a second story window from the outside, with no ladders or trees to climb. What’s crazy is that someone chucked half of a desk through a wall. Please, Bella. Just tell me.”

I took a breath, trying to find the words. “You know how you got mad at Billy for saying the Cullens were bad people?”

Charlie’s expression was puzzled. “Yes.”

“He was right. Sort of.” 

“What do you mean?” He suddenly sat down, looking more angry than I had ever seen. “Did Edward do this? Is that why you don’t want to tell me?”

“They’re vampires,” I blurted out. “Billy’s ancestors were shape-shifters. Carlisle made a treaty with Billy’s ancestors, saying they wouldn’t hunt on Quileute land in exchange for the elders not telling others about what the Cullens were. That’s why Billy doesn’t like them and...” I stopped as Charlie stared at me. “You don’t believe me.”

“Keep talking.”

“And...” I fought to find some coherence. “Edward saved me from getting crunched by Tyler’s van. He stopped it with his hand. So, I... I liked him. Even after he told me what he was. And Angela had told me about Amelia and what happened in Alaska, and I didn’t believe her. But then Erin told me his uncle was a private investigator and had been looking into the case, and that his uncle was murdered.” At this point, Charlie stood up and was pacing. “Erin got sick after that. He didn’t take drugs, dad. He was sick because someone bit him. Vampires... Vampires have poison. It’s how they turn other people into vampires. Erin didn’t kill himself. He got turned into a vampire. And then Alice Cullen came by, and tried to warn me about Edward. She gave me an envelope from Erin, and there were all these pictures inside of girls from murder cases. They looked just like me, daddy, and...”

Charlie sat next to me as I started crying again. “Can you remember any of the girls’ names?”

“Uhm... Amelia Lancaster. Jennifer Tidly. Ashley Morgan. Judy Smith. There were others, but...” I wiped my eyes. “Mary Witherdale was the first one. She was found burned in 1918. Carlisle said that’s when he made Edward a vampire. I think Edward killed them all. I... He was supposed to be a good one. Carlisle said they only drink animal blood. But the CD Erin gave me with all the files is gone. All the pictures are gone.” My voice went out, and I sat there for a moment, burying my face in my hands while Charlie stood up and looked out the window. “Edward kept telling me to stay away from him, and then he told me he wanted to be with me forever, and that he could do it. I told him I couldn’t leave you. And that’s when Ben and I came in, because Erin told Ben I was in trouble. And Ben told me there were others, ones that weren’t good, and... Edward said he liked to hunt mountain lions. He said they put up a good fight.”

“You said Alice Cullen gave you the folder from Erin.”

I lowered my hands, wondering why that one detail was the only one he chose to address. “Yeah, why?”

Charlie didn’t answer. He took out his radio and punched a few buttons. “Hey, can someone get a number for Carlisle Cullen?” he asked. There was silence, and then someone read out a phone number. Charlie grabbed the phone from the other room and came back, punching in the number and waiting. “Carlisle? This is Sheriff Swanson. Look, I don’t know what the hell to believe anymore, but if what my daughter just told me is right, then you better go find Edward before he finds Alice. Edward just broke in and took a bunch of stuff relating to murdered girls. Yeah, she’s okay. I don’t know, Bella said Alice gave her photos of Mary Witherdale and some others. Alright, good luck. Bye.”

I stared at Charlie. “You believe me?”

“I believe that you’re telling me the truth, as you know it. And Carlisle sure seemed to believe me when I called. They’re going out to look for Edward right now.

“Are you INSANE?” I finally yelled. “Now he knows you know! What if Edwards finds out that you know? He could kill you!”

“Edward already knows that you know, and there’s no way in hell that I wouldn’t notice the little redecoration upstairs. I think it’s logical to say that we’re all in big trouble right now. I don’t suppose he ever told you how you kill a vampire?”

“No.”

“Convenient.” Charlie scratched his head. “Okay, I want to take you back to the station. It might be a little safer there. ”

I didn’t say anything as he helped me up and I limped out to his car. The other officers were still there; the two men were in one car, and Officer Perez was in a K-9 car, a big black dog watching us from the back seat. Officer Perez left first and the two men drove behind us, putting Charlie and I in the middle. As we drove back to the station, I began to wonder how we could ever go back to normal again. Surely a vampire couldn’t survive a handful of clips of ammunition? We had six cops in our city, and a few that could come over from La Push. But if Edward could, then what? Would Carlisle take care of him? If Edward escaped, then he would come back one day. Of that, I was sure. I couldn’t live in fear like that. 

There was only one solution.

Charlie put me in his office with him, and I told him everything I knew. Everything that I had been told about vampires, I told him. I repeated the Quileute legend, and Charlie tapped his chin in thought while I spoke. After a few hours of sifting aimlessly through paperwork, Charlie picked up the phone and dialed a number. He hit the speaker phone and waited.

“Hello?” Billy Black’s voice asked. 

“Hey Billy, it’s Charlie. You’re on speaker phone right now. I have Bella here, and I’ve got a few questions to ask you.”

Billy sounded unsure. “Sure thing. What’s up?”

“Did you tell her that the Cullens were vampires?”

“... No. I think that was Jacob.”

Charlie glanced at me. “But you know the story.”

“Everyone knows the story. It’s why we boycotted the hospital when the Cullens moved into town.” Billy’s voice turned irritated. “If you’re calling to start that all up again, I’m--”

“Billy,” Charlie snapped. “I just want to know how you kill the damn things, okay?”

On the other end, Billy was silent. “You have to cut them up,” he eventually replied, “and burn the pieces. But legend says that only one of the wolf warriors has the strength to take apart a cold one. There are no wolf warriors. Not yet.”

“Wolf warriors.”

“Shapeshifters,” I offered from my seat in the corner. “People who can turn into wolves.”

Charlie pressed his fingers to his temple. “What do you mean by ‘yet’? Are we going to have werewolves running around, too?”

“Werewolves are something else. Our wolf warriors would be able to transform upon hitting puberty, at a certain point when their blood called it out of them. I don’t know what causes it, but it is passed through the family, and I know the signs. So far, I have counted over ten of our people who are showing signs. The last time, there were only three.”

“What does that mean?” I asked.

“They say that it only happens when the cold ones are near, and the more that show the signs, the greater the number of cold ones.”

Charlie and I shared a look. He set his elbows on his desk, the color draining out of his face. “Sounds like trouble. You have no idea when these wolf warriors will be ready to fight?”

“No. It could be tomorrow, it could be next year. I believe that it will happen when the cold ones make their first move.” Billy went quiet, then sighed. “I’m sorry I can’t help you more, old friend. I never got called to fight, otherwise I would be there for you now. The only other thing that--”

A younger man popped his head in, his deputy badge gleaming in the office lights. “We need to run, Sheriff. A woman’s being attacked over by animal control.”

“Thanks Billy. Isabella, handle the phone.” Charlie leaped up and raced to the door. He turned and quickly shot me a cop look. “And don’t leave.”

I watched Charlie, his deputy and Officer White all leave. “Sorry about that, Billy.”

“It’s alright. His city is like his family; he has to protect it, even if it can be dangerous. He would have made a fine Quileute,” Billy chuckled before his voice became serious again. “Fire, even if it won’t kill a vampire on it’s own, can be useful. The cold ones are sensitive to high temperatures. Sunlight won’t kill them, either, like movies say. But I heard a story that the sunlight will weaken them. I’m sorry that it has come to this.”

“Thank you for all the information,” I replied. One question lingered in my mind, and I couldn’t resist. “Billy, is Jake showing signs?”

Billy let out a breath. “I’d better go. It’s time.”

There was a click, but before I could be angry about being hung up on, one of the male officers bolted past the door. I jumped up and leaned out of the office, watching the last three officers grab their things. “What’s going on?”

“Officer down,” Perez called out as she ran from the building. The other two were already gone. “Stay here!”

My throat felt as if I had swallowed cement. It couldn’t be Charlie. The universe wouldn’t be that cruel. I wandered out from the back and into the front of the building, where the receptionist was working. She was the only one left in the office, and I didn’t want to be alone again. She gave me a sympathetic look as I sat down on a chair, but she said nothing; it wasn’t her place to say anything, even if she did know what was going on, and I didn’t blame her. As the silence dragged on, I felt a sliver of pain enter my head. My hands shook as the pain got bigger and deeper, like a knife being driven into my head. I clasped my hands on the side of my mind, pushing back; in that moment, I knew I wasn’t safe. Everyone who could protect me had been drawn away.

A glance at the clock told me it was almost six. Just as I thought of Ben and the memorial service, I saw a movement outside the police doors. Ben opened the door and popped his head in; the receptionist glanced at him but said nothing. “Hey. We’re having the service at the cemetery right now. Come on.”

“I’ll be at the cemetery with Ben if Charlie comes back,” I said, and the woman nodded as she picked up the phone. Striding out of the building, I went up to Ben, who was glancing about. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to pick you up. There’s not much time.”

I didn’t argue, and I stuck close to Ben as we hurried to his car. “What’s this memorial service really about, Ben?”

He started the car and hit the gas, flying out of the parking lot and towards the edge of town. “Edward was going to track you down and take you. Alice saw his plans, but she couldn’t come get you herself. She couldn’t see you, but Erin could, and he sent me to get you. You need to be there, okay? Just trust me.” He pushed the gas more, and the car howled down the road leading out towards the cemetery. “We just have to hope that this car travels faster than my thoughts.”

We skidded into the cemetery a minute after six. There were two cars already there, and through the darkness, I could people moving through the trees. Getting out of the car, Ben handed me a candle and lit it with a lighter that he pulled from his jacket pocket. It was cold, and I mourned briefly for the hoodie that had been left at home. When we got to the cemetery, no one was there; blinking, I looked around for the people I had seen earlier. Nothing. It was like we were alone.

“You loved Erin,” Ben suddenly said. “Right?”

“Of course I did. He was my friend.”

He looked at me closely before speaking again. “What price would you pay?”

“Ben, I don’t think...”

“Would you gamble your life?” Ben asked.

I shifted, wrapping my arms around myself and shivering. The question scared me, but the answer was obvious. “I would.”

“So would I. It’s why we’re here tonight,” Ben said softly. “Erin trusted us, and so we’re here to get justice.”

“What are you talking about?”

“We’ve all gathered here,” Erin’s voice said from the dark as he stepped out of the trees. “And we only have a few minutes to decide our next move. Edward Cullen has been killing people for almost a hundred years now. His family moves from place to place, and kills along the way. Amelia Lancaster was murdered, and my uncle was murdered because he got too close to the truth. He turned on me, too, but somehow I survived. Edward has made Bella his newest target. She told her dad everything, and tonight, he was attacked.”

Carlisle appeared, his pale skin glinting in the faint moonlight overhead. “Do we know this to be truth? I have never witnessed these events. I am hesitant to bring judgment down on the head of someone I call my son.”

Erin stepped out from the darkness, standing close to me; I could see golden flecks in his eyes. “Mary Witherdale was the first. Does that name mean nothing to you?”

“I remember that name,” Carlisle admitted. “But I also am honest in saying that Edward made mistakes. Vampires live by a different law than humans do. Sometimes we make mistakes in our hunger. Is he to be faulted for making a mistake?”

“No,” Jasper said quietly from the darkness. I could see him now, leaning against a tree and running a hand through his curly blond hair. “But I fed on humans long before I met any of you, and I can say that while feeding is not the fault of the vampire, the brutal nature of Mary’s death was not the result of hunger. Mary was a vampire.”

A female voice joined the others; the woman herself did not make herself visible. “Vampires prey on vampires, when desperate. A feeding quarrel?”

“And what of Amelia, mother?” Jasper asked.

Rosalie, devastatingly beautiful, appeared among the gravestones. “What of her?”

“Erin speaks the truth.” Jasper paused. “I know, because I had to bring Edward down off the killing edge. He was the one who killed Amelia. He said it was his first, but I believe Erin when it says it wasn’t. You didn’t see him that day. Accidents happen, but torture like that is purposeful, refined over time. Surely you have seen what happens when you release a pretty young woman into a camp of war-weary...”

“Jasper,” Emmett warned. Jasper fell silent. Emmett looked at me; his imposing form was partially in the darkness still. “She looks a lot like Mary. Amelia, too.”

“Enough.” Carlisle held up his hand. “Alice won’t be able to run Edward much longer. I don’t want to believe this, but I will believe you until I can get the truth. We will restrain Edward and bring him to the Volturi. He may answer for any crimes he has committed there.”

There was a sudden burst of chatter, almost like a room full of people muttering all at once. Erin put a hand on my shoulder, but it did nothing to calm me. Rosalie was moving her lips quickly, angrily, and Carlisle was doing the same back to her. I didn’t know what a Volturi was, but all of the younger Cullens looked like they were shouting at Carlisle, and he looked heartbroken. 

Suddenly, a woman stepped between the two groups and held her hands out. She was small and slim, but she commanded a presence unlike anything of the others. Strength flowed from her... and love. Her features were softer than the others, and waves of warm, caramel-colored hair flowed across her shoulders. Everyone fell silent, and I knew then that I was looking at the matriarch of the Cullen family. Her gentle eyes held sorrow, but her soft voice... the female voice from moments ago... was firm. “It hurts me more than I can say, to even consider what we are going to do. It hurts me even more to see you fight over this. Stop now. We need to stand together. Alice is coming, and Edward with her.”

At first, I didn’t notice any change, but a quick glance around me revealed that Erin... still touching my shoulder... was holding Esme’s hand. Carlisle was holding Esme’s hand, and his other arm was around Rosalie’s waist. Emmett had his arm across Rosalie’s shoulders. Jasper was touching my other shoulder, and Ben was slightly behind Erin, his cheek on Erin’s shoulder. I realized it was like a living wall, and then I felt a crackling electricity move down both of my arms. It flowed into Erin and Jasper... and kept going. I could feel it touch each one of them, finally connecting with Esme. She smiled a small, sad smile at me as I felt like my mind floated above the group. When Alice arrived, I barely noticed. Jasper took her hand, and I was even farther away from my body. 

“He’s coming,” Alice’s voice breathed through my head. I was suddenly aware of her wearing my hoodie. “He thoguht Bella was with me. But...”

Edward strode into the cemetery, his eyes on Alice; he looked furious, but the anger melted into a concerned expression as he saw me. “Bella! I’m glad my family found you. I was looking everywhere for you. We have to get you somewhere safe.” He looked to Carlisle. “There is a group of hunters. They attacked a woman, and when the cops arrived... I tried to help them, but I was too late. Bella,” Edward was burning a hole into my heart with that sorrowful gaze. “Charlie got killed. I heard about it on the news. I’m so sorry. We have to hurry, though, before they catch up.”

My heart ached. I tightened my grip on Erin’s hand, but I said nothing.

“Son,” Carlisle said quietly. “We’re not going anywhere.”

Edward looked at each of us, and his gaze fell on Erin and Ben. “Why are they here?” he snapped, the anger back in full. “I thought he was dead!”

“I guess it’s just a night of surprises,” Erin replied. He stepped forward, just a bit between the two of us. “Sort of like how you say Charlie died, when the news said it was Dave White. But maybe you thought he was Charlie, when you sank your teeth into his throat.”

Edward curled his lips back into a sneer. “Are you going to let him talk to me like that?” He took a step forward. Emmett surged forward just then, a guttural roar escaping his throat. Edward crouched, snarling back. “Is this the thanks I get?” he yelled. “Is this what I get for saving your life, Bella?”

“What about Amelia, Edward?” Jasper asked. “What about all the others? Did you save them, too?”

“You bastard.” Edward stared at Jasper, his hands clenching. “I don’t know what you’re talkign about! Amelia had an accident! You know that!”

“I know you savaged her until there was nothing left, and had me roll her body into a ditch for the vultures to have,” Jasper replied bitterly. He broke away from Alice and me, moving to stand by Emmett. “It was no accident.”

“Nor was I turned into a vampire by accident, either,” Erin said as Carlisle moved, too, and I saw our group slowly forming a circle around Edward. Erin didn’t move from my side, nor did Ben. “You thought you tore me to shreds in the woods. I guess the venom worked a bit faster than you’d have thought.”

Edward’s voice rose into shrill yell. “Traitors! The whole lot of you!”

Esme stepped forward then, her voice soft. “Edward, you have been my son for so long. Please, have wisdom. If you are innocent, then come with us. I love you. We love you. We want to help you.”

“Help me?” He was screaming now. “Is that what you call hauling me in front of the Volturi? Oh, that’s right. I can see right into your skulls, even with that bitch clouding your thoughts.”

The wind shifted, and suddenly Carlisle turned, facing behind us. I turned around in time to see three figures walking towards us, moving with such ease that they seemed to float on the air. The one in front, who I assumed was the leader, was a tall man with black hair pulled into many braids. His skin was dark under the vampire pallor, and he was almost as muscular as Emmett. The woman behind him had hair like flame, red and orange billowing out in the breeze; twigs and leave were matted in the curled locks, and she flexed her hands as if she was about to pounce at any moment. There was a male at her side, and my blood turned to ice in my chest. He wasn’t as tall as the other men, and he was slim... but with his flaxen hair pulled back into a ponytail, combined with his beat-up pants and his faded leather jacket, I recognized him as the man who had chased off the thugs in Port Angeles. His eyes, which I had thought to be blue, were a bright, feral crimson. He didn’t seem to see me, and I didn’t call for his attention. My earlier feelings of gratitude were replaced by terror.

The blond moved faster than I could see, heading towards Edward. Carlisle moved then, roaring as he got between the stranger and Edward. “Stay out of this!” 

In that split second, I found myself being crushed to the ground as the clearing erupted into activity. There was a crash as Erin landed, yards away, on one of the cars. Edward was on top of me, his nail digging into neck. I tried to fight back, but all I could do was struggle uselessly; I felt my mind beginning to black out, and my back arched in a spasm. Ben was on top of him in a flash, and I gasped for breath as Edward moved from me to Ben. There was the sound of bones cracking, and Ben was screaming. Esme and Rosalie were fighting back the red-headed vampire, and both Jasper and the darker skinned vampire were peeling Carlisle and the one called James apart. My heart was slamming in my chest, and it hurt to breath; the smell of blood filled the air, and I did the one thing I knew how to do. I ran.

Alice caught me when I stumbled, grabbing me by the arm and carrying my malfunctioning body to the cars. Erin was off the one car, but the windshield was shattered. I could see Erin running at Edward, and to my shock, he ripped Edward off of Ben and managed to throw him like a rag doll. But then Edward was gone... completely. Carlisle was limping, and James was gone, as were his two friends. Erin, holding the limp body of Ben, was snarling at Jasper, who was being yanked back by Emmett. Rosalie was nowhere in sight. Esme came up to our side, putting a hand on my shoulder; she said something to Alice, but all I could focus on was Erin. He carried Ben with him, and as Ben gave off a strangled sob, I realized in a muffled horror that the boy was still alive. Alice let them into the back of the Jeep, closing the door behind them. It was only then that I heard what was going on, with Esme giving everyone orders.

“Carlisle, you and Emmett find Edward. Rosalie on on his scent, but she isn’t powerful enough to keep him held down. Alice, you and Jasper take Bella and run. Get as far from here as you can. Try to stay away from cities Edward might recognize. Don’t read road signs. Keep your eyes on the road.”

“What about my dad?” I asked. It hurt to talk and I kept seeing stars, but I forced the words out. “If he’s still alive... Edward tried to kill him. What if...”

“I will find your father,” Esme said. “And I will protect him.”

“What about...?” Emmett jerked his thumb to the back of the Jeep. “What do we do?”

Esme shook her head. “Help our friend do whatever he decides should be done. I refuse to make that choice for someone. Go. Be safe.” I was zoning out again when Esme touched my arm. “I’m sorry we had to meet this way, Bella. Hopefully the next time we meet, it will be on better terms. I wish you nothing but the best.”

She was gone before I could reply; Alice helped me into the back of the Jeep and slammed the door. Erin had his eyes closed as Alice gunned the truck and took us onto the road. By the time we hit the road, everything had faded into black.

* * * * *

“Thank you, Laurent. We owe you.”

I woke up in Jasper’s arms, naked and wrapped in a soft blanket. Alice had my clothes, and she was feeding them trough the window to the dark-skinned vampire. Laurent. It was a pretty name. My whole body hurt, so I settled with watching everything around me. Most of it sounded like gibberish, but I caught peices here and there.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s been a long time coming, with what I’ve heard in the last twenty years. It’s the least I can do, throwing off that prick’s scent for a few more days. This is the last time he ruins someone’s life. I’m going to head out, though.”

“Where will you go?” Jasper asked.

Laurent sighed. “I’m heading east. James and Victoria are running north after Edward, but I have no interest in this. I think we both know where it’s going to end. James is lethal... there’s nothing like him. Your Edward will be dead by morning.” 

Erin was standing outside the car with Laurent, Ben still in his arms. “I’ll meet up with you all in a few days. Laurent will keep us safe until it’s over.”

He was leaving; I couldn’t let him leave without saying goodbye. I stirred, murmuring Erin’s name. Laurent met my eyes, his face friendly but curious. “I think your pet is awake.”

“Bella?”

I moved my arms when Alice said my name, motioning to outside. My limbs felt like lead, but the more I moved, the better I felt. “Erin,” I said louder. My eyes opened, and I struggled against the blanket. “I want to say goodbye.”

Jasper held tight to me as he got out of the car. He didn’t set me down, carrying me blanket and all over to Erin and Ben. I reached out, touching Erin’s cool cheek; his eyes were almost completely golden. “Are you okay?”

“I will be,” Erin answered, his eyes glimmering in the moonlight. “Ben and I are going to go have a nice talk. We’ll see what happens after that.”

I moved my hand to Ben’s bloodied hand, touching it. Ben’s eyes opened, and his lips twitched into the barest of smiles. “You leaving us already?” I felt my own eyes mist up as Ben turned his eyes to Erin, and tears rolled down his cheeks; Erin’s expression reflected nothing but love. “Goodbye for now, then.”

“Goodbye for now, Bella,” Erin whispered. “Travel well.”

Laurent went to the truck window and lightly touched Alice’s hand. “Get a move on, my sister. They’re going to be telling this story for a long, long time, but I want it to be because you survived.”

“Go in peace,” Alice said, handing Laurent something. 

He pocketed the item, giving Alice a bow of his head and turning to Erin. The three walked off into the night as Jasper got back into the car with me; he still held me in the blanket, and I didn’t care. When the others had vanished, Alice punched the gas of the truck. The truck rumbled to life and ate up the road ahead at a terrifying speed. I closed my eyes, drifting in and out of sleep as my body tried to recover from the seizure. I opened my eyes when the car slowed to a stop; I recognized my home outside of the car window.

“Do we have time?” Jasper whispered.

Alice made a sound. “We do. Edward is far north now. He can’t hear us, and he won’t double back around for at least an hour. By then, we can be out of here. Bella, kiddo... You awake?”

I forced myself to reply. “Yeah, I’m awake.”

“Can you stand up yet?”

Jasper opened the car door, and I slid out, still in the blanket; I didn’t even have shoes. After a few test steps, I nodded. “I’ll be okay.”

“Alright. We’re going to go inside, okay? I’ll help you get your medication, and some new clothes. We only have a few minutes though.”

I let Alice lead me up to the house, still a bit unsure of my footing. She pushed the door open like it was nothing, and we went inside. It was dark. I fumbled around, and pointed out where my meds were; she grabbed them, and then we went to the laundry room. I pulled some things from the dryer, things I’d never had a chance to put away. Alice helped me get on my underwear; humiliation wasn’t even a concern for me anymore. Jeans, and then a shirt and a jacket from the front walk. I slipped on a pair of sandals I had stored in the closet, knowing there was little wisdom in wearing summer clothes on the verge of winter, but having no other choice. I paused near the door, then went into the living room and looked at the bookcase. I knew Charlie had hidden a gun up there, an extra for protection. Standing on my tiptoes, I felt a cold sense of satisfaction as my fingers wrapped around steel. Taking the gun and holster, I dug around in the kitchen drawer and found the extra ammunition. 

I had just gotten the holster secured to my hip when Alice grabbed my arm. “We have to go,” she said, rushing to the door. “Hurry.”

We got out of the house, but before we could cross the sidewalk and get to the car, James appeared in our path. He turned his eyes to me, and I felt the strength sap from my legs. “Don’t be afraid,” he purred. “I’m not going to hurt you... yet.”

“James,” Alice said with a cautious tone. “It’s been some time.”

“It has, Alice. Did you miss me?”

Her grip on me tightened. “Stand aside, James. Your quarrel isn’t with this girl.”

“It never is, but that’s the way things end sometimes.” James never took his eyes off me, and he slowly moved closer. Alice didn’t move; eventually, James was so close that he could touch me. He wasn’t as impressive in stature as Edward, but there was a control and power in his gaze that Edward never possessed. Although he didn’t have the refined beauty of Edward, he had a presence that made my eyes water in fear; he was a monster, a walking force of destruction, and it showed in the cat-like movements of his slim, lithe body. “Ah, but she does look a lot like Mary. Poor little doe, lost in the hunt.”

Alice pulled back her lips and let loose a feral snarl. Despite her tiny stature, the sound she unleashed was pure fury-- it was the sound of a creature that was not to be toyed with. I could sense the tension in the air, and there was a definite look of wariness entering James’ face as Alice flexed her hands like a cat would flex its claws. The red-eyed demon backed away a few paces, but didn’t move from our path.

“There is nothing as foolish as love,” James said quietly, bitterness hardening his expression. “Do as you will. Tonight, my hunt will finally succeed. You will not stop me.”

Finally, the blond stepped to the side. Alice scooped me up in her arms again and was off like a shot. She threw me into the Jeep and shut the door, hopping into the passenger side as Jasper slid into the driver’s seat. Jasper spun the wheel as I got my seatbelt on, and we were off again. He drove faster than Alice, faster than Edward. We were out of Forks within minutes, and where we were heading, I had no idea.

I touched my chest, waiting for my breath to catch up. “Who is that guy?”

Alice sighed. “James hunts other vampires,” she said. “He has skills that make him an excellent hunter, and he never stops once he gets started. For the last eighty-seven years, he’s been hunting Edward. Edward is the only vampire who has been fast enough to escape, and because we tend to live in areas where there are few people... We don’t run into other vampires that easily. I keep an eye on him, at any rate. I can tell when he’s coming. That’s when we move.”

“Hunting Edward?”

“That’s the thing,” Alice looked out the window. “His name is James Witherdale.”

My fingers gripped the seat. “Witherdale...”

“He is Mary Witherdale’s brother.” She met my gaze in the rear-view mirror. “And he wants revenge.”


	18. Chapter Seventeen

It was dawn before we stopped the first time.

I roused as the car stopped; we were at a gas station. Jasper guided me to their bathroom, standing guard as I took care of business, and then lending me some money for something to eat. The guy at the front was surprised at the amount of stuff Jasper let me get, but Jasper muttered something about not stopping for a while. I took that as a hint and I bought some bottles of water on top of it. He rushed me back to the car, and we were off again. Alice sat in the front seat, her eyes closed. Jasper was wearing sunglasses, and I wondered if it was in an attempt to make things less distinguishable if, somehow, Edward was able to read his thoughts.

The scenery was strange to me in the dim morning light as we passed through a town, the streelights still casting their orange glow across the old-fashioned brick buildings. I could barely make out mountains, but they were flat and far away... not the tall, snow-capped and majestic things by Forks. There was a light dusting of snow on the higher mountains we saw, but otherwise the surroundings were rather dry looking. It was a sea of brown, dusty ground and silver brush scattered across it. The long, straight road seemed to go on forever, and it was on this road that Jasper gunned the truck. We flew through the area, and I didn’t dare to look at the speedometer. I watched the landscape whirling by, finally spotting mountains ahead. Going over a pathetic looking river, the mountains grew closer, closer... and then there was a bend in the road, and we were in farmland. A plane flew low overhead, and the truck growled as Jasper hit the gas again. 

Mountains rose up again, on both sides of the road. Jasper slowed the truck down as the mountains became more and more frequent, and winds occasionally battered our car. A deer bolted out in front of us at some point, and I remembered that day back in the forest. Jasper pulled over about two hours after we passed another small airport. I was grateful for the chance to stretch my legs, and Alice stayed with me as Jasper disappeared from my sight. Minutes ticked by, and Alice said nothing as we wandered back to the truck. We leaned against the truck and watched the clouds; I cleared my throat after a time, hoping Alice would start up a conversation while we waited for Jasper. Nothing.

“What is Jasper doing?” I asked after a few more minutes, curious and growing tired of silence.

“Hunting,” she replied. Alice waved her hand at the sun that was trying to fight it’s way through morning clouds. “It’s going to be daylight soon, and we’ll need to find a place to stay for the day if it gets too bright. Our clothing can protect us for a bit, but the heat will be too much. The good news is that Edward won’t come looking for us if it’s too sunny. The bad news is that Jasper is still tempted by human blood, and you smell like the best bacon cheeseburger on the planet.”

I blushed. “Oh...” I felt sorry for Jasper, now knowing how difficult the entire trip was going to be for him. It made the fact that he’d been holding me in his lap without shredding me even more amazing. “I’m sorry.”

Alice laughed quietly. “Don’t be sorry, Bella. It’s not your fault. Due to blood chemistry, some people just have a more tempting smell than others. I just hope you don’t have a... biological emergency at some point,” she said with an awkward pause. “That could get a bit complicated.”

“Uhm, I...” I trailed off, trying to figure out how to explain it without being blunt. “I tend to not be a regular bloomer, if you get what I mean. I’m good for a while I think.” I twiddled my thumbs, noticing a ring on Alice’s hand when she brushed her hair back. “How long have you and Jasper been together?”

A brilliant smile crossed her face. “I found him in 1948. I went into a diner one day, and there he was, just like I saw in my vision. We’ve been together ever since. We got married in 1950, not long after we found the Cullen family. It was beautiful.” She ran her fingers along the simple gold band. “Rosalie and Emmett tend to get married every so often, but Jasper and I... once was enough. We were married the day we joined hands and walked down the aisle together. The only ones who need to know it are the two of us.”

“It sounds like you two love each other very much.”

“He was all I had,” she said wistfully. “It was 1920 when I got changed into a vampire. I didn’t have anyone else before that, either.”

“I thought you don’t remember anything from before?”

“Sometimes I get feelings. Not memories, so much as hunches about how something was, or someone will say something and it makes sense. I don’t remember who changed me into a vampire, or why. When I woke up, I was alone and hungry. I didn’t know what had happened to me at all. But I know that no one came looking for me. No one wanted me.”

I kicked a pebble, not knowing what to say. For a moment, I cursed the fact that I was too much like Charlie-- emotions and sharing our thoughts weren’t always our strong suit. I usually liked being private, but I wanted to comfort Alice in some way. “Well, those people were stupid,” I finally said. “If I had been around back then, I would have wanted you to be my friend.”

Her smile returned, and she scooped me up in a big hug. “We’ll make it through this, and when we do, we’re going shopping.”

I laughed. “I’d love to.” When she set me down, her shirt rose up a bit on her arm, and I noticed a silvery mark on her wrist. “What was that?”

Alice became very still; she pulled down the sleeve, her eyes turning away. “An old wound. It’s nothing, just a scar.”

“Did James do that to you?” I asked. She stared at me, and if I hadn’t known any better, I would have thought that she looked paler than before. “You seemed to know each other.”

She wrapped her arms around herself, and it took her a while to answer. “We’ve met before. Once.” Alice shrugged, but the emotion on her face betrayed the casual gesture. “It was the first time James found Edward. It was the only time James found Edward, until now. I got in the way.”

“I’m sorry he did that to you.”

“It wasn’t James,” she said as she looked at me. The haunted look in her eyes was almost physically painful to see. “It was Edward.”

I opened my mouth to reply, but then Alice was climbing into the truck; Jasper jogged up, looking bright and cheerful. I expected him to be covered in blood like Edward had been, but he was as fresh and clean as he had been before he’d left. He whistled merrily as we all got back in our seats, and the adventure began again.

“You two are awfully quiet,” he commented. It didn’t matter that we’d all been quiet for hours before. He raised one hand and made wiggly fingers in the air. “May I lighten the mood?”

Alice and I both murmured an agreement, and within minutes, Alice and Jasper were both up front belting out pop music lyrics with the radio blasting. It was like there was a euphoria in the air, and I found myself singing along with them when I knew the lyrics. As we crossed the state line into Nevada, the song changed from some hard rock screamo song... into an all-too familiar 80s tune. 

“Oh, this one is apt!” Jasper said cheerfully. “Hey Bella, do you know this one?”

Alice bounced in her seat. “It is!”

“No way...” I shrunk back into my seat, burying my face in my hands as Jasper and Alice began a duet. “This isn’t happening.”

“We’re no strangers to love,” Alice started off, her normally pretty voice turning into what I guessed was supposed to be a sultry croon. 

“You know the rules, and so do I!” Jasper joined in with an almost identical tone.

“A full commitment's what I'm thinking of...”

“You wouldn't get this from any other guy!”

It was then that I realized I was probably the first human to be Rickrolled by vampires. It was almost a touching thought, an almost momentous moment in the scope of history.

“NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP!”

“NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN!”

... Almost.

* * * * *

Our next stop was a small town, dusty and almost claustrophobic in it’s atmosphere. It made Forks look like a bustling city, and the looks we got when entering the only restaurant made me huddle closer to Jasper. The residents were examining us like a scientist might examine an insect, and the person at the bar seemed indifferent to our presence. He was a tall man, with bronze skin and long, black hair pulled back into a ponytail. Paiute, maybe... Jake had once given me a history lesson about various tribes across the United States. 

Alice approached him, smiling that pixie-like smile of hers. “Hi there! Could I order a water for my sister? We’ve been driving a while.”

“Yep,” the man said, turning and grabbing a to-go cup. “That all?”

“Are there any places to stay around here?” she asked, handing over some money and passing the water to me. 

“You’ve got the motel over that way. It’s not too bad.”

“Thank you! Have a great day.”

I sipped my water as we left, watching the sky. It was almost nine o’ clock, and the sun was coming out in full force; Alice and Jasper both had light, long-sleeved jackets with their hood pulled up, and their sunglasses on. I thought I saw a faint glow from their hands, but those were soon tucked into their pockets. We made it to the car, but just as we were about to get in, five guys came out of the bar and headed out way. They were big, like the bar tender, and one had an odd tattoo on his arm. They all had the same tattoo, upon closer inspection. I wondered if they were a gang, but I didn’t want to find out; Jasper urged me into the car, and I went.

“How long are you staying?” asked the one in front. 

Alice’s voice stayed friendly. “Oh, not long. We’re only stopping to rest.”

The man looked to the others, then spit on the ground. “Be out of here by dusk. Your kind isn’t popular here.”

Alice’s face darkened. “Well noted. Thank you for your kindness.”

They turned and swaggered back into the bar, seemingly pleased with their intimidation tactics. Jasper and Alice hopped into the truck, talking in that low muttering I had heard before. I couldn’t understand the words, but the irritation in Jasper’s voice was clear. Alice sounded less annoyed, but I didn’t want to bother them to see what was going on. Clutching my water cup, I waited until we were in the safety of the motel room to ask questions. Jasper checked in, and there was a small exchange between him and the woman at the front desk. Alice herded me towards our room, and I didn’t get to hear what was being said. 

The room was small, with only one bed, an old television set and an overhead fan. There was a tiny bathroom, and a small fridge in the corner. Alice closed the blinds of the only window, then ripped the sheets off the bed; Jasper helped her cover the window with them. I sat on the floor, flopping on my back and stretching my legs out. The fan whirled to life as Jasper turned it on, and Alice sat down next to me. The three of us sat in silence for a while; the two were busy peeling off layers of clothing until they were in pants and t-shirts. 

“That looks painful,” I said as I saw their hands. In just the short time outside, both Alice and Jasper looked like they’d sustained bad burns. “Will it heal?”

“Soon,” Alice said. “Jasper will heal faster, since he just fed. By tomorrow, it should be fine. It’s just painful for a bit.”

“Is that what sun does to you, then?”

Jasper flipped the television channels. “Mostly. There are a few other things, but this is bad enough of a reason. Some vampires get less sensitive as they age, but warmth is always a problem. It’s why most vampires in warm areas only come out at night, and the older ones tend to only come out in the day when the sun is less intense, like in the winter.” He laid back against the bed. “Once the sun gets under the horizon, we’ll get out of here and keep driving. I paid the nice lady up front enough to make sure she didn’t see us. Besides, if Edward comes through here...”

“I don’t think Edward will want to come through here,” Alice smirked. “I wanted to come this way for a reason.”

Jasper groaned. “Figures.”

“Are you talking about those guys back there?” I asked, now that it seemed less concerning. “What was their problem?”

“Furballs,” Jasper grumbled. “A medium-sized pack.”

I blinked. “Shapeshifters? You mean there’s MORE of them?”

“Of course.” Alice turned the television to Jeopardy and left it there. “The Quileutes aren’t unique in their ability to shapeshift. It’s much more common to find shapeshifters in warmer weather anyhow, since it’s better for their bodies. I guess you could say that their our polar opposites in that respect. The pack in La Push is a bit odd, but I’m sure their ability developed out of need. And honestly, maybe there’s a bit of magic involved. Who am I to say what does and doesn’t exist?”

“Regardless,” Jasper said, “they don’t tend to like us vampires. The sooner we get out of here, the better.”

While Alice and Jasper watched television, I curled up on the sheetless bed and took a nap. I’d been feeling more tired lately, and as I drifted off into sleep, I hoped that I wasn’t getting sick. Dreams flitted through my mind, with wolves running through a forest and howling at the moon that hung in the sky, bright and full. One wolf turned and looked at me, and his brown eyes looked human. He pulled his lips back in a snarl, and ran back towards me. I saw a flash of pale flesh, and my breath left me as I was wrapped in cold; the wolf lunged over me, teeth bared...

I sat up with a gasp. Alice shot up at the same time, her eyes turned towards the window. Jasper stood up and gathered our things, putting everything back as it was while Alice walked to me and led me outside. It was just barely dusk. “What’s going on?”

“Edward is on the move. He’s heading towards Florida.”

I stopped, digging my heels in before we got to the truck. “That’s where my mother is living.”

Alice frowned. “There’s nothing we can do from here. He probably thinks you went that way. We have to get somewhere safe, and now. We’re heading south, and meeting up with the rest of the coven in Elko. They’re not too far away. We’ll travel in force from there and branch off as needed.”

“But if Edward is going towards Florida...”

“James is following us.”

It didn’t make sense. Why would James be following us, if he was after Edward? Shaking my head, I still refused to move. “I need to at least call my mother. What if he goes after them to try and get at me? I have to warn them, if nothing else.”

“Okay,” Alice said as she scooped me up. “Tell them whatever you want. Just do it in the truck.”

Jasper was in the front seat by the time we got there, with the engine running. I got into the backseat; unlike before, Alice sat next to me in the back, her hand on my knee. She handed me a cell phone, and I focused on my family before worrying about our seating arrangement. Dialing the number, I growled when I got the voicemail. “Mom, this is Bella. Call me as soon as you get this. It’s an emergency. Love you.”

From five o’ clock to six o’ clock, I tried the number again three times. Each time, I left a message. By the time it was seven o’ clock, there was still no reply. I curled up in the seat, trying not to cry. Instead, I let anger flow through me; anger was, at least, useful. Anger didn’t make me feel helpless. I worked myself up, thinking over all the things Edward had done. A sign went by saying we were almost in Elko, and it was then that Alice’s phone rang. 

I snapped it up, recognizing the number. “Mom?” 

“Hey sweetie,” my mother greeted me, her speech slurred. I could hear talking in the background, and what sounded like airplanes. “What’s going on?”

“Mom, where are you?”

“Phil and I are at Phoenix airport. We’re taking a break from Florida for a bit. Sweetie, are you okay? You said it was an emergency.”

Relief flooded through me. “Look, my boyfriend kind of went psycho. He ran off, and I’m worried he’s going to try and find me. You and Phil need to be careful, okay?”

My mother snorted. “Well unless he has wings, he’s not going to get to Phoenix tonight. Did you talk to Charlie about this?”

“I uh, left Forks.”

“What?” she screeched. “Where the hell are you heading?”

Holding the phone away from me, I winced. “I’m in Nevada. I’m not sure where I’m heading at the moment.”

“Are you driving? Bella, god damn it, you’d better not be--”

“I’m not, mom! My friends are!”

“Well put those damn friends on the phone! I need to know where my--”

Alice snatched the phone from my hand. “Hello ma’am!” she said cheerily. “I’m sorry that this is so sudden, but Bella will be just fine. We’re going to be heading to Elko to pick up my family.” There was indiscernible screaming on the other end of the phone. “I understand that, ma’am. See you soon.” Suddenly, Alice snapped the phone closed. “Jasper, turn around. Now.”

Jasper swung the car around without question. He drove back the way we came, hitting the gas at the sound of her urgency. “Where are we heading?”

“Keep going south, on 278.” Alice opened the phone again and dialed a number. “Carlisle, it’s Alice. Meet us in Saint George, Utah. James keeps herding us south. We need to get him off our tail. Mm, see you then.” Alice hung up and glanced at Jasper. “How fast are you going?”

“Eighty,” Jasper replied.

“How fast can a vampire run?” I asked, sinking down into the seat.

Alice tapped her chin. “About a hundred miles per hour, but Edward is much faster than that. We clocked him at about 150 miles per hour, once. But they can’t keep that speed for more than a few hours, mostly at night. We’ll have at least a day’s advantage, if he gets to Florida and realizes your mom isn’t there. But still, James can easily make a hundred miles. Jasper?”

“On it,” he said, stomping on the gas and racing the car up to 120 miles per hour. “Hang on, folks.”

The mountain roads were rough, and at several points I felt like I was going to puke. Alice was too busy to talk... she kept mumbling to herself, and I knew she was watching people in her mind... but she held my hand the whole way. It was only when I looked up and saw she wasn’t speaking, when I realized I was hearing her in my mind again. I closed my eyes and listened to the soft whispering, grateful for it’s soothing nature. I felt a small touch upon my mind, and I realized that Alice had developed a mental shield... like me. It was like two bubbles meeting, gentle and maleable, but neither of them gave way. Neither of us tried. I was an only child, but in that moment, I felt like Alice was my sister, as I felt that Jake was my brother. 

We rolled through the city of Eureka, and I was allowed to stumble out of the car and finally throw up in a ditch. We carried on, going through another mountain range and passing through a patch of desert that shimmered in the moonlight. I watched the stars, marveling at how many there were in these lost lands, far from cities and guided only by the road and the glow from the headlights. I fell asleep as we passed by Ely; my sleep was filled with images, half-formed and fleeting, but the sleep was deep and I woke up feeling rested. Hours had passed, and we were rolling into the city of Saint George. Jasper pulled over into a fast food parking lot; Esme and Emmett were the first to arrive, followed by Carlisle from a different direction. Rosalie was the last to arrive, and her face was stoney as I got out of the car and joined the group. I ignored her, sticking next to Alice and Jasper as everyone gathered together.

“Where do we stand?” Esme asked. No one spoke, and so she gently prodded everyone. “Does anyone have a plan? I know we are all weary, but surely one of you has an idea about what to do.” 

Carlisle was silent at her side; he looked tired, and there was a fading claw mark across his cheek. “I think we all know what we have to do. Edward is beyond reach. if we can’t get him to the Volturi, then... Do you have a location, Alice?”

Alice shook her head. “I don’t know how much time we have. Maybe a day, maybe two. He’s still far away, but I can’t see where. He’s making decisions too quickly.”

“We can be in many safe spaces by tomorrow,” Jasper offered. “It will take him at least a day anyhow. We can set up a plan just about anywhere, if we can avoid distractions.”

“James has stopped, close by.” Alice stood still for a moment, as if she was listening. “He won’t stop us from going anywhere, and he won’t attack us.”

“What are we going to do, once we get there?” Carlisle looked at all of us, his eyes begging us for an answer. “How can we trap him?”

“I have an idea,” I said. Several pairs of glittering eyes were suddenly watching me, and I fought the wave of self-consciousness that came over me. “Why don’t we just go to my home in Phoenix? I’m sure my mom will be home by then, and you guys can all wait outside somewhere. Edward would try and get me, and you guys could spring the trap.” 

Carlisle looked like he would be ill. “You want us to use you as live bait?”

“It’s a good plan,” Emmett said as he stroked his chin. “Simple, sneaky.”

“It’s a terrible plan!”

Rosalie glared at no one in particular. “Are there any other plans? If she wants to put herself in the line of fire, so be it. Goodness knows he won’t go for me, I’m not human enough for his tastes.”

“It will work,” Alice said, her voice holding a quiet authority. I was starting to see who seemed to be the leading force behind the Cullens; with those three words, the others nodded, seeming to fall in line behind the tiny vampire. “It’s dangerous, but it’s our best shot.”

Carlisle looked resigned. “Fine... We’ll do it. But we have to be on the ball. Edward will know we are there. He just has to want Bella enough to ignore us.”

It didn’t take a lot of thought for me to decide what I would have to do. I wrapped my arms around myself, feeling shaky but sticking an assured smile on my face. “I can manage that.”

With everything settled thus far, the mood relaxed a fraction. Everyone shared hugs, talking amongst themselves for a little while. Esme was tending to Carlisle, her hand stroking his cheek and examining the scratch. It was almost healed already, but it still looked raw and painful. Carlisle was standing close to Esme, and he didn’t try and hide his sadness. Esme was crying quietly, and Rosalie went over to hug her. I stood by the car, feeling out of place. They weren’t really my family, so I had no right to feel left out, but it accentuated the fact that I was, out of them all, the most alone.

Emmett came over then, sweeping me up into a crushing embrace. “Rosaliee and I are going to head down. I wanted to tell you good luck before we left, though. Try to stay in one piece.” He set me down and ruffled my hair. “Cya, kid.”

Even Rosalie came over, giving me a distant and quick hug before following Emmett into a big, black truck. Carlisle and Esme left next, both of them offering kind words before vanishing into the city. Alice and Jasper each took one of my hands as we went to the jeep; Jasper treated me to a burger at the fast food place, and allowed me to pick the music station as we headed east and into the desert once again. 

Well... Maybe I wasn’t so alone, after all.


	19. Chapter Eighteen

     I was driving down the road, the wind in my hair as I sang along to Pink, her husky, contralto voice belting out snappy lyrics. The car zoomed along, the red paint shining in the bright, warm Arizona sunlight. I was happy, free from the cares of the world. Smiling, I looked at the road stretching ahead of me... and then my finger twitched. I shook my hands, chiding my body for being weird. But then my head swam, and I felt confused. Where was I? My body began to shake, and my hands let go of the wheel against my will. I didn’t even have time to try, my body going into a seizure as I blacked out. The last sound I heard was the horrific scream of twisting metal.  
  
     Jumping up, I woke from the dream when I heard a very real crashing noise. To my relief, it was only Jasper, checking the oil in the Jeep while Alice was nowhere to be seen. After a few moments, she reappeared, bouncing along like everything was just peachy. It was the same bounce Jasper had in his step when he’d hunted, so it was easy guess at where Alice had been. They traded places and Alice continued the drive, speeding along like normal, with Jasper sitting in the back next to me. At some point in the night, Alice pulled over and stopped..  
  
     “Look,” Jasper said, pointing. “You should get to see the Grand Canyon at least once.”  
  
     The moon, almost gone, was starting to set over a fast stretch of land. It looked massive, like it was so close that I could reach out and touch it. As I looked, the moonlight lit up the deep fissures of the Grand Canyon, and the beauty of it made me speechless. As we pulled away from the canyon, I found my voice. “Thank you, guys. I always wanted to see that.”  
  
     Alice smiled. “We’ll go see it during the day next time.”  
  
     I wanted to believe her, but the closer we got to Phoenix, the more I felt like there was a shadow looming over me. A deep, black dread had wrapped itself around my mind, and no matter how I tried to reason with it, it wouldn’t let me be. I would be safe-- there was no way that the Cullens would let Edward hurt me. There were so many of them. Alice had said James wouldn’t hurt us, so what was there to worry about? I took a breath and watched out the window, my heart pounding as, at long last, I saw the familiar lights of Phoenix. It was five o’ clock, and the sky was lightening in the east. Soon, the sun would rise over the city, and it would truly come to life. There would be music blaring out of shops, people jogging along the streets, the delicious smell of food from diners... and from the various taco trucks, scattered throughout the city. Planes would roar overhead, malls would fill up with kids who were thankful it was Saturday, and in a couple of days, there would be parents taking their kids trick-or-treating.  
  
     Home. My eyes misted up, and I let myself cry. I had missed Phoenix, and now I was back. Soon, I would be able to see my mother. While there was hesitance there, I wanted to keep her safe from Edward. No matter what had passed between us, she didn’t deserve whatever Edward would do to her if he got to my home before I did. I knew he’d get there eventually; what would he do if he found my home, but not me? Would he kill her? It was possible, and I couldn’t let that happen.  
  
     “What part of town did you live in?” Alice asked, her eyes watching me in the rear-view mirror. “Scottsdale?”  
  
     “Yeah, actually.” I got the feeling of dread again. “Why do you ask?”  
  
     Alice’s eyes looked away. “Is there anywhere to stay nearby? I’d like for us to get settled in early.”  
  
     “Uhm...There’s an inn off Pima freeway. It’s about half an hour from my mom’s place, on foot. I’d pass it on the way to the library. Alice, is everything still okay?”  
  
     “I don’t know,” she answered. “Something has changed, but I can’t see where. Someone is trying to deceive me.”  
  
     I felt panic set in. “How the hell can someone fool you? Who would know to do that?”  
  
     “Anyone who knows my limitations could try.” Alice pulled into the parking lot of the inn. “If someone was making decisions with other people involved, that could muck things up. If someone didn’t know exactly what they were doing, or if they hadn’t decided what they were going to do yet, that would also be problematic. There’s so much involved in the future. It constantly changes.”  
  
     Jasper shrugged from next to me. “But you’ve never been wrong.”  
  
     Alice’s hands tightened on the wheel. “I can make mistakes as much as anyone else.”  
  
     “Let’s not make assumptions about anything right now,” I said. Knowing her limitations, it made it less scary that Alice was confused. In fact, it all made a lot of sense; her abilities had limits, and just because she couldn’t see something clearly didn’t mean impending doom. “It’s probably just because so many people you’re watching are entering one area, that it’s all confused. Once we all get back together in a group, in one place, it’ll settle down.”  
  
     Taking a breath, Alice nodded. “You’re probably right. Let’s get inside. I can call the others and see what’s going on with them.”  
  
     We got out of the jeep, and Alice walked on ahead. I glanced at the wheel of the truck as Jasper and I walked by; there were small, finger-shaped dents in the metal. Whatever had provoked such a reaction, I couldn’t guess. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know.  
  
* * * * *  
  
     Carlisle and Esme had yet to make it to Phoenix; out of everyone, they had driven the slowest, and had stayed the most cautious. They would be in Phoenix within the hour, and planned to find a place to stay at the motel near Patterson Ranch, in case Edward decided to shave off time and come by airplane. Emmett and Rosalie had arrived before us, and were in the Pima Inn. The sun was rising, and everyone was tired; they all reported that they would move to our location when night came again, unless something conclusive happened. Alice passed along the information, and seeming content with the news, she sat on the bed and began to watch an ER marathon with Jasper.  
  
     I watched with them for a time, trying to keep my mind off of things. As the sun rose and made it’s trek through the sky, my legs and arms itched to do something; I was getting restless, knowing that my old stomping grounds were just outside the walls, and that I couldn’t do anything about it. The air in the room was stale, and the episodes of ER kept going on and on. Jasper had a bit of mercy on me; he’d brought a phone charger, and he let me play as many games on his phone as I wanted.  
  
     “You’re not used to waiting for hundreds of years,” he grinned. “I forget how it feels to have a few hours seem like days.”  
  
     Tetris kept me entertained for a few more hours, followed by BeJeweled and some pool shooting game. It was about three o’ clock in the evening when I noticed something was happening. Alice was laying on the bed; she was awake, her eyes open and unblinking. I couldn’t read the emotion on her face, but Jasper’s expression was a strange mixture of anxiety and awe. He sat by her side, his hand on her arm as he talked quietly to her. Her hand started to move, like it was searching for something; Jasper grabbed a pen and a pad of paper, sliding the pen in her hand and placing it on the paper. Alice still didn’t blink, even though her hand flew across the paper. Then her hand relaxed, and her eyes closed.  
  
     Jasper took the paper back, looked at it and picked up Alice’s phone off the bed. Dialing a number, he tapped his foot while waiting. “Carlisle, Edward is taking a plane into Phoenix from Jacksonville. It’s nonstop and he’s already in the air. It’ll be here in about four hours. We can pin him in at the airport, and go straight to Volterra. Call Emmett and Rosalie; Alice and I will meet you up there.”  
  
     “So, it’s happening,” I said to Jasper as he closed the phone. I didn’t look up from another round of Tetris. “In four hours, you’re going to have him.”  
  
     “That’s the plan. We’ll go to the airport, and get an idea of where to place ourselves. He shouldn’t be able to slip past us, especially with Alice along.”  
  
     “And if he slips past you?”  
  
     “Then we’ll start again,” Jasper said with a sigh. “It’s a pain in the ass, but eventually he’ll slip up. We can keep you safe until then.”  
  
     “Me,” I pointed out, “but not my family.”  
  
     “No. Not your family.”  
  
     I stood up, handing Jasper back his phone. “I need air for a moment.”  
  
     Jasper accepted the phone, but stepped between me and the door. “I know this is difficult, but you have to stay here with us. It’s still not safe out there.”  
  
     “Unless Edward is going to smash through the side of a plane, glide to earth like a flying squirrel and somehow make it here without roasting, I think I’m pretty safe.”  
  
     “James is still out there,” Jasper countered.  
  
     “Why is everyone so worried about him? He’s after Edward.”  
  
     “That doesn’t mean he’s safe! He followed us here. He’s working an angle that even Alice can’t see right now. And yes, he’s after Edward, but if he gets a hold of Edward, James will kill him. Do you have any idea what that will do to Carlisle and Esme? What Edward has done is terrible, but we have to settle this according to the rules of our people.”  
  
     I didn’t budge. “Who’s rules? The Volturi, whoever they are?”  
  
     “Yes, the Volturi. They are the largest and most powerful coven in the world, and they act as the law enforcement of the vampire world. With what Edward is doing, we need to take him to their city of Volterra, in Italy. It’s the only way we can do this without it breaking Carlisle. It’s one thing to have someone you love executed at the hands of the just; it’s another thing to have them slaughtered like an animal at the hands of a thrill-seeking butcher.”  
  
     It wasn’t unreasonable, but I was stubborn. I glanced past him at the door, wanting to taste freedom for just a moment. “It’s bright and sunny right now. I can be out there for just a few minutes, couldn’t I? James isn’t going to come out when the sun is like this. I’ll stand right outside the window. You can see right through the crack in the blinds,” I added, pointing out a small rift in their mock black-out curtains. “I promise I’ll be careful.”  
  
     Jasper glanced at Alice. “Well...”  
  
     Alice stirred from the bed. “Take my phone,” she said. She sat up and tossed it to me. “Push and hold the 1 button if you see anything suspicious. Stay in front of the window.”  
  
     Catching the phone, I let out a squeal of joy and shot past Jasper. I practically skipped out of the motel, taking a deep breath as I got outside and plopping myself right in front of the window like I promised I would; my butt was warmed by the sun-drenched ground, and I grinned as the cold that had been gripping me for weeks seemed to melt right out of my body. Leaning against the motel wall, I sighed in joy as the sun beat down on me from all sides. I felt relaxed, and for the first time since the adventure began, I felt safe. This way my home.. and it was warm, light-filled home, a place where vampires had to hole up in cave-like rooms to get any relief. I felt bad for Jasper, Alice and the others, but at the same time, it meant that I was safe outside.  
  
     Cheered by this thought, I decided to call my mother. Jasper and Alice were inside, talking about something; I didn’t want to bother them, and I was sure that Alice wouldn’t mind letting me call family. The phone rang three times, then a fourth. I frowned as it rang again. “Hey mom, it’s Bella,” I said as the answering machine picked up. “I’m in Phoenix. Call me when you get in, okay? Love you.”  
  
     They had probably stayed at Phil’s place near the airport, I figured. I was about to close my eyes and bask some more when the phone vibrated; I smiled, seeing my mother’s home phone number. “Hey,” I answered. “Where have you been?”  
  
     There was a masculine chuckle on the other end of the line. “Here and there,” the voice drawled. Fear, sharp and furious, wrapped around me and made my heart slam in my chest as I recognized James’ voice. “Are you there, my pretty doe? Speak up, don’t keep your mother waiting.”  
  
     “What have you done with her?” I said, the question coming out as a feeble whisper. “Where’s Phil?”  
  
     “Oh, they’re both alive and well. Mostly. See, my darling, I need you to do me a favor. And since you were so willing to be live bait for the Cullens, I’m hoping you’ll agree to this favor. I really would hate to have to kill your mommy.”  
  
     Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and distanced myself from my terror. “What do you want me to do?”  
  
     “Stand up. Walk to your little friends’ truck. Don’t worry, no one is watching.” James sounded amused when I hesitated. “Do you think that because the sun is out, that I don’t have eyes? Walk, Bella.”  
  
     I stood up and did as he ordered, walking to the truck. The door was unlocked; I glanced at the motel. Would I be able to warn them if I bolted? If I could reach them and tell them what was happening...  
  
     James’ voice turned into a low purr. “Don’t you dare. Open the door, and find your jacket that you left in the truck last night.”  
  
     Sure enough, my jacket was there. I grabbed it and frowned, hearing something in the pocket. I dug in and pulled out a slip of paper. It was folded, and my name was written on it in smooth, clear letters. “I’ve got it.”  
  
     “Good girl. I want you to do as that says. If you do, your mother and her little boyfriend will be set free. If not, well...”  
  
     “How do I know they’re still alive?” I asked. Charlie had talked about that in kidnaping cases. “I want proof.”  
  
     There was a sigh, but then I heard it in the background. “Bella?” my mother’s voice called. “Bella, honey...”  
  
     “Mom, are you--”  
  
     My mother’s voice faded, and James came back on the line. “There. Satisfied? You have four hours to figure it out, Bella. Four hours, and then she dies.”  
  
     A coil of anger rose in me. “Why are you doing this?”  
  
     The line clicked, and there was a dial-tone. Closing the phone, I scrambled out of the truck with my jacket... the paper stuffed back inside the pocket... and slammed the truck door. I ran back to the motel, slinking inside and ducking my head as Alice and Jasper hissed at me. “Sorry,” I mumbled. “I forgot my jacket in the truck.”  
  
     Jasper stared at me. “Bella, it’s over 70 degrees out there. Why did you need your jacket?”  
  
     “It’s colder than 70 degrees in here,” I said with a pointed look at the blasting air conditioner. It was the truth, even if I was using it to cover up my lie. “I just got a bit chilly. I didn’t mean to worry you.”  
  
     Alice eyed me, and for a moment, I feared she would somehow know what had happened. After all, what if they’d heard me talking outside? But she nodded, sitting back down on the bed and kicking her feet; they didn’t even reach the floor. “Just let us know next time, okay?”  
  
     Relieved, I slumped next to her feet and kept my eyes on the television set. “Okay. Hey look, ER is still on.”  
  
     I waited until the incident had been forgotten before I made a beeline for the bathroom. I took a set of clean clothes with me, turning on the tiny shower once I was in there. Locking the door behind me, I pulled the paper out of my jacket pocket and read over the angular letters. I looked at my watch; it was five o’ clock, and there were two more hours to go before the four hour deadline. I couldn’t make any decision now, not until Alice was far enough away. Instead, I chose to take a shower and wait; I brought the paper into the shower with me, dropping it and watching the paper dissolve and vanish down the drain.  
  
     By the time I was out of the shower, the clock in the room read half past five, and the sun was almost set. Alice and Jasper were getting dressed, putting on darker clothes. Neither seemed embarrassed about their partially naked state, so I chose to not worry about it, setting myself in front of the television and waiting. They were silent, with Alice putting a scarf on her head to hide her hair, and Jasper putting on a baseball cap to do the same. I didn’t ask where they got the clothes. I was more concerned with the way Alice kept glancing at me, though I pretended not to notice. I flipped through channels, focusing on what I wanted to watch.  
  
     “You don’t have to go with,” Alice said, and the suddenness of the comment made me jump. “No one is going to get you. If you want, we can find a safe space for you until this is over.”  
  
     It was my way out, and I took it. “My mother invited me to come have dinner with her and Phil tonight,” I said in the most uncertain voice I could muster. I glanced between them, letting my fear work for me; they didn’t have to know where that fear was directed. “Are you sure it would be okay? I just... I worry that Edward might hurt me, if I came with,” I said truthfully. “I think I’ll be safe with my mom.”  
  
     “And with this,” Jasper said, lifting Charlie’s gun and holster out from under the bed, where I’d hid it. “It won’t kill a vampire, but it’d sure as hell make them think twice. Where’d you get it?”  
  
     “Charlie.” I winced at the sound Jasper made. “I stole it.”  
  
     “Well that makes more sense,” Alice muttered.  
  
     She finished gathering up everything, and at six o’ clock, we were heading towards my street. At least, the street I told them was mine. I gripped my jacket, my anxiety growing as the houses became more and more familiar. I repeated my old friend Samantha’s address in my head; her mother had always adored me, and my only decision that I would go there. Directing Jasper as he drove, I felt my hear flutter when we pulled up in front of the house. There was a light on upstairs, and I prayed that my plan would work.  
  
     “We’ll come back and get you when this is all over,” Alice promised. “Are you going to be okay?”  
  
     “I think so. You all be careful, okay?”  
  
     “Of course.” Alice watched me get out of the car, and her eyes locked onto mine. “You be careful, too.”  
  
     I said nothing more as I got out of the car with my tiny bag of things. Walking to the door, I noticed that they hadn’t driven away... nor would they, until I was safe inside a house. If my best friend’s mom was home, I would be fine. If not, my mother would be dead. I knocked on the door, and let out a breath of relief as a tall, chunky woman with curly black hair opened the door. Her name was Debbie Franklin, mother of my old friend Samantha, and she look almost exactly like my mother.  
  
     She gave a pleased gasp when she saw me. “Bella, hun! It’s so good to see you! Come on in, I was just fixing dinner.”  
  
     Perfect. I turned and waved to Alice and Jasper; they waved back, driving away down the street. I walked into the house, feeling guilty as Debbie hugged me. “It’s good to see you,” I said, hugging her back. “How have things been? How is Sammy?”  
  
     Debbie rambled for a while about her mortgage, her divorce and other things I barely heard; I was too busy praying that Alice and Jasper would keep on driving. “Sammy went off to college. She’s studying to be a vet in Atlanta. Remember Mark?” Debbie asked, and I remembered Sammy’s high school sweetheart. “They decided to move in together. She’s nineteen now, you know. Time has flown by so fast. How are you? This was a surprise visit! I heard you moved to Forks to live with Charlie.”  
  
     I smiled apologetically. “I’m sorry for just dropping in like this. I just came back for a visit and I thought I’d come by to say hello. I can’t stay long, I’m going over to mom’s house to have dinner in a bit.”  
  
     Debbie gave me an odd look. “The house she’s selling?”  
  
     “She left her sunglasses there earlier,” I lied. My shock must not have shown through, because Debbie looked content with the answer. “You know how she is. She’s going to pick me up in front of the place.”  
  
     “That’s Rene. I’ll let Sammy know you dropped by,” she said with a smile. “I wouldn’t want to make you late. Come by when you have more time.”  
  
     “Sure thing!” I returned her smile, even though I felt bile in my throat as I walked out the door. “Have a good night, Debbie.”  
  
     There was no one waiting outside when I left. I started walking down the street, glancing at my watch. There was about twenty minutes left until seven o’ clock, and then Edward would be in Phoenix... and if I didn’t hurry, my mother would be dead. I walked faster, every shadow and sound making me jump. My leg throbbed as I sped up my pace, but I ignored the pain and finally reached my childhood home. The two-story, brown building was so familiar, with the scraggly lawn and palm trees flanking the driveway. My heart sank when I saw the For Sale sign hammered into the dirt, but there was no time to be sentimental. I stood in the drive-way, then turned around to face the street... just as the note had said.  
  
     A cab pulled up just then, its light off. The window rolled down, and a pale man inside peered out at me. “You Bella Swanson?” he asked in a thick accent, a cigarette hanging out of his mouth.  
  
     “Yeah?”  
  
     “James sends his regards. Come on in.”  
  
     I walked to the cab, getting into the back seat and trying to look brave. “Where are we going?”  
  
     “You’ll find out soon enough,” the drive said. His eyes met mine in the rear-view mirror, and I felt my heart thud at their crimson color. He didn’t say anything the rest of the way, occasionally flicking ashes out the window or drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. He pulled into the parking lot of a strip mall, and stopped the car in one of the darker areas. “G’luck, kid.”  
  
     “Thank you,” I said as I got out of the cab and shut the door. “Goodnight.”  
  
     The driver saluted me before driving off. I turned and looked at the building behind me. It was my old dance studio. It was black inside, but when I tried the door, it opened with no problem. My watch hit seven o’ clock, and with one final prayer to whatever powers were listening, I stepped into the studio. It was show time.


	20. Chapter Nineteen

     I almost expected an alarm to go off, but inside, everything was quiet. I dropped my bag in the middle of the floor; my eyes searched the darkness and found nothing. My footsteps echoed through the studio, but when I stopped, I heard one extra step. I wasn’t alone.  
  
     “Let’s get this over with, then,” I said, opening my hands in a gesture of submission. “I’m ready.”  
  
     Cold hands wrapped around me from behind, almost sensual in their touch. I held still, my breath coming in little gasps when I felt sharp teeth graze my neck in a silent warning. I could smell leather, and the soft sweetness that was a vampire’s venom. His hands moved over my shoulders, along my sides and through my hair. I felt like I was being examined, appraised. My teeth chattered as I waited, accepting that death could come at any moment.  
  
     James’ breath ghosted along my ear, and he chuckled. “I don’t know how he waited this long to tear out that lovely little throat of yours. It’s quite impressive.”  
  
     Sarcasm dripped from my mouth before I could stop it. “Yes, how kind of him to show restraint while he tried to murder everyone around me. I’ll be sure to thank him next time I see him.”  
  
     James spun me around then, and we were nose to nose; his eyes burned into mine, and all the playfulness in his tone was gone. “The next time you see him, the only thing you’ll be saying is goodbye.”  
  
     “Fine by me,” I snapped. “Just let my mother go, and I couldn’t care less what happens to me or to Edward.”  
  
     “He seemed so sure of your love for him.” James searched my face; I wasn’t sure what he found there, but he shoved me away and I fell backwards onto my ass. “Stop playing with me. Call him here, now.”  
  
     “Not until I see my mother.”  
  
     The vampire laughed, and it was a bitter, hollow sound. “I never had her to begin with, you wretched creature. I only said I did to get you here, so I could lure in your monster of a boyfriend. What you heard was a recording from videos, nothing more.”  
  
     I sat there for a moment, stunned. My mother was alive? She wasn’t in harm’s way after all? A hysterical giddiness bubbled up in me, and I laughed. Unlike James’ laughter, mine was shrill and filled with a strange glee. I couldn’t help it. My mother was free, and that was all that mattered. My laughter was cut short when something cracked across my face, and I realized that I’d been backhanded into a wall.  
  
     “What do you think you’re doing?” James snarled. “Do you think this is a game? Make no mistake, I will kill you if I must. I want Edward here, and I will mop the floor with your blood to do it.”  
  
     Rubbing my cheek, I struggled to push myself up off the floor. “I can’t call him. It’s not possible.”  
  
     James had me in his grip within an instant, and I cried out as he twisted my arm behind my back. “Are you going to die for him? Is that it? Do you really think he loves you? That he’ll mourn you, and come after me in a fit of vengence?”  
  
     “I don’t think that at all. I know what he did to those other girls. I know that he’s insane. If I died, he’d just move on to another target. Maybe he’d come after you, but I’d be an idiot to think it’s because he loved me.”  
  
     “Then why?” James let go of my arm and shoved me again, pinning me against the mirrored wall. The balance bar dug into my lower back, but I refused to cry out again. “Why won’t you call him to you? I know he can read your thoughts, and he’s already landing here. It’s so simple, to save your life.”  
  
     I looked into his eyes. “Are you really going to let me live?”  
  
     James met my gaze, and the openness there shook me. “If you’d cooperate.”  
  
     “Then let me go,” I growled, “before this damn bar breaks my spine.”  
  
     “Fine.” He let me go, and I dropped to the ground. Before I could move, his foot was on my leg, holding it down hard enough to hurt but not enough to cause injury. “There, you’re free enough. Explain.”  
  
     “I can’t call him, because he can’t hear my thoughts. Alice said it’s a natural ability, and I don’t know how to turn it off.” I relaxed a little as he released my leg and turned away from me. “Look, I don’t love Edward. Maybe I did at first, but I’m not an idiot. I know you’re after revenge, but--”  
  
     In the span of exactly half a second, I found myself off the ground and being dangled in the air. “Don’t think,” he crooned, digging his fingernails into my shoulders, “that you know me, my dear.”  
  
     “I know you’re Mary’s brother,” I gasped, the pain shooting down my body. “I know she was a vampire, and that Edward killed her. Alice told me that you’ve been hunting him ever since. That she got between you two once.”  
  
     James flicked me across the room like I was a toy. “Ah, dear Alice,” he sighed as he walked to where I had fallen. He picked me up again, this time by my hair. “Alice got between us, yes. She got between us because Edward was trying to kill me. You see, I almost had Edward. He’d gone down into Mississippi, and found a young little target. Another girl named Mary, a poor soul locked away in an insane asylum because she had strange dreams that came true. And then a handsome boy started following her, lured by her scent. It was a wonderful scent, I agree, but I knew what he would do to her. Before he had a chance, I turned her into a vampire. Mary Alice, born again.”  
  
     The pain was getting to be too much, but just when I thought I couldn’t stand it, he let me go. I hit the ground and stayed down, trying to breathe. His story fell into place, and I felt sick. “You kept Edward from killing Alice. She was going to be his next victim, and you saved her.”  
  
     “Perhaps.” Crouching next to me, James tilted my chin up so that I looked at him. “I could save you, too,” he said in a voice so gentle that it made me shiver. “All you have to do is bring him here, like good bait.”  
  
     “Carlisle is taking him to the Volturi. Edward won’t get past them all.”  
  
     “Yes, he will,” James said with smile. “And when he does, I want him so blinded by bloodlust that he makes just one little, fatal mistake.” His voice went from  cruel to imploring and soft, like a dark velvet working it’s way into my mind. “He can’t go to the Volturi, dear Bella. They will let him go free, in exchange for becoming their weapon. It’s what they do with vampires they find useful. This can all end now, if you do as I ask.”  
  
     I wanted to cry, to vent my pain and frustration, but the tears wouldn’t come. My voice was a strangled mewl, the words taking effort to choke out. “I don’t know how. Please believe me. I don’t know how to make it stop.”  
  
     James stood up, looking down on me. His eyes were like embers in the darkness, and that velvet voice turned into steel. “I believe you.”  
  
     “What...”  
  
     I didn’t have time to react as her grabbed me and hurled me against the wall. Panic took over, and I clawed at the floor as I tried to get up and run. He grabbed me by my bad leg, flinging me into a pile of exercise equipment; I managed to pull myself up, and this time I ran. I almost made it to the door, but James snatched me by the waist and flung me into the mirrored wall. The glass shattered, slicing into my hands and arms as I tried to get to my feet. I wouldn’t give up, wouldn’t... But then he had me by the throat, pressing me into the ground. I tried to fight back as a stabbing pain entered my mind, but I couldn’t breath. I couldn’t struggle. Blood was puddling around me, warm and tangy. With a sob, I gave up and surrendered to the pain. A screaming filled the air, and as I floated above my body, I realized it was my mind. My body’s mouth was twisting, but the sound radiated entirely from my brain, filled with rage at the invasion of all my thoughts and memories.  
  
     And then it was over, and the scream became a low keening. I came back to my body, tears streaming down my face as I tried to fight against the monster on top of me. “Please...” I sobbed, my bloodied hands pressing against his chest. “Please...”  
  
     He was cradling my head, and through the pounding of my heart and the waves of agony, I heard him whisper. James picked me up, carrying me to the far corner and setting me down; he took off his jacket and covered me, giving my head a pet. Standing, he turned and walked to the middle of the room, standing and waiting. I tried to sit up, but as the front door smashed open, I found myself trying to curl into the corner.  
  
     Edward.  
  
     “Where is she, hunter?” Edward hissed. “She is mine. Give her to me now.”  
  
     “I think not.”  
  
     A low, threatening rumble came from Edward’s throat. He took a step towards James, but then he smelled it... the blood. Edward’s eyes landed right to where I was cowering, and a furious howl shook me as he lunged. The two met mid-air, snarls and roars echoing throughout the room as their battle began.Suddenly they were right there, less than a yard away. They slowed down enough that I could see Edward, teeth bared and eyes furious; he was barely recognizable, and he was coming at me. James moved between us again, but it was immediately apparent that the blond was tiring… I had enough time to appreciate the irony of the situation. Less than an hour ago, I would have been relieved-- now, I was petrified. The hunter was the only one standing between me and that walking wall of pure rage. He hit James in the chest, knocking him through the studio wall behind me. I brought my arms up to shield my face as the wall crumbled, wood splinters and glass going every which way.  
  
     “Come with me, Bella!” Edward screamed. “You belong to me!”  
  
     My arm was under James’ jacket, and it hurt to move, but my hand found Charlie’s gun at my waist. Wrapping my aching fingers around the metal, I struggled to me feet and aimed the weapon at my once-savior. “Go to hell,” I choked out. “And don’t come back.”  
  
     Edward stared at me, and then his expression became calm. Too calm. “You do remind me of her,” he said quietly. “How unfortunate.”  
  
     Then, he attacked. I opened fire, round after round after round. It was in that second-long moment that Edward stumbled, and James came down on him, a massive shard of glass in hand. The shard pierced through Edward’s chest, pinning him to the wood floor. There was movement outside, and I thought I caught a glimpse of Erin as flaming bottles flew through the windows, shattering them. The bottles exploded on the ground, rank gasoline spilling out and catching fire. Two more bottles smashed onto the floor, and soon there was an inferno. It was a trap, and I was caught in the thick of it. I would die along with the vampires. Maybe it wasn’t so bad, I thought as I began to feel faint. One less evil in the world.  
  
     Flames moved from the wall, starting to eat up the old, dry wooden floor. The fire exit was blocked by a chunk of wall; there was no way out, and even as I took a step towards it, my legs began to buckle. There was a sudden noise behind me, and I cried out as a white form lunged at me through the flames. I raised the gun and fired the last bullet as I was knocked back. A chunk of the on-fire ceiling slammed down right where I had been standing, and I realized too late that the pale figure had been James, not Edward; blood oozed from his shoulder, but he threw the drywall blocking the exist, pushing me towards the door.  
  
     “Get out of here!” he yelled. “Just go!”  
  
     Forgive me, he had said before. I wished now that I could, but only a whimper came out from my cracked lips.  
  
     “You’re useless if you’re dead. _Run_.”  
  
     Perhaps I would have listened to him, had I been capable of running. Had I noticed the way my vision was blurring, I likely would have at least tried to move quicker. But I hadn’t, and I didn’t. The smoke, all the hits I had taken and the emotional stress had overloaded my mental wall and tipped the scale of how much I could handle against my favor; I sunk to the ground as soon as he released me, my muscles tightening. It was then that I heard the groan of the roof; I could feel it shaking and giving way through the floor.  
  
     I tried to fight it, but it was entirely too late. The last chunk of the ceiling began to fall; all I could do was close my eyes as blackness claimed me.  
  
* * * * *  
  
     I woke up to pain, and to darkness.  
  
     At first, I couldn’t sense anything besides the agony that shot up my spine, through my neck and into my skull. I felt groggy, disconnected from my body. Was I dead? No, unless I’d been sent to a very special sort of hell. I was breathing, I could wiggle my fingers and toes; it all ached, but at least it let me know I was alive and that I wasn’t paralyzed. I took a breath and opened my eyes.  
  
     Panic set in-- I couldn’t see. Gritting my teeth, I forced my arms to move. They felt like lead and I couldn’t help but whimper as my muscles burned. I gingerly felt my mouth and chin, up to my cheeks and nose. Then I touched my eyes, and relief flooded my body as my fingers touched upon fabric; I wasn’t blind, I simply had a piece of damp  cloth covering my eyes and forehead. Flexing my stiff fingers, I slowly peeled back the fabric and blinked away the filmy crud in front of my vision. The first thing I noticed was that it was no longer early morning-- it was dawn, or at least I initially thought. The weariness weighing me down was all too familiar; I’d had a seizure, and assuming it was even the same day, the pale light wasn’t dawn, but twilight.  
  
     The second thing I noticed was that I was laying on my back, staring up through pine tree branches, and I was suddenly freezing cold. My hoodie was gone… No, it had been put under my head as a make-shift pillow. There was a large rock nearby and I grasped it, using it to pull myself up into a sitting position. The fabric that had covered my eyes was a chunk of denim, and at first I was confused, but then I looked down at my legs. No wonder I was cold-- not only was I without my hoodie, my pair of jeans had become a pair of shorts. Aside from the one piece of cloth, several other strips had been wrapped around my hands and arms in an apparent attempt to halt bleeding.  
  
     I glanced around me, taking in my surroundings. I was sitting near the edge of a clearing within a small stand of pine trees, the only thing clearly visible besides me being various small to medium-sized rocks scattered about the dusty ground and one large boulder on the opposite side of the clearing. Beyond the trees to my right and behind me, behind the boulder, there was solid rock… likely a cliff. I turned my head, and stretching from in front of me all the way to my left, the sparse Arizona desert lay for as far as I could see. Only a faint glow in the distance against the darkening sky betrayed the location of Phoenix.  
  
     “You’re awake.”  
  
     I jumped, grabbing a rock and twisting to face the voice, ready to hurl my pathetic weapon. James was leaning against the boulder, far away enough that I allowed myself to relax… just a little. He didn’t seem threatening, but that meant absolutely nothing. My mind began to reel with anger and paranoia as the events from the last two days came back to my memory; I tightened my grip on the rock.  
  
     “Tell me what’s going on,” I demanded. “What happened? Where are we?”  
  
     “We’re a fair number of miles away from your lovely city of Phoenix,” he replied, not moving from his spot. “You blacked out when the roof started to collapse. I took you with me while the others arrived, and here we are. You’ve been asleep most of the day.”  
  
     “Damn it,” I muttered, dropping the rock and putting my head in my hands as I fought off a wave of nausea. Everything that had happened would come back to me eventually, I knew, but the mental fog that surrounded my memory was aggravating… And I couldn’t afford to not remember the details. Not around this man. “The fire. Did Edward...?”  
  
     “A young vampire I met insisted on helping, since he knew you. He was quite useful. Sadly, he went through the effort for nothing.” James was silent a moment, then shook his head. “Edward’s alive. As for whether he knows where we are now… I don’t know.”  
  
     I sank back to the ground. James turned his gaze to the horizon, and I took the moment to look him over. The bullet wound in his shoulder looked bad, like it wasn’t healing. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”  
  
     “I hurt you. Fair is fair.”  
  
     “But you didn’t kill me,” I said, tensing as James moved closer. “You could have.”  
  
     “I _was_ going to kill you. It would have been the kind thing to do.”  
  
     “Then why save me?”  
  
     He shrugged with one shoulder. “Even the best plans sometimes change. And like I said, you’re no use to me if you’re a pile of bones. Don’t think of me as compassionate-- I simply want to see Edward Cullen wiped from the face of the Earth. Keeping you alive gives him a reason to try and find me. It should be an interesting game.”  
  
     I felt a chill go up my spine. So, that’s how it was, then. I was free to hate this man, to not feel remorse for my actions against him or to bother seeking apologies for anything he’d done to me. I was his hostage, a device in his plan and nothing more. “Well, it’s good to know where the lines are drawn,” I said, adding as much condescension into my words as possible, shaking away the words James had whispered in the studio. “I’d hate to think you had a decent bone in your body and be disappointed.”  
  
     James stared at me a moment, then shook his head again and vanished behind a tree. I almost felt bad, but it gave me time to think without a vampire watching me, at any rate. I sat down on the rock that had been next to me, rubbing my legs and trying to get some feeling back into them. Everything ached, and I was ashamed at the vindictive urge that had come over me. Charlie had taught me to be better than that. I couldn’t find it in me to care just yet; my mind hurt, and I felt like the very core of me had been violated.  
  
     “What happened to you?” I asked. I wanted to say something, and it was the first thing to come to my mind. “You and Mary, I mean.”  
  
     He didn’t answer my question. “Are you feeling better?”  
  
     I blinked, taken aback. “Yes, why?”  
  
     “Good. Get over here, then. I need your help.”  
  
     After a brief hesitation, I stood and slowly made my way over to the tree. Maybe if I did as he asked, we could be a bit less antagonistic to each other… But what could he possibly need my help with? I grew uneasy as I approached his location, and I blushed furiously as I saw that he was shirtless. I stared for exactly one loud, fluttering heartbeat, then chided myself and looked away. “Uhm…”  
  
     He grabbed a knife that was stuck, much to my dismay, into a rock. James handed it to me handle first. “Thanks to Edward, I have glass in my back,” he said icily. “The skin healed over it, and I need it out. Now. Since I can’t magically invert my shoulders, you can do the honors.”  
  
     “I…”  
  
     “Save your excuses,” he snarled, his cheerful demeanor vanishing in an instant. “Just do it, and make it quick.”  
  
     He turned his back to me and brought his knees up to his chest, tensing; that was the end of that. I swallowed roughly, taking the knife into my trembling hand and turning my eyes to my captor’s back. How easy it would have been to just stab the blade through his neck, into his spine… had he been a normal, mortal human being. It would have been useless to try; I allowed myself a moment to clear away my murderous thoughts, and to focus on the task set before me.  
  
     There were at least six or seven immediately noticeable places where a layer of skin had formed over shards of glass. If I squinted, I could just barely see a couple smaller areas. There were ten or eleven in total… I would have to work as quickly as possible, otherwise my nerves would set in. Taking a breath, I slipped my make-shift bandages over my fingers on one hand and the knife in the other, and began to cut. The knife slipped into the vampire’s flesh easier than I expected, and I felt my stomach heave as a small bit of dark blood trickled from the wound. Sure enough, the chunk of glass worked its way to the surface; I yanked it out and moved on to the next spot, trying to fight my growing revulsion.  
  
     How long it lasted, I couldn’t say. It was only as I found myself about to work on the last wound that I noticed the passage of time. I glanced up, a small glint of shame entering my mind as I noted his tense shoulders and the way his pale fingers dug into the solid stone. Edward had often passed his kind off as invincible, unable to be hurt by a plain old human… But that was obviously not the case. Regardless of what he was or what he had done, I felt a stab of guilt. The guy deserved a little sympathy.  
  
     I realized too late that the fabric protecting my fingers from the glass had slipped. Having been lost in thought, I grabbed the sharp object in just the wrong way and I cursed to myself as blood welled up from the cut on my thumb. Before I could even register the pain, I could hear the snarl. I screamed as I was hit from the side and knocked to the ground. I snapped my arm out, the knife still in my hands, and slashed blindly at the attacking creature. A threatening, earth-shattering roar filled my ears, but suddenly I was free and I scrambled away, running as fast as I could from the clearing. I didn’t stop, I didn’t look back and I didn’t even try to think about where I was going. I didn’t think about the fact that my fastest run, a brisk limp really, would never save me.  
  
     Eventually, I came to a small cliff, and about ten feet up there was a relatively smooth ledge. It looked like a safe place to my addled brain-- not too high, and solid rock behind me so I didn’t have to worry about being sneaked up on. I pulled myself up the easy incline, adrenaline pumping strong through my veins and masking my pain. I made it up with little trouble, pressing my back up against the sun-warmed, solid rock and scanning my surroundings with paranoid intensity. I didn’t see movement, but that didn’t mean anything…  
  
     After a few minutes, the haze of terror clouding my thoughts began to lift and I was able to look at the situation from a little more of a logical perspective. The flat-topped pile of rocks was useless for protection, and looked safer when I had been thinking with haste and fear. Even so, I knew they weren’t even enough to protect me from a rattlesnake let alone an irritated, hungry vampire. I couldn’t sit up there forever… If there was a storm, I would be doomed, and the desert got alarmingly cold in the night. If I stayed put, though, maybe someone would find me. I brought my knees up to my chest, cowering as much as one could out in the open and preparing to wait out the long, sleepless hours ahead.  
  
     The sun had started to set, setting the cloudless Western sky on fire with gold and red light, almost too vivid to be real. It was beautiful, yet strange. How long had it been since I’d seen an Arizona sunset? It seemed like it had been much longer than just the few months I knew it was… So much had happened in such a short time. And now, as I sat here so close to the town that had once been my home, I found myself thinking of Forks and wishing I could see its lush, green forests again. I ached for the safety of the mountains, the clouds and the rain. I missed it more than I ever imagined possible.  
  
     I made my choice right then and there. Bella Swanson was going to go home, even if it killed her. I was going to try, and even if I didn’t make it ten steps, at least I’d have taken control of my situation for once. Standing, I descended as carefully as possible down the rocks. My heart was pounding loud in my ears, my breaths coming rapidly and in short gasps; I wasn’t traveling on solid rock or on solid legs, and I could feel both the surface of the cliff beginning to slip and my strength beginning to fail. I was moving much too quick to be sure of my footing and I heard the misstep before I felt it, the loose stone giving way under my feet and clattering to the ground. I grasped blindly at the stones around me; there was no firm hold, and I found myself falling backwards from the rocks towards the ground.  
  
     The wind was knocked out of me as I suddenly hit what felt like a brick wall. I became aware of being held, and there was relatively few people who could catch a falling person mid-air. I lashed out, my fingernails raking empty air as anger and loathing surged through me. I’d scratch the bastard’s eyes out…  
  
     “Vicious little cat, aren’t you. You spend an unnatural amount of time getting into trouble,” James said from behind me, setting me down on solid ground before I could scratch much of anything. “And then you snarl when someone saves you. No wonder Edward found you so taxing.”  
  
    I yanked out of his grasp. “Fuck you.”  
  
     He grabbed my arm, righting me as I nearly stumbled, my legs having turned to metaphorical jello. “That’s not really something one says to the person who just saved them from a cracked skull. That makes it three times now, hm?”  
  
     “Don’t touch me!” I shoved him, surprised when he actually stepped back and let me walk away. I didn’t make it much farther than I’d thought, even without him trying to stop me; my legs began to give out. I sunk to the ground under a nearby pine tree, curling up into a ball.  
  
     My skin felt like it was crawling. I rubbed my arms, absentmindedly trying to scrub away that cold touch. James walked nearer, circling around me. What was he thinking? Planning? I didn’t know, and it was maddening. At least before, I thought I’d known what to expect. Now, I didn’t know anything. No, I realized, I hadn’t ever known anything. I’d never truly known what was going on. I’d been so lost in my damn fantasy…  
  
     The blond stopped a couple yards away. “Well. That was interesting, at least.”  
  
     I stared out into the Arizona desert, bloody, tired and on the verge of hysterics. My hands were shaking, and try as I might, I couldn’t stop them. I breathed, counting slowly upon inhaling… holding… exhaling. Tears were threatening to spill down my cheeks, but I bit my cheek as hard as I could and kept breathing, counting.  
  
     James was close. He was so close that I could see his breath in the cold, autumn air, could see from the corner of my vision the rapidly healing knife mark across his cheek from our brief scuffle; a small, vicious trill of pride ran through me. It was too close though, and I tried to stand up and move away, but the best I could manage was to turn my back on him. I wanted to hate him, I wanted to strike out at him with all my might and try and tear him apart, despite the fact I couldn’t even stand up. But I couldn’t… I couldn’t even find the energy to glare at him. I was tired, I was scared and I was crying. I buried my face into my sliced-up hands, not wasting my time to even bother trying to hide the act.  
  
     Slowly, I became aware of James coming closer, his hand reaching out to lightly touch my shoulder. This small act of comfort surprised me to the point that my tears stopped, though I was still shaking. “Get away from me, damn it,” I said through clenched teeth.  
  
     “That’s not going to happen.”  
  
     “I hate you,” I hissed. “I hate you, I wish you’d go to hell and I want to go home.”  
  
     “You’re far from the only one to bear me ill-will,” he replied. The hint of dark amusement that seemed damn near permanently etched across his expression returned as I mustered enough strength to glower at him. “It’s too late, you know. Even if you could go without Edward hunting you down, you can’t possibly think that I would let you go back there now. I would be attacked on the spot by Edward’s family, unless of course you want to walk back, in which case…” he waved his hand at the miles of barren land between us and the city.  
  
     I balled my hands into fists, doing my best to not pick up the nearest rock and hit him over the head with it. “Then let’s pretend, for the sake of the argument and whatever scrap of sanity I have left, that you’re not lying about the Volturi. What am I supposed to do?”  
  
     “Trust me.”  
  
     “How?” I said to the vampire, looking up and focusing the edge of my words directly at that beautiful, deadly creature. “After all of this, how can I trust anyone?”  
  
     He was silent for a time, then spoke quietly. “Is there any other option? All I can do is tell the truth.”  
  
     The truth. Isn’t that what I’d been searching for since this journey had begun? From the moment the word ‘vampire’ had passed my lips, I had sought the truth, and yet it had always danced just beyond my grasp. And now, as I gazed into this man’s obsidian-black eyes, I thought I knew how Eve must have felt when presented with that damnable apple.  
  
     “Make your choice,” he said softly. As if there was actually a choice to make. He’d already made it perfectly clear that there was only one way left out of this mess. “And make it quick.”  
  
     Was it wrong to be frightened? Having chased this very thing for the better part of a year, was it wrong for me to want to turn around now and run away, as far and as fast as I could? Probably not… A saner person would have done such much sooner than I, which either meant I was brave or insane.  
  
     My bet was on the latter.  
  
     He held out his hand, offering to me much more than help up from where I sat. “So…?”  
  
     I took a breath and lifted my own hand, allowing myself to reach for that sweet, dark promise… as I knew I would.  
  
     “I want to know everything.”  
  
     James pulled me to my feet, steadying me before turning and heading south, deeper into the endless field of rock and sagebrush. I took one final look at the distant glow that was Phoenix, my home, before turning my back to it for the second time in my life and following the man who had until only a short time ago threatened everything that I had held dear.  
  
     He, the hunter. I, the hunted. Together, we walked into the rising night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading this! c: It was a long journey... I started writing this in 2008, and didn't touch it until September 6th, 2012. I managed to add over 40k words from the 6th to the 13th, finishing my rewrite on the 13th. Thank you to all the people who inspired me, and to the people who have generously left kudos!


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